Does Anyone Have Any Oblate Trip Fundraising Ideas?

It's official! I know where I will begin my Oblate novitiate in a couple of months! I'm so very excited!! I had done the St. Benedict novena for his first feast day of the year (March 21st) which ended less than a week ago for this very intention -- a clear sign to where God wanted me if it was His will that I become an Oblate. I also talked to a trusted priest -- who had given me much needed advice -- exactly one week ago. I have no doubt that it was the combo of the prayers of St. Frances of Rome (did a novena to her earlier this month), St. Benedict, our parish priest, my friends (who've been praying for me during the months I've been waiting to hear from the places where I had sent my inquiries) and from you lovely blog readers who might've said a prayer for me following the March 21st post about my impatience and my will vs God's will.

For months, I had been waiting to hear back from the Benedictine monastery where I hope to attach myself to. All that time spent waiting and praying helped me be sure that it was where God wanted me, not where I wanted to go for whatever convenient or selfish reason. There was another monastery I thought I would end up at but, for several reasons, it didn't work out. In hindsight, it was best for me because I think it could've potentially harmed my spiritual life more than helped it.

Now I have the exciting yet partially stressful task of planning the trip to the retreat where I will officially begin my novitiate. I'm excited about it for obvious reasons. This is something I've been praying and waiting for for over a year when I officially began sending inquiries to monasteries. As I've begun to incorporate the Benedictine spirituality and Rule into my life, I've seen so much more peace and purpose in my life. I can see how I'm growing, spirituality, though I never notice it until much later. As excited as I am, I have one big problem: I don't have the savings to make the trip.

As many of you know, it's just my mother and I and has been this way since my father passed away almost 10 years ago. With my health not being the best in recent years, work has been hard to come by since I can currently only work from home. I've had a slight relapse over the winter months (which makes sense; I have a severe vitamin D deficiency I've yet to recover from and it's been mostly rainy and/or cloudy this past winter) which has made even freelance writing difficult. Roughly 85% of my paychecks go towards helping my mother out with keeping the household financially afloat and 13% goes towards my student loan payments. If we have anything left over at the end of the month, it goes towards my savings but it's rare when I can put part of it into savings. Also, after a particularly disastrous financial month this month, my savings also took a hit so I'm left with enough for just one way to the retreat destination.

That's where I need your help: I need help figuring out fundraising ideas. If any of you know of someone who needs a writer, a proofreader, or anything I can do from home, please let me know! In the spirit of the Benedictines, I would like to work for what I earn. Transcribing is too time consuming and doing VIPkid would not work with my own fatigue since I never know when the fatigue will overwhelm me into slumber.

I've had people suggest a GoFundMe but I have nothing other than prayers to offer as a "thank you." I also have my mother's voice in my head, drilling into me (as a child) that I need to work hard for what I want; that I shouldn't take advantage of people by asking for help, even financially. It may be bordering on a pride thing but it's something that I've heard so much over the past 33 years of my life so I feel guilty even thinking about setting up an account.

Right now, I need to save up for the round-trip fare (I have a terrible fear of flying, especially if I'm going by myself, so I'll be looking up both train and flight fares), the $ I'll spend on food during the trip, for the actual retreat, and the car rental fee/Lyft costs when I arrive at my destination. I don't want to say when the trip is or where I'm headed for privacy issues but I do plan on blogging the experience after it happens. I'm also withholding which monastery I'll become a novice with from public knowledge for now, again, due to safety and privacy issues. Once the time of the trip comes, I'll share as many details as I can give. :)

So, does anyone have any ideas or know of anyone who needs a writer or proofreader? Please send me any leads you may have!

Alright, well, that's it for now. I'm going to go try to figure out Amtrak (and flight, gulp) fares and crunch some numbers.

I hope you're all having a lovely start of the week!

As always, thanks for reading and God bless! :)

Unplanned Craziness

Lent has not been easy... and we're only 5 days into it (not counting Sunday).

