My 2019 Lenten Plans... Along with a Few Surprises

I have decided to become somewhat of an "urban hermit" for this Lenten season. What does that mean? Well, in a nutshell, I want to devote myself and my time to more prayer and work (oh, hey, Benedictine ways ;)). I want to detach myself from as many worldly distractions as possible. This means no social media, checking my email twice a day (and not replying unless it's
life or death" important), long periods of not touching my laptop or anything that has internet capabilities, and seriously detachment from my smartphone and all the shiny apps it contains.

I will be rolling out the details of my plans slowly as the Lenten season progresses. You won't know what I'm doing until I've begun doing them, but here are the three major things that I needed to share with everyone with whom I communicate frequently.

I will be "breaking up" with my smartphone over a period of 30-days, which may extend a bit after Lent is over. I have the specific time frame already marked in my calendar. Friends have been warned that I will be unavailable and alternative ways of communicating have been established for those who want (really, need; e.g. editors, coworkers) to keep in touch during this time.

I am planning on doing a mini-retreat at home. I'll talk more about this when I begin but it's something that I've looked forward to doing on my own for quite some time. I want and need this time for just myself and for my relationship with God -- with no one else's comments or interference. It'll just be whatever God wants to reveal to me and what I want/need to say to him. People often feel the need to chime in on what I "have to" do or how I "have to" do it and, to be completely honest, it irritates me. My relationship with God is personal. Sure, I know I need help once in a while but that's what spiritual directors are for, right? I hope this retreat will help me focus more on God and less on what the outside world thinks I should do to better my spiritual life. Are we seeing the "urban hermit" pattern yet?

I will be updating my progress daily via this blog. No, your eyes don't deceive you; I will be blogging daily during Lent. I will be setting a specific time in the evening, every day, to update any progress (or epic fails) along the way. I've always been curious to see how people do when they cut back on social media and smartphone usage after relying on them for so long so I want to share my experience with you. Knowing myself, I will stumble more than a couple of times but that's okay. I'm giving myself permission to not be perfect; to learn from my mistakes but to also not say, "Well, I messed up so it's time to throw in the towel." Also, it'll hold me accountable for my actions, which I need.

There may also be surprises along the way but I guess you'll just have to keep coming back to find out what they are. ;)

I think I've figured out how to share these blog posts and articles published onto my social media accounts without my having to log in so some of y'all can still get the links if it's easier that way. However, I will be completely gone from the evening of Shrove Tuesday until Easter Sunday. Yes, that includes Sundays as well.

I know some of what I will share (as I roll out my plans) will seem extreme at first but, trust me, I've not only researched and planned this out for weeks. I'm doing all of this because I know I have to make some drastic changes in my life in order to put myself back on the right path. I'll also share what's been going on and why these changes were necessary later on.

Anyway, I just wanted to share these things while I had the brain capacity for them. I'm currently having another (and slightly worse than before) chronic fatigue relapse so I'm not able to concentrate for long periods of time. In fact, I'm going to take a nap as soon as I publish this post so I can focus on a couple of articles I have due (and overdue) without the crazy mental fog.

I hope you're all having a lovely start of the week thus far!

As always, thanks for reading and God bless! :)

An Unsettling Peace

Have you ever prayed arduously about a certain intention -- it could be for days, weeks, months, or years -- and when you finally figure out what you have to do, you are both unsettled and at peace? In other words, you get a sense of peace whenever you think about what you've figured out -- what you think may be the path God wants you to take -- but it also unsettles you because it means facing a lot of changes, fears, and uncertainties? 

Now imagine that... and multiply it by about 20. That means clarity on not just one intention but on several intentions that you've prayed about for years. That's the boat I'm in right now. Some of the intentions are not mine but have been intentions people have entrusted me with over the years. I think one of them has been an on-going intention for a minimum of 5 years. As for my own intentions, all but one or two seem to have been answered lately and it's making me a little nervous.

Why am I nervous? Well, because it means I have to make a lot of changes, face a lot of fears and uncertainties. I've already made some of the easier changes (which I hope to blog about soon) and I've already noticed a massive improvement in two areas of my life. I occasionally slip as the habits will take some time to solidify but I'm happy with the results thus far. The more difficult changes will happen when I fully return to social media on Easter Sunday, when I come out of my self-exile/retreat from having a social life (only did it for Lent), and in some of the other (hint: ninja status) areas of my life that involve other people. 

