The Reason Why I've Been Asking for Prayers for Mom and I

I’ve been asking for vague prayers for Mom and I over the last week or so via social media. Not even my closest friends really knew what was going. I was a little apprehensive about saying what it was regarding because I didn’t want people to think I was seeking attention, wanting pity for myself and the situation, or (worse) think I was trying to use emotional manipulation for donations.

Earlier this week, I felt like God was telling me to let go of my pride; the same pride instilled in me by my parents who always told me to never ask anyone for anything, especially money. I saw that it was partially pride that kept me from saying anything, so I started telling some of my closest friends what was going on. Most immediately offered to help, financially, but I still couldn't let go of that pride so I decline. Only two didn't listen to me and one of them covered what was most vital: food.

The truth is that my mother and I are in a bad way, financially. What we didn’t anticipate happening when my health took a nosedive in June was that I wouldn't be able to work as much. We were making ends meet but as soon as my productivity dropped, so did our ability to keep on top of our finances. Being partially blinded and unable to look at screens for more than a couple of minutes at a time most days is a freelance writer’s worst nightmare. I even wrote this post in chunks through both cell phone and laptop as the laptop is harder on my eyes.

My best friends knew I was planning on moving earlier this year. In fact, if I hadn't gotten sick (to the point where I can't even make myself food), I would be living in a different state right now. However, God's plans for me were different. Instead, I got sick and then I had to drain my savings completely in order to help Mom afford rent, bills, and food. Unfortunately, it’s gotten to the point where we might not even be able to afford rent much longer (they increased it by 4% last month and L.A. is notoriously expensive so you can imagine the cost). We were also worried about not having money for food until one of my best friends generously covered our groceries for the final week of the month.

Yes, it's been that bad. And, yes, I kept that hidden from friends for months. That's right, months. We had to have a cousin loan us money last month to be able to pay rent.. and since we had to pay her back this month, that made affording food more difficult. It's that bad, y'all. Since my mom is set to retire in a couple of months (and since I'm obviously not getting married or leaving home anytime soon), we've (as a family) have been looking to move somewhere more affordable as soon as we can. First, somewhere locally until my mom retires, and then possibly out of state.

My good friend, and editor of my first two novels, Kiera, knew our situation and set up a GoFundMe account to either be able to repair my current car (which needs a lot of work) or get myself a new (to me) car since mine has been breaking down often since last year. We keep putting a lot of money into repairs but things continue to break down since my car is a 1998 Honda Civic and most of the parts were original when I bought it almost 9 years ago.

As long-time readers of this blog may know, I drive my Mom to work at 4 a.m five days a week since she doesn't drive. Since we live in a shady neighborhood and there’s no immediate public transportation access that won’t put her safety at risk at 3-4 a.m., it's been a sacrifice I've been making since shortly before my father passed away (he used to drive her to work).

I know that the $5,000 goal Kiera is aiming for seems a lot but I think she did it because she'd rather see me get a new car than keep putting more money (repairs will be in the lower end of four digits) into my little Honda; the same car that, well, hasn't been the same since my car accident over 4 years ago. I'm trusting God to provide for either a new (to me) car or, the very at least, enough for basic repairs that will keep the car running for now since we can’t afford (literally) for Mom to keep taking Uber to work. We can barely afford food, how can we afford Uber?

For those who say, "Well, why don't you just work harder?" (and, yes, it's been asked), it's simple: if I could put in extra work, I would. If I could just spend all day writing for various websites and publications... or even get a job outside the house, I would! But my health isn't letting me. Let's put my eyesight and freelance writing aside. I'm too physically spent to work outside the house. In fact (only a handful of people knew this... until now), I'm so sick that I'm actually underweight by half a dozen pounds. I went from 128 lbs to 114 lbs in 4 months. My body is so spent and my diet is so restricted that I fall asleep even when eating some days. I'm that sick. There's no other way to say it.

Someone else asked, "Why are you asking for prayers when you need is money?" The reason why I asked for prayers (before Kiera set up the GoFundMe account) was that I knew God would provide somehow. Again, partial pride was to blame for not asking for money, but I also understand that there are people worse off than we are. I knew that thanks to everyone's prayers, we would either get the funds through work for me (meaning He would give me the physical strength and eyesight to work) or through some other means. Since my eyesight is still horrible (I woke up blind in my right eye twice this morning; I took a nap, which is why I say twice) and they won't give Mom overtime or even a raise, I guess God will provide this way.

I don't expect to reach the $5,000 mark... or even the $1,000 mark. I know that if it's God's will that I get a new car, He'll make sure it happens. I also know that if it's His will that we keep our car and only get enough for the repairs for it, it'll happen. Either way, I've put the situation in His hands. I've also been praying a novena to St. Philomena asking her to intercede so that I can get to Mass more often to fulfill part of my Benedictine oblate responsibilities (and, of course, the car broke down as soon as I started praying for that, lol) and I know that her intercession will also come through for me.

Swallowing any pride I may have left, I'm going to say this: if you feel a tug in your heart to do so, please consider helping out. Any little bit helps. If I could work for it, I would but I can't and we're in a desperate situation. If you can’t donate or share the link, please say a prayer for us. I know God will provide somehow and for what we need, not what we may want.

Anyway, that's it for now. My eyes keep watering from looking at the laptop screen for so long and I want to give them a rest.

I hope y'all are having a lovely week thus far!

As always, thanks for reading and God bless! :)

Does Anyone Have Any Oblate Trip Fundraising Ideas?

It's official! I know where I will begin my Oblate novitiate in a couple of months! I'm so very excited!! I had done the St. Benedict novena for his first feast day of the year (March 21st) which ended less than a week ago for this very intention -- a clear sign to where God wanted me if it was His will that I become an Oblate. I also talked to a trusted priest -- who had given me much needed advice -- exactly one week ago. I have no doubt that it was the combo of the prayers of St. Frances of Rome (did a novena to her earlier this month), St. Benedict, our parish priest, my friends (who've been praying for me during the months I've been waiting to hear from the places where I had sent my inquiries) and from you lovely blog readers who might've said a prayer for me following the March 21st post about my impatience and my will vs God's will.

For months, I had been waiting to hear back from the Benedictine monastery where I hope to attach myself to. All that time spent waiting and praying helped me be sure that it was where God wanted me, not where I wanted to go for whatever convenient or selfish reason. There was another monastery I thought I would end up at but, for several reasons, it didn't work out. In hindsight, it was best for me because I think it could've potentially harmed my spiritual life more than helped it.