On Ash Wednesday I was hit with something that had me in bed all day and didn't let me get out of the house until Friday. That means I didn't get ashes... nor did I attend Mass or go to confession. I also hadn't planned on eating chicken on Fridays but my diet is so restricted (I felt terrible on Thursday after unintentionally fasting and getting no protein that day) and I've been sick so I had no choice. I had been looking forward to doing it all "right" but, well, we can't always plan these things to work out in our favor.

From Saturday through Sunday, I traveled. Mom and I went down to San Diego and crossed the border into Tijuana on Saturday. The reason for this was because I had some dental work to be done. We have a family friend who is a dentist and when she heard how much they were charging me (out of pocket) Stateside, she told me to go down and she'd take care of it for me. It turns out I didn't even need one of the root canals the dentists here were pushing... and, really, there was a lot that I thought I needed but didn't actually need. In fact, I didn't even get a single root canal done; she just repaired the chipped molar and did other things that dentists here didn't want to do but were necessary because of how fragile my health has been. (Those were her own words; they were putting me at a greater risk for refusing to fill a big cavity and the chipped molar.) It took us nearly 2 hours just to cross the border (by car) back into the States on Saturday night and then we slept for a couple of hours before we had to get up to get the train back to L.A.

What was supposed to be a day trip turned out to be a 2-day trip because we didn't want to get home after 1 a.m. on Sunday. Two women by themselves, in our part of the county? Um, no, thank you. I'm grateful for Amtrak because I only slept 2 hours on Saturday and 6 on Sunday. Being able to sleep on the train was lovely, even if my neck was hating me at the end of both trips. Also, because of the change of plans, we ended up missing Mass yesterday. We arrived home around 10 a.m. but I crashed after I ate breakfast. I hadn't eaten well on Saturday (and only had about half of the daily recommended water intake) so my body (still recovering from the cold and what hit on Wednesday) needed to crash. Even for evening Mass, I wasn't sure if I would've been okay to drive with my slight lightheadedness and my new toothache (which lasted about 36 hours). I kept drifting in and out of sleep for most of yesterday. I think I may need all of this week for my body and mind to recover. It's an INFP and/or HSP thing, I'm sure.

In between all of that crazy, I failed to pray the Saturday morning prayers in the Little Office and the chaplet of the Divine Mercy before the day ended. I actually fell asleep while praying the last decade of the Rosary on Saturday night. I've also failed to do any of the meditations in my Blessed is She prayer journal... and doing any reading in either Introduction to the Devout Life or Roses Among Thorns, both by St. Francis de Sales.

I've done okay with staying off social media, with the exception being yesterday when I had to log into Facebook to change my password because someone else had logged into it and on Saturday afternoon when I logged into Instagram just to get that location stamp stating that I was at the U.S.-Mexico International Border. I didn't check anything else; I simply changed the password for FB and logged out of Instagram once I had the location stamp on it. I do miss social media, especially Instagram, but I've been able to do a lot without getting lost in the scrolling.

As for giving up talking, it's been hit and miss. I hope that it'll be better now that I'm on Spring Break (early, I know) and the craziness of the trip and having to study for this past weekend's exam (I passed despite only studying for less than a day!) has passed. We do have something special planned this weekend (our young adult group is doing something lovely for Lent) and I know that these people all inspire me to be more mindful of what I say so it'll be good for me.

Do any of you have a hard time getting back on track when your plans get super derailed like mine did over the past couple of days? If so, any tips on what could help get it back on track? I've been struggling with studying (seriously, I had only 1 day to study and memorize for Saturday's exam over the course of 3 weeks due to a number of things that popped up) and now I'm struggling with simply taking some time to pray during the day. Hopefully, I can figure out something during this week of "vacation"... though I don't know how much I'll actually rest because the end of the week is looking crazy busy again. Honestly, sometimes I think God is saying "No, you're still doing too much. Slow down and take care of yourself" when I get this busy.

Anyway, I should get going. I'm still feeling a bit lightheaded (not sure if it's lack of fluids, too much sleep, or an effect from Saturday's dinner when they accidentally added cheese to my plate... after I had explained that I was allergic) and I want to rest for a little while in hopes that I'm well enough to go pick up Mom from work a little later.