Sometimes I wonder if I have the (emotional/physical/mental/spiritual) strength to make these changes. I've already tried to implement some of the changes during Lent... and failed miserably because the temptations and the curiosity got the best of me a couple of times. I know that Lent isn't about making personal changes -- like New Year's resolutions -- but these changes will ultimately help my relationship with God and my spiritual life. In fact, every single change I'm going to make will strengthen that relationship. Every fear I will face and every uncertainty that will come from the decisions I will make will force me to trust God. You know that internal dialogue I shared in the last blog post? That will continue to happen and, I suspect, it'll happen more often. 

Some of the decisions I've made and have yet to implement will make a lot of people unhappy with me. Some will draw criticism and harsh judgment. Some of the decisions made (and decisions I have yet to make as I have yet to receive clarity of them) will surprise people. "I thought I knew her," I can already hear some people say. One particular decision (which I'm still praying about) may even shock those who've known me for years and who've known about my thoughts about this particular topic. Still, I know that I can't be afraid to make these changes... especially since I will be doing what I believe God is calling me to do.

Will I shed some tears along the way? Most likely as I'm naturally sensitive. Will my people-pleasing ways make me feel awful, especially when people try to emotionally manipulate me or make me feel bad about the decisions I've made? Ohh yes. I'm counting on it. I'm going to have to rely a lot on God -- to trust Him, to remember what's at stake, and remind myself that He will give me the strength and graces necessary to face whatever is coming my way if it's part of His plans for me.

Sorry to be a bit vague about things now but, stick around! I'll definitely plan on sharing a good number of these changes as they happen if only to hold myself accountable to them whenever I slip.

Alright, I should go have a late lunch; I haven't eaten much today and I really need to take what I hope will make a difference in my health. :)

I hope y'all have a blessed Paschal Triduum (I don't plan on blogging until Easter Sunday)! You may actually see me on Twitter before you get a blog post. We'll see. ;)

As always, thanks for reading and God bless! :D

Happy Easter!

Hey y'all! Just a quick post to wish y'all a Happy Easter! Alleluia! He is Risen! :D

While I was trying to drift off to sleep last night, I had a very interesting thought pop up: why do we make a big deal out of the Resurrection for just a day (or a week, for us Catholics) and then we sort of forget to celebrate and/or meditate on it until the following year? Why don't we keep that in mind during the entire year, during times of hardship? Just some food for thought on this glorious (but cloudy, at least in my part of L.A.) day. ;)

Anyway, leaving y'all with the "Hallelujah Chorus" from Handel's Messiah as sung by the Royal Choral Society in the UK. It's been playing in my mind since last night because I've been so excited for today. ;)



Have a blessed Easter Sunday. I should be back to posting tomorrow or Tuesday at the latest. :)

As always, thanks for reading and God bless! :D

Divine Mercy Novena, Day Nine

Ninth Day

"Today bring to Me the Souls who have become Lukewarm,

and immerse them in the abyss of My mercy. These souls wound My Heart most painfully. My soul suffered the most dreadful loathing in the Garden of Olives because of lukewarm souls. They were the reason I cried out: 'Father, take this cup away from Me, if it be Your will.' For them, the last hope of salvation is to run to My mercy." 

Most compassionate Jesus, You are Compassion Itself. I bring lukewarm souls into the abode of Your Most Compassionate Heart. In this fire of Your pure love, let these tepid souls who, like corpses, filled You with such deep loathing, be once again set aflame. O Most Compassionate Jesus, exercise the omnipotence of Your mercy and draw them into the very ardor of Your love, and bestow upon them the gift of holy love, for nothing is beyond Your power.

Eternal Father, turn Your merciful gaze upon lukewarm souls who are nonetheless enfolded in the Most Compassionate Heart of Jesus. Father of Mercy, I beg You by the bitter Passion of Your Son and by His three-hour agony on the Cross: Let them, too, glorify the abyss of Your mercy. Amen. 