Now I have the exciting yet partially stressful task of planning the trip to the retreat where I will officially begin my novitiate. I'm excited about it for obvious reasons. This is something I've been praying and waiting for for over a year when I officially began sending inquiries to monasteries. As I've begun to incorporate the Benedictine spirituality and Rule into my life, I've seen so much more peace and purpose in my life. I can see how I'm growing, spirituality, though I never notice it until much later. As excited as I am, I have one big problem: I don't have the savings to make the trip.

As many of you know, it's just my mother and I and has been this way since my father passed away almost 10 years ago. With my health not being the best in recent years, work has been hard to come by since I can currently only work from home. I've had a slight relapse over the winter months (which makes sense; I have a severe vitamin D deficiency I've yet to recover from and it's been mostly rainy and/or cloudy this past winter) which has made even freelance writing difficult. Roughly 85% of my paychecks go towards helping my mother out with keeping the household financially afloat and 13% goes towards my student loan payments. If we have anything left over at the end of the month, it goes towards my savings but it's rare when I can put part of it into savings. Also, after a particularly disastrous financial month this month, my savings also took a hit so I'm left with enough for just one way to the retreat destination.

That's where I need your help: I need help figuring out fundraising ideas. If any of you know of someone who needs a writer, a proofreader, or anything I can do from home, please let me know! In the spirit of the Benedictines, I would like to work for what I earn. Transcribing is too time consuming and doing VIPkid would not work with my own fatigue since I never know when the fatigue will overwhelm me into slumber.

I've had people suggest a GoFundMe but I have nothing other than prayers to offer as a "thank you." I also have my mother's voice in my head, drilling into me (as a child) that I need to work hard for what I want; that I shouldn't take advantage of people by asking for help, even financially. It may be bordering on a pride thing but it's something that I've heard so much over the past 33 years of my life so I feel guilty even thinking about setting up an account.

Right now, I need to save up for the round-trip fare (I have a terrible fear of flying, especially if I'm going by myself, so I'll be looking up both train and flight fares), the $ I'll spend on food during the trip, for the actual retreat, and the car rental fee/Lyft costs when I arrive at my destination. I don't want to say when the trip is or where I'm headed for privacy issues but I do plan on blogging the experience after it happens. I'm also withholding which monastery I'll become a novice with from public knowledge for now, again, due to safety and privacy issues. Once the time of the trip comes, I'll share as many details as I can give. :)

So, does anyone have any ideas or know of anyone who needs a writer or proofreader? Please send me any leads you may have!

Alright, well, that's it for now. I'm going to go try to figure out Amtrak (and flight, gulp) fares and crunch some numbers.

I hope you're all having a lovely start of the week!

As always, thanks for reading and God bless! :)

So Much News! So Many Prayers Answered!

Hey! Long time no see, huh? Honestly, I've been wanting to share a lot of this stuff for at least a week but I needed confirmations and "done deals" before I could say anything.

Do you know how hard it is to keep the good news to yourself? SO difficult, my friends. I did let some people know ahead of time and those closest to me knew what was going on as things happened but I wanted to wait before I publicly talked about this. Intrigued yet? lol.

First, let me say, happy (belated) feast of my beloved Bl. Pier Giorgio Frassati. *insert fangirl squeals, confetti, noisemakers, and cake* The reason why I bring him up is that all of this happened either during the annual feast day novena (June 25 - July 3). I do it every year but this year... well, you'll see... ;)

The first big news is that I am officially a contributing writer for Verily Magazine. Do some of you remember how I asked for prayers (via Twitter) about a dream writing opportunity that came up a few weeks ago? It was for Verily. They're restructuring the magazine, adding new content, new writers, etc. and they were looking for new writers. I submitted three possible topics and they accepted two of them!

I don't know if I'll write for them beyond the two articles but it's a good start! This is my dream writing gig because I've been a regular Verily reader since the beginning so I hope it's the start of more work for them.

As much as I love writing for Catholic publications, it's hard to find writing work in this particular field/topic. There are so many great apologists and writers who are more established and, well, better writers than I am, so getting paid for writing gigs in the Catholic world is hard. If it wasn't for my friend (and fellow epicPew writer) Theresa, I wouldn't even have my EP writing gig.

I've been praying for more writing work because, as y'all know, Mom and I have been in a financially difficult situation for months. This was one of the two novena intentions I had for this year's Bl. Pier Giorgio novena; more work (because I actually like to work) that I can do with other pending responsibilities and things that keep me at home.

There is something else that also happened but it's something that's going to stay within the family. All I have to say is this is a major on-going thing that we've been praying about and it looks like we've finally gotten answers! Thanks be to God!

So, all of this happened either during or immediately after Bl. PGF's novena so... guess who gets the credit for his intercession. Someone canonize him STAT! lol. Seriously, though, I know he -- and Mama Mary and so many other saints -- interceded for me. I'm just giving him credit because of the timing and the novena intentions.

Thank you ALL for your prayers. It wasn't just Bl. PGF and my heavenly pals. It was a collective prayer effort and I'm eternally grateful to all of you who've never ceased praying for me. May this be the light at the end of the tunnel for some major issues and a heavy Cross I've been carrying for quite some time. Cue the tears! lol. All of this has been really difficult for me... so much more than I've been able to express. I know that everyone praying for me has helped lighten the load.

I also know that all of this has been for my own good. I've learned to take better care of myself. I've learned to trust God. It's helped cure me of some of my worst scrupulous ideas. I'm sure some of it has been penance for some dumb things I've done (which I fully get and accept).

That's it for now. I've shared what I can. There may be more news I haven't even hinted about coming up but we shall see what happens. Y'all know by now that I know until I'm absolutely sure before I share anything. lol. ;)

Anyway, I hope you're all having a lovely week thus far and that you have a cool weekend... and I say "cool" in the "not melting" sense because it's going to be a scorcher across the States and many other countries.

As always, thank you for reading and God bless. :D

The 54-Day Rosary Novena Begins Tomorrow!!

The 54-day Rosary novena begins tomorrow. I'm so happy new people are joining in this year! This is just a friendly reminder that if you want to join in and want me to send you daily reminders -- either by email or tagging you on a daily novena post on the blog's Facebook page, you need to let me know today or ASAP so I can add you to the list.

Since the novena begins tomorrow, here are some tips and notes for y'all who have never done it before.