I hope y'all are having a good Lent thus far!

As always, thanks for reading and God bless! :D

Summer, Already?; Princess Diaries series; Upcoming Plans.

It's summer! Wait... no, it's not! Well, it certainly feels like summer in Los Angeles. It's currently 81 degrees (Fahrenheit). It will be in the lower 80s, upper 70s for the next couple of days. That means I won't be indoors too much. I love this kind of weather. My ideal temperature is around 74 degrees with a slight breeze. It's a bit windy for it to be my ideal but it's not far off.

Unfortunately, this is also what we call earthquake weather. We actually already had one a few days ago. It wasn't too major (just a 5.0 on the Richter scale) but it was enough to spook people. I personally didn't feel it because I was standing at the time it happened, but I did see the chandelier in the kitchen sway. I'm so glad I didn't feel it, though I tend to feel rather brave during earthquakes. Seriously. I have a "take charge/make sure everything's in order" attitude when there's a crisis or something major going on... but not when there's nothing going on. *shrugs* I'm a weird one.

Anyway, not much going on with me the last couple of days... which is why there hasn't been an update. I've been reading, writing, watching movies, and am about to spend some time with my leading man (the one in the novel) because I only have a few more weeks left of Winter break. I should get everything sorted by the time I start the Spring semester. I don't want to go back to school without not having worked on Will because he's going to be the character that will be the most difficult to write.

And speaking of characters and books, I have FINALLY read the last book in the Princess Diaries series. Go ahead and laugh if you must. Yes, I've read (and collected) every book in the series. I started reading them when I was still a teenager and it's taken me nearly a decade to be done with them (only because the final book was just released). I started reading them when I was a teenager and finished at nearly 24 years-old. Scary! The books started off pretty tame but this last one... wow. NOT something I'd recommend my little sister to read (so please don't, Delaney!), or, really, anyone under 18. I don't even want my other younger sister, DJ, who's 19, to read them. The books got more and more adult as the series progressed. I'm sure it's no big deal to those who are liberal but to those who are conservative, or even moderate-conservative (as I am), will have issues with certain things that are brought up in the books. Catholics will DEFINITELY dislike these books for the casual mention of different types of birth control, premarital sex (and quite a bit of that), and other things. The only reasons why I continued reading the books, 'til the end, was because I'd already invested so much money and time into the books that I wanted to see how it ended. Also, I owe Meg Cabot (the author) a lot. I met her a few years ago and she was very nice. She sent me a letter a day (or two) after I met her, which really changed my confidence and outlook -- for the better. Doesn't mean I agree with what happened with the characters and with certain scenes. It's definitely not pro-abstinence, that's for sure. It also makes me sad... if it's an actual representation of how teenagers are, and what they think now-a-days. I also know what NOT to write in my novel. Not that I ever would, but now I have a better, clearer vision when it comes to what I'm writing.

Anyway, I won't keep boring you guys any longer so I have a few things to say. If things come up -- either with me or with something important that needs to be written about concerning Catholicism -- I will definitely write often. If not, the posts will be a bit irregular for the next couple of weeks. Not only am I going to working on my novel, I will also be making travel plans. Corey and Liam from the Irish Fireside are coming to Los Angeles and I've already made sure I will be able to meet up with them (by securing a ride since I don't have my license). I will also (hopefully) meet up with Rebecca from Modestia and Catholic in Film School in the next couple of weeks for a few Catholic events. Fingers crossed for that. After that, I start school... but not before I make some serious plans for traveling abroad during Spring Break. I won't say where I'm going BUT I will say that quite a number of readers are from that country. :D So, now y'all know just in case I go long periods without an update. :D

Oh, btw, a BIG thank you to God Fanboy for the sweet shout out he left me on his blog. Seriously, THANK YOU! It makes me happy to know that others actually enjoy this blog. :D

Okay, well, I guess that's it. :D I am going to enjoy the rest of the summer-like day with my British leading gentleman. What I can I say, I'm a sucker for accents. Haha! As always, thanks for reading and God Bless. :D
.

I Can Finally Breathe!; Patron Saints; Bon Voyage... But Where To?

I finally feel like I can breathe after weeks of being swamped with so much homework. Whoo!! :D The heaviest parts were finished yesterday. I have to write myself a note not to overload myself like this again. I haven't had time to go get my hair cut. I haven't gone out with my friends in ages. I'm very much a homebody. I mean, I was a homebody before but now I can't even go out if I wanted to. Well, no, I CAN go out but I choose not to because that will only lead to more stress and who wants that? I'm perfectly content staying at home, studying, because I know I will get killer grades at the end of the semester if I keep it up. :) One of my courses, the dreaded Oceanography class, ends in 3 weeks (wow, so fast!) and then I have 3 classes for the remainder of the semester. Say it with me... WHOOOOOO!!! lol. I truly hope that those of you in school are doing well so far. :D

Of course, I owe a lot of my calm nerves to the patron saints of students (St. Joseph of Cupertino and St. Thomas Aquinas) and of course, St. Dymphna (patroness of anxiety). I'm happy to say that the anxiety has been practically gone in the past couple of weeks, perhaps last 2 months. I asked a friend of mine if it was possible to have too many patron saints, and he didn't know so... hmm. I'm still wondering. No one's been able to give me a straight answer yet. I can't pick a patron saint. I have three main saints: St. Jude Thaddeus, St. Dymphna, and Our Blessed Mother. How can I pick when they've done so much for me? I should probably ask one of the priests -- the priest I get -- when I go sometime soon. I still have to go and talk to one of them. I have a lot on my mind. I have so many questions and am in dire need of the kind of advice I think a priest would answer the best. Is it weird that I love having conversations with priests? Seriously, if I could on a daily basis, I would!

Oh... A few months ago, my mother surprised me by saying that as soon as my anxiety had simmered down and as soon as I could prove that I can handle traveling, she'd be willing to pay for a vacation anywhere I'd like to go. I've already gone out of the country but not too far away from home. Everyone's pretty much banking (slang word for: betting on a sure deal) on me going to England. Two years ago, England felt more like my home than my actual home here in California. I have so many wonderful memories from that time in my life. I became addicted to tea during that time; an addiction I still have. lol. I have friends in London and up in Manchester so I wouldn't be by myself while in England. Maybe I'll skip the trip and save up the money for something else in the future. With the way the economy is going, it might be wiser to just save up. We'll see.

Alright, I am going to go shut my eyes for a little while because my eyes hurt and they've gotten worse on a daily basis. I think I need new prescription for my glasses/contacts because I feel better without them on... even though I'm pretty much as blind as a bat without them. lol. I think a prayer to St. Lucy is in order.

Oh, and before I go... I still have plans on writing about St. Therese of Lisieux AND about the golden crucifix dream but I am going to wait until (hopefully) tomorrow because I want to add more to it. :D

I'm going to leave y'all with a video I came across youtube of my favorite scene of "The Bells of St. Mary's". Enjoy! As always, thanks for reading and God Bless. :D


.

A Little Update

Oh, my lovely dears, Miss C.N.W. has not been well lately. After an amazing day last Sunday, my health has declined and it stinks. It's not even just me... it's my mother as well. My mom has acute tonsillitis which has made her miserable. I don't exactly know what's wrong with me but it's no doubt something anxiety related. I've been very weak (I can't really walk and I feel like passing out most of the day). My anxiety's gone up a lot lately... but it's more of a type of depression because the water works have been opened almost daily and I've gone through a lot of tissues. It stinks. I missed Mass today because I don't feel like I can stand up and walk long enough to make it through the entire Mass (not to mention that I had a mini sob-fest/anxiety thing a few minutes before we had to leave for Mass). Ugh. What I hate more than being sick is missing Mass. :(

As you might have guessed, I missed one of my weekend trips. I was able to make one of them on Friday but it was a day trip so it wasn't too bad. I did NOT have fun though... unless lack of sleep, lack of food, panic attacks, crazy hot weather, and the notoriously bad Southern California traffic is your idea of fun. lol. We're going to wait until both my mom and I are well enough to go on the second one and visit her family in her home country... well, the home country of her family's (my mom's technically American). I'm definitely looking forward to that.