• There are two versions of it, one includes the Luminous mysteries and the other has the traditional mysteries. You are free to choose whichever you like. I had done the version with the Luminous mysteries the first couple of times I did it but I went the traditional route last year.
• Find a way to keep track of what mysteries you have to do for the day. I will be letting those of you who want reminders know which day we're on, but not what mystery to do because some people will do the "original" version and the others will add the Luminous mysteries.
• If I'm not reminding you, please find a system that works in reminding you. I'm personally using my Wunderlist app to remind me of the day... which, in turn, will help me remind y'all. I made a calendar for my mom last year so she would just cross out the day we were on as soon as she completed the Rosary.
• If you have a tendency to space out on intentions from time to time (*points to self*), you can write them down on a Post-It next to your screen if you're using the website I've always used or you can print out the prayers/novena and write them down somewhere to remember. If you have a booklet you're using, you can write it down on a scrap of paper or an index card and place it in your booklet.
• Be sure to carve out time in your day to do this novena... and don't do it last minute. This novena takes a bit longer than the normal Rosary because of the additional prayers. It personally takes me about 20-25 minutes but that's because I'm used to it. It took my mother, who did not pray the Rosary regularly, 30-40 minutes. You'll soon get in the groove and it won't take you as long to complete it.
• Don't let the length of the daily Rosary novena OR how long this novena in general (the 54 days) intimidate you. I know it seems daunting at first but it will fly by quickly before you know it.
• Please feel free to share any big intentions on the blog's FB page if you feel inclined. Also, please pray for others' intention if you wish to. This is not an obligation.
• If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to ask. If something isn't making sense (and some things didn't make sense to me when I first did it), please let me know. I would be more than happy to help you out in any way I can. :)

And that's it for today. I have two exams to study for as well as a slew of other things I need to do before it gets any later in the day since Mom and I have planned to shut ourselves up for the evening/night. We're not big on Halloween (e.g. we watch Elf today instead) and we live in a somewhat dodgy neighborhood so, for safety reasons, we choose not to give out candy either. 

I hope y'all have a lovely day and week. If you're going out tonight, please be safe. Oh! And, please, don't forget that tomorrow is a Holy Day of Obligation. There. Now you can't say you didn't know. You're welcome. ;) 

As always, thanks for reading and God bless! :D

Want to Join in on This Year's 54 Day Rosary Novena?

My apologies for the long gap between blog posts but I had a crazy week last week with two exams, a quiz, and a big assignment. I have an easier week this week (it's lecture/reading week; next week is exam week once again) so... new blog posts this week! I have 3 posts in the drafts box and two other ideas that I will also get to this week. I won't post them all this week but I will schedule some for next week so there's stuff going up even when I'm trying not to drown in speech-pathology and audiology terms, facts, and procedures.

This post is going to be a quick one since I'm having a decent non-mental fog day (which are becoming increasingly rare; thanks, chronic fatigue...) and I want to get some studying done while I can.

As some of you may remember, last year we had a surprisingly large (well, large for this blog) number of people who joined in on the 54-day Rosary novena. I had a list of people I emailed, tweeted, and tagged (in FB) every day with reminders about which day we were on for those 54 days. I don't know about everyone else, but I had some amazing results almost immediately after the novena... and both Mom and I are still seeing results nearly a year later. The novena has been truly changing for us and I know it's been the same for others.

Of course, I'm going to throw a word of caution: this novena is not for everyone. Some people (including myself; I've done this novena several times over the years) have experienced a continuous Murphy's Law streak during the entirety of the novena. If someone can go wrong, it will go wrong. Not everyone experiences it (Mom didn't and I only had one thing go wrong throughout the novena last year). I've known people who've done the novena with us over the years and they've only seen the good that the novena brings. Still, I have also heard of people who've abandoned the novena because they've gotten overwhelmed with the bad they've encountered. However, in my experience, the good always outweighs the bad (in hindsight) and if you have a huge intention that you really feel stuck on, I would highly recommend doing this novena. Please don't let what I've just said scare you off; I'm only informing you that this novena can really test someone so that you're prepared if you want in. Keep frequenting the Sacraments and you should be fine. ;)

Having said that (and potentially scared some of you who've never done this novena before, lol; sorry!), I'm wondering if anyone of you would like to join us this year. Again, we're starting on November 1st (All Saints' Day) and we're ending on Christmas Eve, which is the recommended time of year to do this novena. Yes, it's exactly 54 days (Sundays included) between All Saints' Day and Christmas Eve. Amazing, right? ;) I obviously can't tweet reminders this year but I would happily tag anyone who wants to join in on this blog's Facebook page or even email you if you think you'll need daily reminders. I certainly don't mind.

I already posted this invitation a couple of weeks ago on the FB page -- and we've got a couple of people who will be joining in -- but now I'm blogging it for those of you who are not on FB (neither following this blog's page nor on that site at all). If you would like me to email you reminders, please let me know where to email you reminders. I'm really sorry, Twitter folks, but I've already explained why I needed to close down my @nerdwriter account in the last blog post.

Anyway, please let me know by All Hallow's Eve (next Tuesday) so we can all start together next Wednesday. :)

I hope y'all are having a lovely start of your week and that you had a great weekend! :D

As always, thanks for reading and God bless! :D

Why I (Nearly) Left the Church Recently

My Bl. Pier Giorgio Frassati Rosary bracelet.

This is something I'd been holding back on for weeks (that, probably, no one other than 2 people know about) but I think is now the right time to share: there was a point, last month, where I came very close to becoming completely apathetic towards the Church... or, at least, I felt like I was going to leave it. In fact, I was scared that I wouldn't be strong enough to resist the idea of leaving. Before I go into details, I'm going to say I am not blaming any people I will mention in this post. Yes, I'm hurt and it didn't help the situation but I do not blame them for nearly causing the apathy.

This past Lent was rough for me. I got sick (a bad cold after being subjected to freezing -- for L.A. standards -- temperatures in light layers). I accidentally had dairy when I went to Mexico and I spent the next month being physically debilitated because of it. I dealt with the last of the problems I had due to the anemia and everything else. I was racially profiled for the first time in my life. My spiritual life took a big hit, too. I was expecting it as both Advent and Lent are prime times for the enemy to mess with us. However, I wasn't expecting it to hit as intensely as it did.

I was hit with doubt and indecision about almost everything. I felt as if I no longer had any clarity about what God's will was for me and my life. In fact, I had zero plans for my life. I had tanked one of my courses in my SLP program which led to the decision to leave the program and look for a way to pay back my student loans.  I went 4 months without receiving the Eucharist. I tried to go to Mass but obstacles hit me left and right. The anemia and the accidental dairy ingested caused a terrible lightheadedness and physical fatigue that made it impossible for me to safely drive to Mass. Taxi cabs failed to pick me up and take me to Mass without explanation. Last month I experienced three consecutive weekends of what seemed to be physical manifestations of intense spiritual attacks that both holy water blessed this past Epiphany and the medal of St. Benedict helped shorten the effects of, immediately. I won't elaborate more on it beyond that. I will say that it was during those intense three weeks that the apathy threatened to take hold.

During that time, what my former spiritual director said to me (twice!) kept replaying in my mind: that there was no point in me being a Catholic because I stunk at being one. Well, that's what I interpreted. His actual words during our last spiritual direction meeting (in which he kicked me out of his office) were "what's the point?" (in my being Catholic). Direct quote; I wouldn't dare attribute false words to anyone, much less a priest. What was the point of me being a Catholic if I didn't attend Mass regularly? What was the point of me being Catholic if I struggled to concentrate during my time in prayer? What was the point in my being Catholic? These words swirled around in my mind when I tried praying, especially when it was the Rosary or the Chaplet of Divine Mercy. I would want to quit praying, wanting to give up, but I powered through the rest of the prayers (with a little help from holy water).

As I've mentioned in the past, I joined a young adult group late last year but I haven't been to many meetings/get-togethers this year. Mostly, it's been because I've been physically unable to. There were also meetings I wasn't told about (that I had no idea were even going on) so I didn't go because I had no idea. They've been nice people... but I've also not felt welcomed. I feel absolutely horrible for saying that (and I promise I'll get to the point of sharing this soon) but it's true. As much as I like the group of people, I feel like I'm excluded from what they do. It's understandable; they've been more active in parish activities (the majority being part of the choir) and they see each other more but it still stinks to feel left out. The kicker was when I contacted one of the members and suggested that we try to help set-up a more frequent carpooling system to outings in which they charged for parking... and a suggestion she, herself, had pitched to the group for that specific outing. She told me to work it out myself because she was too busy to help me for a different Mass event I wasn't even talking about. I felt the heat rush to my face and my ears when I read her response. It had been her idea; I only suggested perhaps setting up something so that the carpooling could begin before the outing (it was going to start at Mass and then end up at a different location) since some of us (I'm not the only one) have transportation issues sometimes. I've seen people (in the group and from the parish in general) ask for rides, so it was a suggestion to help them out. I had a way to get to get to Mass and the outing; it wasn't even for me. Needless to say, between that response, another group member publicly embarrassing me for something I'd say in all seriousness at the last big (read: crowded) meeting I attended and feeling like I wasn't welcomed... I decided to no longer attend group meetings.

All of these things -- what my former spiritual director had said and my experience with the members of the young adult group -- and my inability to go to Mass all contributed to me feeling and thinking that perhaps my former spiritual director was right and that me praying, doing my best (and failing spectacularly when I began doubting myself, especially when it came to my ability to go to Mass regularly), and not finding my place in the Church meant I should throw in the towel. I had these strong thoughts and feelings for almost the entirety of May. Add me feeling as if I didn't know what I was going to do with my life and everything else I mentioned... I was in a bad place.

On a whim (I don't remember if it was inspired by a dream I had that featured him or if he just kept popping up in my mind), I decided to start a Bl. Pier Giorgio Frassati novena on May 1st. I mentioned it to Mom and she also, quite suddenly and without giving it much thought, said she would pray it along with me. I got the novena prayers in Spanish from the Frassati Argentina group for Mom and we prayed for the same things: clarity about my career/vocation (small v) and my health. The spiritual attacks (or what I think were attacks) got worse when I did the novena... but I didn't stop. Though the thoughts persisted that I should leave, remembering Bl. PGF's life story kept me from pulling away. I use to remember his ardent love for the Church. I also remembered how both St. Therese of Lisieux and St. Teresa of Calcutta (Mother Teresa) had moments in which they felt God had abandoned them as well so I kept going. I think I only missed praying the Rosary once and that's because I fell asleep because I felt unwell. Other than that, I don't think I missed either morning or nighttime prayers. Bl. PGF remained in my thoughts (and my heart) as my birthday approached. Whenever I felt like giving up, I would remember him and I tried to fight through the apathy and disappointment.

As silly as it sounds, the moment that I feel was the turning point was when I received my lab results at my second hematologist appointment. To know that my prayers had been answered reduced me to a puddle of tears and gratitude at the hospital (where my hematology appointments occur). I had been slowly gaining weight in the past year but I didn't break past the 124-125 mark (I'm usually between 125 and 128 lbs) and it would occasionally dip back down... until I did the novena. My weight, as I mentioned before, has remained steady and is back to where it was prior to my health issues starting 5 years ago. It took years to get down to the source of my health problems (sans those that are causing low platelets). It was the moment where I went "I suffered through so much... but I can see that God didn't abandon me. He heard my prayers despite my not going to Mass and my failure... and Bl. PGF came through for me in a big way." A day or two after receiving the wonderful news that I was healthier than I had been in years, the rest of my prayers (that were part of my novena to Bl. PGF) were answered.

The weekend before my birthday I returned to confession and Mass for the first time in 2 months. I have not failed to go to either confession or Mass since. On my birthday I got word on something (career related) that I'd been praying about, literally within 5 minutes of my waking up. (side note: totally counting that as a birthday gift from God, lol). I now have a clear(er) path that I will be taking starting this autumn when the next phase begins. I also got inspiration for my third novel, which was scrapped and started over again for the third time but which has stuck. (second side note: I'm glad I started over; this new idea is so much better than the first two I had.)

I feel like myself again. I feel that great love I have towards the Church though I've still struggled with certain things like overindulgence and temptations in recent weeks. As I mentioned a couple of posts ago, my new confessor suggested focusing on my spiritual life this summer which I've been doing. I want to get into my problem with my experience with Ordinary Form Masses vs Latin Masses (and the communities for both) but I'll save that for the next post. Let's just say that I had a big eye-opener regarding this and it's what I'll be working through this summer. For now, I'm just trying to keep my confession and Mass attendance more regular, I want to figure out what I could do to help my concentration problem during prayer time, and I want to kick the bad habits I developed/that returned while I went months without attending Mass. Baby steps... but happy that I didn't leave the Church and grateful for the intercession Bl. PGF helped with.

I bought myself a Rosary bracelet with a medal of Bl. PGF to wear and use (to pray until I get myself the complete Rosary) for my birthday as a reminder of why I'm a big Frassati fangirl. That's what this post's picture is of; the Rosary bracelet. It's already helped me focus when praying the Rosary despite being like twice my width of my wrist, lol.