I don't know when I'll be able to come back online and write a legit blog. Hopefully I'll get better soon. I'm sure all my prayers to Our Lady of Guadalupe will be answered. Actually, I'm sure of it. I asked her to give me anxiety (which I didn't have for a long while) in exchange for my mom's health... and I've been getting more anxious as my mom's been getting better. I got a lecture from my mom not to do that again. (Yes, even at 23, my parents -- as well as my older brother -- feel the need to give me lectures). Oops. lol. Hey, it's worth it because I, at least, know that what I get is anxiety and I am so used to it, I can handle it.

I hope everyone is doing well. :D Don't worry about me, sooner or later I will get better; a giddy, happy, healthy me is a fearsome thing to behold. Y'all have been warned. lol. I'm not too worried about being sick because I've placed myself in God's hands and know He will take care of me. :D Whooo! lol. :D

Alright, I think I need a nap because I'm starting to feel a little lightheaded and kind of loopy. Oh yeah, great fun. lol. As always, thanks for reading and God Bless.

P.S. A happy 23rd birthday to one of my best girl friends and a happy 25th birthday to one of the nicest guys I've ever met!! :D
.

No Sleep, Dreams, Trips, and Santo Niño de Atocha.

I am EXHAUSTED. I've slept less than 4 hours in the past 35 hours and I don't know how I am still up. I was sure I would've been passed out by now but, for some reason, I still have enough energy to write this blog and do a few other things before bed. I would've slept well if the painters hadn't shown up, unannounced, ready to paint my bathroom. They've been saying they were going to do it for weeks now but they picked the ONE day I went to sleep at 6 a.m. (seriously, I was up until 6 a.m. this morning) to come and disturb me. The first thing that came out of my mouth after my dad woke me up was "Son of a Biscuit!" which means "Darn it!" when I say it. lol. I tried falling asleep on the couch but that didn't work. I've been up since. Oy. lol. I just yawned too. lol. Great. :D

I had a very brief dream this morning where I was chatting with St. Teresa of Avila (or at least that's what I think it was), which was awesome. I think that's because I read a bit of her biography before bed. Still, I love saint dreams. What I don't like are bummer dreams. Two nights ago I had a dream that I was wearing black because I was mourning someone's death. Unfortunately, a death has occurred in real life. This little old lady that "adopted" my mom passed away this morning. My mother works in a hospital and the lady was a patient there. She was the sweetest lady. I used to stop and chat with her when I used to go visit my mom at work. She always asked my mom how I was, too, so the news of her passing is very sad. We weren't close but still, she was sweet and she loved my mother an awful lot. *sigh* Rest in Peace, Ms. Ursula.

Trying to not think about sadness... I will be taking a trip this weekend, which is exciting and nerve-wrecking because this is my first trip out of the country since I became sick. I will be praying that everything goes well because I'm very nervous about potentially getting sick. St. Christopher is the patron saint of travelers, right? I will have to ask him to help make the trip a smooth one.

I'm about to crash (I can feel my eyelids getting droopier and droopier) so I'm going to post some of the Santo Niño de Atocha items my paternal grandmother gave me when we went to Plateros and also other things she sent afterwards.

I received this framed picture from her, which is next to her picture in my room.



A night light she got in Plateros that was a perfect gift for me because I used to be afraid of the dark when I was younger.



And just for kicks... a quiz I did when I was bored, earlier today.

Your Personality is Very Rare (INFP)

Your personality type is dreamy, romantic, elegant, and expressive. Only about 5% of all people have your personality, including 6% of all women and 4% of all men You are Introverted, Intuitive, Feeling, and Perceiving.

How Rare Is Your Personality?

Alright, well, I have to go do a couple of things before I can call it a night. I have a feeling I will fall asleep the minute my head hits the pillow, which is rare for me. lol. Until next time, thanks for reading and God Bless.