And before any of you say anything: yes, I know that feelings can trip us up and that we shouldn't pay attention. I also know that even in our darkest moments, God is always there for us. I kept reminding myself of that when I was struggling... but it didn't always help. Sometimes your mind can play tricks on you, just like your heart can. The devil knows how to best kick us when we're already down. Don't you think he knows that the easiest way to get me down is to make me feel unloved and rejected? Hi, I'm an INFP and phlegmatic-sanguine over here; I'm a people person despite being an introvert. I say I'm a social introvert for that very reason -- I like people. Making me feel like I'm rejected by people I admired -- my spiritual director and members of the group which I so wanted to be a part of? He knew how to get to me... but God is greater than him and God knows that my stubbornness (when used for good), my optimism (which did waver for a while), and tenacity are some of my best strengths. He knew that Bl. PGF was the best way to pull me out of that abyss of spiritual dryness and doubt.

I'm sure there were countless prayers that I don't know about, which helped me get through all of this. To those who prayed for me during this time, I want to say a massive "Thank you!" To those who I personally know are struggling through the same thing or something similar, please know I add you into my prayers specifically by (full) name because I understand how difficult going through this is. If you're going through doubts about the Church or anything of the sort, please don't be afraid to talk to someone... or even ask others for prayers. I volunteer to pray and fast for you; just let me know privately. I don't want anyone to go through this... or worse.

Anyway, this -- sharing what happened to me -- had been on my heart since last night and I'm grateful to be able to share it with you. I'm not fully out of the danger area (are any of us?) but I'm in a much, much better place than I was last month. Bl. PGF's feast day is coming up early next month so I'll be reposting the novena prayers (they differ daily) every day on this blog later this month leading up to his feast day (July 4th). I didn't think it was possible but I've become a bigger fan of his (and my mother is a (new) massive fan now that she saw the big changes since we did the novena) and I'm full of gratitude for his intercession. As he would say, "verso l'alto!" ("towards the heights!")

It's getting hot in my home office (it's already in the low 90s and it's only 12:25 p.m.) so I'm going to end this blog post and go migrate to another part of the apartment before I have to go pick up Mom from work.

I hope you're all having a lovely week thus far!

As always, thanks for reading and God bless!

Amazing Rosary Novena Results

A couple of amazing things happened while I prayed the 54-day Rosary novena (from All Saints' Day through Christmas Eve).

- I was described as "bubbly" for the first time in a decade. This isn't new for me -- I've been called "bubbly" many times -- but it's something I haven't heard in so long because I fell into this spiral of self-consciousness right before I reverted to the Church when I was 21. That self-consciousness came across as shy, which I was as a result of it.

- I've apparently displayed a confidence that few people (at least those who haven't known me for over a decade) have seen and it's shocked them. I heard a few "who are you?!" comments a few weeks ago because I surprised people with how talkative I was during an outing with the young adult group I've become a part of. I've always been reserved and an introvert but I'm actually a somewhat of a social introvert. I like talking to people and socializing, but in small doses and in certain circumstances or else I get fatigued and, therefore, quiet. After socializing I need a good day or two to recover, too. Again, I was overcoming with self-consciousness which hindered the social side for a decade but I seem to have rediscovered it.

- I tanked the exams during the first half of the novena, the ones I studied the hardest for. When I stopped stressing over them, started taking better care of myself (by slowing down and resting more often), I actually did better on them. In fact, I did better on my final exams than I did on all the other exams... and most were comprehensive final exams.

- The people-pleaser side of me seemed to have finally gotten a clue and I've been thinking less about how people would react to my thoughts and words. That's not to say that I don't think about wording certain things more carefully so I don't offend or hurt other people, but I've certainly stopped caring about what they think about me personally. The (seemingly) controversial post on mental and emotional purity is an example of that.

- I had a number of things pop up (i.e. having to repeat a course due to a classmate's plagiarism - which affected my grade, having a temporary financial aid suspension, etc.) which would've normally sent me on an anxious doom spiral but which didn't affect me as much during the novena. I'm sure that it goes back to my resolve to trust God completely and let go of my stubbornness in favor of doing His will. Once I started doing these two things, my world completely changed for the better.

- The St. Andrew Christmas novena -- which began during the second half of the Rosary novena -- included the intention of detaching myself from everything that was harmful to my soul... which included a lot of things that I'm (still) very attached to and will take a lot of work to overcome. I knew what it meant giving up and yet I still prayed for it. I had no idea where the idea came from and was surprised when the words first came out of my mouth on the first day but it was something I continued to pray for from St. Andrew's feast day through Christmas Eve.

You want to know the best part of all of these things? None of them were intentions of the Rosary novena. I won't say what the intentions were (half of them weren't even intentions for me, personally) but they were not any of the things I described. Yet, they all make sense in one way or another. I feel like God prepared me for my specific intentions by allowing me to go through everything I went through during the novena. It's all helped me begin journeying down a road that will lead me closer to Him and doing His will, which is, ultimately, all I could ask for.

I don't know if or when my specific intentions will be answered -- especially the life-changing ones -- but I've already learned to be more proactive, more optimistic (I can hear some of you going "oh nooo... not more!" lol), and completely trust God. My outlook on life is different. I'm really excited about all the changes that came from the novena and I hope that they continue to produce more fruit as the time goes by. :)

Anyway, I just wanted to share this because I know some people are hesitant to start one. Yes, things that could go wrong went wrong. Yes, obstacles will come at you from different sides. Yes, you can have terrible "luck" but the outcomes far outweigh whatever crumbs come your way. :)

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a lot of books (some of which were Christmas gifts) to lose myself in while I still have the time to do so. ;)

As always, thanks for reading and God bless! :D

How I Said "Yes" to God This Week

I will admit, I did not know about this #GraceOfYesDay until the pre-dawn hours this morning. I've been so disconnected from Catholic social media (thanks for that, COMD program... more on that in a bit) that I had missed the memo. However, I'll tell you how I said "yes" to God this week. First, the background story.

As some of you (especially those following me on Twitter) know, it was decided that taking a permanent leave of absence from USU's Communicative Disorders and Deaf Education program was the best option for me. "Superwoman," as some of my friends jokingly call me, hit her "do not pass go; do not collect $200" limit last week. And the decision to leave wasn't done on impulse; it involved a lot of prayer over several weeks.

I had two exams last week, one for Statistics and another for Audiology. At this time, I have not received my Statistics exam score but I was pulling a B or B+ in the class so I'm not worried there. As for audiology, I failed. I spent days (all day on some days) studying. I was so focused on memorizing things and on watching lectures that my mom had to help make me lunch and/or dinner so that I would eat; I literally didn't have the time to make myself something to eat because of the amount of material covered on the exam. I took about 30 pages of handwritten notes. I made flash cards. I woke up early on exam day to go over the notes one last time. I went in confident that I was going to ace the exam... and came out of it earning a 58/98. It was the exam that I studied the hardest for and it was the lowest exam grade I had received on an audiology exam. With that failed exam, there wasn't a way I was going to pass the course with anything better than a C+; a course that was a prerequisite for other courses next semester. Later that day, I received news that a professor's TA (the same class in which the professor falsely accused me of plagiarizing a bibliography) had given me a 9/15 on an assignment I worked hard on; one that I turned in early. She claimed I hadn't submitted all the documentation necessary to complete the assignment when, in fact, I had. The grades stand in that professor's class (even when it's their mistake) so that would've given me a C+ in the class. It doesn't sound like failing except that USU has a "B- or better" policy in grades so I would have had to repeat the course. All of that would've put me back a couple of semesters which meant more loans and more stress on my health that I simply could not afford.

As I've mentioned in previous posts, the stress of the courses has greatly affected my health. I haven't weighed myself in a week or so but I was underweight the last time I checked. The stress headaches I was getting when studying for exams were horrific. I wasn't sleeping or eating well. After working my tush off and trying to push myself beyond my limit, I couldn't overcome some of the obstacles thrown my way. The professor's accusatory episode aside, there were a number of other things thrown my way that I now look at as signs that this wasn't meant to be for me. Does this mean I regret taking this path? Not one minute.

I'm incredibly grateful for having had the experience. Thanks to my time in this program, I've been able to show myself that I am capable of so much than I had previously thought possible. While I had once thought that I wasn't capable of teaching in a classroom setting due to my anxiety, the observation/"hands on" hours working with children who are in need of speech therapy showed me that I could. The unfortunate episode with the professors also made me want to teach because it reminded me of how important teachers and professors are at all academic levels. Not only that, the program really made me learn to trust God. I placed everything in His hands in the past couple of weeks. "If you want me to continue down this path, please help me pass these exams. If I don't pass them, I'll know that you want me to go for my Theology M.A." Novenas, prayers from my mom and friends, lots of studying hours, and looking into Plan C (no, I didn't want to leave the program completely) and I still wasn't passing. That's when I knew that I had to say "yes" to God and trusting Him with my career path.

If you've been reading this blog throughout my SLP journey, you know that I initially took this path for financial stability. Yes, I would be helping people (which is what I've wanted to do since I was a child) but ultimately I just wanted to be able to help take care of household expenses. Freelance writing wasn't helping and there weren't (and still aren't) many jobs I could do with a Religious Studies B.A. I've wanted to work for/with/in the Church since my reversion. The passion and fire to help others discover the Truth has always been there... but the job market made me scared. It wasn't until I decided to leave everything in God's hands a few weeks ago that I realized that I wasn't trusting Him to help me find a job upon completion of the M.A. Fail, Emmy... massive fail.

I'm leaving my career path (just like I'm leaving my vocation) in God's hands. I will do His will if He helps me figure out what He wants me to do. I've felt at peace about leaving the SLP path and taking a leave of absence from USU since I received my exam score on Friday. Seriously, I felt amazingly at peace when I saw the test score and knew I wouldn't be continuing. I'm disappointed that something I worked hard towards won't result in anything but a good learning experience for me... but I'm relieved at the same time. I'll be de-stressing over the next couple of weeks (though still working on editing the novel sequel). I'm also incredibly excited about what He has in store for me. I've already sent in my applications to two (for now) wonderfully orthodox Catholic colleges/universities and I hope that I get accepted by one of them. If you can please say a prayer that I get accepted wherever God wants me, I'd greatly appreciate it.

For the tl;dr crowd: I have said "yes" to (what I feel is) God directing my path towards a Theology M.A. and, eventually, to sharing the Truth to the next generation(s) to the best of my abilities. The road is unknown and the job market for those with a Theology M.A. is scary at times but I'm choosing to follow His will (or at least what I think is His will for me) and not doing what will bring me selfish comfort.

And that's it for now. The St. Cecilia novena will continue to be posted until the 21st. I won't get a chance to post the links tomorrow but they're all scheduled to be posted at 8 a.m. PST regardless of whether I tweet/link it in the FB page or not. :D

As always, thanks for reading and God bless. :D

Unable to Find the Right Words

This past week (and especially the last couple of days) have been a little strange for me. I've found myself speechless more often than not for a multitude of reasons. The two biggest reasons have something in common -- the potential loss of a parent.

A few days ago, the mother of one of my oldest friends had a hemorrhagic stroke and today the doctors said she was brain dead. Right now the family is waiting for guidance (and/or a miracle) to make the decision on whether or not to "pull the plug." At the same time, the father of another good friend is not doing too well (he has a brain tumor that can't be treated with chemotherapy) and he may have days to live. I've found myself not being able to come up with anything to say other than they're in my prayers (which they are) and that I'm there for them (which I am). I've been in their shoes before but I find myself unable to say the right words.

Are there any right words to say in these types of situations? I had some incredible friends who knew the right things to say 5 years ago while my father was living his last weeks. Other friends gave me my space and I suspect some of them did it because they (like me, right now) didn't know what to say. I feel like everyone says the same thing (or are more eloquent) so all I can say is what I've already mentioned ("you're in my prayers", "call/text me if you need me.")

I know myself well enough to know that if I speak exactly what I feel, I'm going to end up sobbing or making them (unintentionally) cry. I feel things very deeply and I'm sensitive to seeing others in any type of pain. If you don't believe me, read the article I wrote for Envoy Magazine about my experience with my father's death; I've never had so many grown men tell me that my words made them tear up. I'm actually sitting here, trying not to tear up as I type this out. Just knowing that my friends are going through one of the most difficult things (losing a parent) is hard.

I don't live close enough to my friends to be able to physically be there for them. If I could, I would be there, at the hospitals or helping in any way that I could. They're in my heart and on my mind all day. They're in my prayers and in the prayers of my friends whom they don't know. I still hope and pray for miracles but I don't know what else to do. Why don't I feel like that's enough? Before my father's death, I didn't have much experience in this field... and I still haven't had much since. I'm at a loss of what to do. I'm just "typing out loud" at this point.

Can y'all please pray for both of them and their families? I may be unable to find the right words to say but I can, at least, help spread the news so that we can all storm heaven with prayers.

That's it for now. Sorry this post is kind of a bummer but this is what's been on my mind lately.

As always, thanks for reading and God bless. :D

St. Dymphna Novena, Day Nine

Day 9: For Chastity

O God, lover of innocent souls, Thou gavest St. Dymphna the virtue of angelic purity which made her reserved in all her actions, modest in her dress, attentive in her conversation, upright in her character, so that she even shed her blood to preserve this precious virtue. Through the intercession of St. Dymphna, we beg thee to bestow upon us the virtue of chastity that we may enjoy peace of conscience in this life and pure eternal joys of heaven hereafter. Through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

Pray the Our Father, Hail Mary, and Glory Be five times

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If any of you have any specific prayer requests and don't think you'll be able to do the novena, please let me know. :)

God bless,

St. Dymphna Novena, Day Eight

Day 8: For Temperance

O God, You made St. Dymphna resplendent in the virtue of temperance so that she mastered sensual inclinations and used temporal goods prudently. With temperance she combined the beautiful virtues of modesty, docility and humility. Let us not forget that humility is called the foundation of all virtue because it banishes from the soul pride, the obstacle to grace. Through the intercession of St. Dymphna, we beg Thee to guide and direct us, so that being preserved from evil and nervous disorders, we may obey till death the commandments and counsels Thou hast given us. Through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen. 

Pray the Our Father, Hail Mary, and Glory Be five times 

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If any of you have any specific prayer requests and don't think you'll be able to do the novena, please let me know. :)

God bless,

St. Dymphna Novena, Day Seven

Day 7: For Fortitude

O God, rewarder of those who remain firm in their good resolutions, Thou gavest St. Dymphna such a love of virtue that she had the courage to suffer privation, persecution, and even martyrdom. Through her prayers we beg Thee to grant us fortitude that we may courageously and perseveringly overcome ourselves and finally conquer the enemy of our salvation. Through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen. 

Pray the Our Father, Hail Mary, and Glory Be five times 

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If any of you have any specific prayer requests and don't think you'll be able to do the novena, please let me know. :)

God bless,

St. Dymphna Novena, Day Six

Day 6: For Justice

O God, source of eternal justice, Thou didst inspire St. Dymphna to flee from her country and her father in order to render to Thee that which was Thine. Through her intercession we beg Thee to make us seek after justice so that we may perform our duties toward Thee as we ought. Though Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

Pray the Our Father, Hail Mary, and Glory Be five times

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If any of you have any specific prayer requests and don't think you'll be able to do the novena, please let me know. :)

God bless,

St. Dymphna Novena, Day Five

Day 5: For Prudence

O God, ruler of the universe, Thou didst allow St. Dymphna to discover a helpful means of avoiding the evil intentions of her father. Through the merits of Thy holy servant, be pleased to grant that we may become, according to the words of Jesus, simple as doves and wise as serpents, so that through prudent advice and sound judgment we may recognize what we must do to achieve the great work of our salvation. Through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

Pray the Our Father, Hail Mary, and Glory Be five times

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If any of you have any specific prayer requests and don't think you'll be able to do the novena, please let me know. :)

God bless,

St. Dymphna Novena, Day Four

Day 4: For Piety

God, Our Creator and Supreme Master, St. Dymphna served Thee with great zeal even in her childhood, by hearing Thy word with delight, by assisting at Holy Mass with fervent reverence, and by receiving Holy Communion from the hand of St. Gerebran with tender devotion. Through her intercession we beg Thee to grant us the same virtue of piety so that, having honored Thee during this life as our Creator, we may possess Thee hereafter as our final reward. Through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

Pray the Our Father, Hail Mary, and Glory Be five times

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If any of you have any specific prayer requests and don't think you'll be able to do the novena, please let me know. :)

God bless,

St. Dymphna Novena, Day Two

Day 2: For Hope

Almighty and infinitely good God, Thou hast promised eternal salvation to those who obey Thy commandments and make zealous use of Thy graces. Through the intercession of St. Dymphna, who fled from the danger of sin by leaving the palace of her father, and who, eager to gain eternal salvation, fled to Belgium to live in poverty, we beg Thee to grant that we also, who are striving for eternal happiness, may overcome all obstacles in the way of virtue and may attain eternal salvation. Through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

Pray the Our Father, Hail Mary, and Glory Be five times

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If any of you have any specific prayer requests and don't think you'll be able to do the novena, please let me know. :)

God bless,

St. Dymphna Novena, Day One

Day 1: For Faith

O God, Source of our salvation, in the midst of a pagan people, Thou didst enlighten St. Dymphna by the light of the true faith, which she professed under the guidance of her holy confessor, Gerebran, with such constance that she suffered martyrdom. Through the intercession of these two saints, we beg Thee to strengthen the faith which Thou hast given us, so that by wisely subjecting our souls to Thy Supreme Authority, and by faithfully conforming our lives according to our faith, we may honor Thee with our whole heart and soul until the hour of our death. Through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

Pray the Our Father, Hail Mary, and Glory Be five times.

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If any of you have any specific prayer requests and don't think you'll be able to do the novena, please let me know. :)

God bless,

Lack of Blogging Due to Apathy and Fatigue

Yes, the blog post title pretty much tells you why I haven't blogged in almost a week and a half. I didn't plan it out that way (in fact, I have two blog posts waiting in the wings that I haven't gotten a chance to post) but... I'll explain what happened.

I felt a bit sick last Friday (the day I had planned the next blog post) and I was overwhelmed with school stuff so I took the weekend off to rest. I said to myself "the latest What I Learned Wednesday blog post is pretty solid so no big deal." And then Sunday came along, I missed Mass (anxiety was too crazy for me to drive... and I'm the only one who drives in this house) and I just didn't want to write. Come Monday, I started feeling incredibly apathetic (and fatigued) about everything... prayers, checking things off of my Lenten "to-do" list, etc. I have two theories, which I will share with you because I need to get this out and writing is my outlet.

Theory one: I found out recently that ASHA (American Speech-Language-Hearing Association) got strict with the grad school/certification requirements for future Speech-Language pathologists, which means I have to take three additional classes making my four-class semesters into five-class semesters. The three additional classes: Statistics, Chemistry, and Biology/Anatomy. I'd already been told that the program was intense... and it just got more intense. To top it off, since I graduated with my first B.A. two years ago, I have to take a math placement exam on Monday to hopefully test into Stats. Unfortunately, I took my last math class three years ago so this entire weekend will be spent cramming. I seem to have forgotten almost everything so I'll be doing a boatload of problems to study. My theory is that because of all of this stress (which started about Thursday evening) I've been in "shut down" mode; that means I don't feel like doing anything so I don't. If I feel forced to do something my anxiety gets worse... and I shut down.

And, please, no one say "you just need to trust God" because I am trusting Him and I'm sure that everything will be okay but with my school anxiety the stress still exists. I have to get used to the new plans is all. A "trust in Him" reminder is going on my desk for when I feel really stressed out so, I'm good. No need to say it to me. :)

Theory two: I was doing so well during Lent -- reading the St. Therese book, daily Gospel readings, being on top of my prayers throughout the day, going a while without the need for confession (a personal best for me), doing novenas, etc. -- and then... apathy and fatigue. Again this all hit last Thursday night so Theory One works out... except that it shouldn't have affected my prayer life as bad. Last time I was this stressed out about something, I prayed harder and I wasn't so "ugh, don't want this" about my prayer life. My theory is that someone's not happy that I've had (up until late last week) a very fruitful Lenten season... and I'll give you one guess who that someone is. I've tried really, really hard to keep praying but either I don't get up early enough to do morning prayers (I haven't been able to sleep for days and I wake up almost at noon most days) or I can't concentrate on my prayers and meditations because I'm so mentally (and physically) exhausted. The sudden feeling of overwhelming apathy is a pain and something I haven't felt in years. It's pretty bad but I'm trying. Again, it may just be a form of spiritual attack. I don't know. I just hope I can go to confession tomorrow and to Mass because I haven't been to either in 3 weeks tomorrow. Prayers please?

Anyway, that's why I haven't blogged in days. I was originally just going to stop blogging daily because I felt like the quality of blog posts during Lent was going downhill. It was hard trying to come up with something to write about when I had so many other things to do during the day. Like I said, I did/do have blog post topics listed but haven't had a chance to write them out. I totally had to force myself to write this too because I'm done with letting the apathy win. I didn't want to write (and still) but I'm doing my best.

For the record, if you're wondering, I have caught up with my prayers and my St. Therese book. I was only a few days behind (last Saturday through yesterday) on the book. I'm going to keep at it even though I don't feel like it. I'm trying. It's hard but I'm trying.

And that is it for now. I have to go study math. *groan* Wish me luck... or say a prayer to St. Joseph of Cupertino (patron of exam takers), St. Hubert of Liege (patron of mathematicians), St. Thomas Aquinas (patron of students) or Bl. Pier Giorgio (personal patron for school related things) for me if you can spare one.

As always, thanks for reading and God bless! :D

A Different Take on All Souls Day

No, I am not rewriting what today is. It is still a day on which we commemorate those who have passed as well as those who are currently in Purgatory, waiting to get into Heaven. However, on the way home from the San Fernando Mission Cemetery, where my father is buried, we encountered something that made me think about the importance of the day.

Before I get into that, I just wanted to say: daddy, we still miss you terribly. We're never going to get used to being just the two of us (mom and I) but I know you're in a better place and I thank God that you were able to give the rest of your life to Him before you passed. Big brother, Moises, I never got to meet you but I know you're looking down from Heaven, taking care of mama and I. (Paternal) Grammy, I wish I had known you better. I know I inherited my love and appreciation for Catholicism from you and I thank you for taking me to the humble but beautiful churches in Mexico when I visited. We miss and love you too.

Now... for those of you who aren't from L.A. nor have been to the San Fernando Valley, one of the California Missions is located in Mission Hills. As I said, my father is buried in the cemetery that is next to/part of Mission San Fernando Rey de España. Next to them is Bishop Alemany High School which is, from my understanding, one of the best Catholic high schools in L.A. Anyway, we often drive by there (when we're in the area) and today I was happily surprised to see a number of students with signs that read "Honk for Life" and "Vote Yes on 34." Here are a couple of pictures I took (with permission from the adult supervisor who was outside with them).

I was incredibly impressed with young men and women who were standing outside with these signs... and even more so at the amount of honking from passing cars. Wow. I have never experienced anything like that before. Kudos for being vocal about supporting Prop 34 (which will end the death penalty here in California), BAHS! (FYI: The L.A. Archdiocese has something on their webpage on it as well.)

While thinking about how great it was to see young people being enthusiastic about something they believed in, I thought back about how we, as humans, usually don't think about things like the death penalty. The students from BAHS were supporting life the way God intended -- from the womb to the tomb.

For obvious reasons, I am against the death penalty. When I say I'm pro-life, I mean I'm PRO-LIFE. I think it's horrible to kill people whether they are innocent human beings in their mother's womb or whether they've made mistakes in their lives and have taken the lives of others. If Bl. Pope John Paul II could forgive the man who attempted to assassinate him, why can't we pray for those who have committed horrific crimes? I am not condoning what they've done in any way. I know that losing a loved one hurts, especially when at the hands of someone else, but why must we contribute more hate and/or evil in a world that already sees way too much of it?

So, on this All Souls Day, I am going to pray for ALL the souls -- those who have died, those who are in Purgatory, those who are yet to be born, and those of us who need to get closer to God. I pray that those who have passed will help us learn from their mistakes and that those who are close to God will pray that we may stay on the path to becoming saints one day.

Anyway, just random thoughts that popped into my mind on this day that I wanted to jot down. The little lady I tutor will soon get here so I really should skedaddle.

Hope y'all are having a great week thus far. :D If you have any prayer requests, let me know; I'm a novena machine at the moment.

As always, thanks for reading and God Bless! :D

Infant of Prague FTW!

Can I just say that the Infant of Prague is amazing? I've done the 9 hour novena three times this week (last Sunday, Wednesday, and again yesterday into this morning) because I've had some really, really, really bad days/nights where I felt like I was going to have to be taken to the E.R. but I'm managed to stay okay thus far.

Except for a few moments of "ruh-oh, am I going to faint?" today, I've felt the best I've felt in a week or so. I tried to get a doctor's appointment last week with no luck. I will try again this week. I know the Infant of Prague will hear my prayers (well, the rest of them) in helping me get a doctor's appointment for my stomach problems. :)

Thanks to all who have been praying for me. Two bouts of food poisoning plus existing stomach issues made the last week one of the worst I've had in a while. Your prayers are greatly appreciated and will be returned when I pray the Rosary. :)

Anyway, just wanted to say... Infant of Prague FTW! ;)

Will blog again when I feel a bit better. :D

God bless,



P.S. Also a big shout-out to St. Timothy and all the other saints some of you have been praying to (for their intercessions) for me. St. Timothy's my buddy too. :D