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Divine Mercy Novena, Day Eight

Eighth Day
"Today bring to Me the Souls who are in the prison of Purgatory,

and immerse them in the abyss of My mercy. Let the torrents of My Blood cool down their scorching flames. All these souls are greatly loved by Me. They are making retribution to My justice. It is in your power to bring them relief. Draw all the indulgences from the treasury of My Church and offer them on their behalf. Oh, if you only knew the torments they suffer, you would continually offer for them the alms of the spirit and pay off their debt to My justice."  

Most Merciful Jesus, You Yourself have said that You desire mercy; so I bring into the abode of Your Most Compassionate Heart the souls in Purgatory, souls who are very dear to You, and yet, who must make retribution to Your justice. May the streams of Blood and Water which gushed forth from Your Heart put out the flames of Purgatory, that there, too, the power of Your mercy may be celebrated.

Eternal Father, turn Your merciful gaze upon the souls suffering in Purgatory, who are enfolded in the Most Compassionate Heart of Jesus. I beg You, by the sorrowful Passion of Jesus Your Son, and by all the bitterness with which His most sacred Soul was flooded: Manifest Your mercy to the souls who are under Your just scrutiny. Look upon them in no other way but only through the Wounds of Jesus, Your dearly beloved Son; for we firmly believe that there is no limit to Your goodness and compassion. Amen.

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Divine Mercy Novena, Day Seven

Seventh Day
Today bring to Me the Souls who especially venerate and glorify My Mercy*,

and immerse them in My mercy. These souls sorrowed most over my Passion and entered most deeply into My spirit. They are living images of My Compassionate Heart. These souls will shine with a special brightness in the next life. Not one of them will go into the fire of hell. I shall particularly defend each one of them at the hour of death.

Most Merciful Jesus, whose Heart is Love Itself, receive into the abode of Your Most Compassionate Heart the souls of those who particularly extol and venerate the greatness of Your mercy. These souls are mighty with the very power of God Himself. In the midst of all afflictions and adversities they go forward, confident of Your mercy; and united to You, O Jesus, they carry all mankind on their shoulders. These souls will not be judged severely, but Your mercy will embrace them as they depart from this life.

Eternal Father, turn Your merciful gaze upon the souls who glorify and venerate Your greatest attribute, that of Your fathomless mercy, and who are enclosed in the Most Compassionate Heart of Jesus. These souls are a living Gospel; their hands are full of deeds of mercy, and their hearts, overflowing with joy, sing a canticle of mercy to You, O Most High! I beg You O God:

Show them Your mercy according to the hope and trust they have placed in You. Let there be accomplished in them the promise of Jesus, who said to them that during their life, but especially at the hour of death, the souls who will venerate this fathomless mercy of His, He, Himself, will defend as His glory. Amen.

*The text leads one to conclude that in the first prayer directed to Jesus, Who is the Redeemer, it is "victim" souls and contemplatives that are being prayed for; those persons, that is, that voluntarily offered themselves to God for the salvation of their neighbor (see Col 1:24; 2 Cor 4:12). This explains their close union with the Savior and the extraordinary efficacy that their invisible activity has for others. In the second prayer, directed to the Father from whom comes "every worthwhile gift and every genuine benefit,"we recommend the "active" souls, who promote devotion to The Divine Mercy and exercise with it all the other works that lend themselves to the spiritual and material uplifting of their brethren.

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Divine Mercy Novena, Day Six

Sixth Day
Today bring to Me the Meek and Humble Souls and the Souls of  Little Children,

and immerse them in My mercy. These souls most closely resemble My Heart. They strengthened Me during My bitter agony. I saw them as earthly Angels, who will keep vigil at My altars. I pour out upon them whole torrents of grace. I favor humble souls with My confidence.  

Most Merciful Jesus, You yourself have said, "Learn from Me for I am meek and humble of heart." Receive into the abode of Your Most Compassionate Heart all meek and humble souls and the souls of little children. These souls send all heaven into ecstasy and they are the heavenly Father's favorites. They are a sweet-smelling bouquet before the throne of God; God Himself takes delight in their fragrance. These souls have a permanent abode in Your Most Compassionate Heart, O Jesus, and they unceasingly sing out a hymn of love and mercy.

Eternal Father, turn Your merciful gaze upon meek souls, upon humble souls, and upon little children who are enfolded in the abode which is the Most Compassionate Heart of Jesus. These souls bear the closest resemblance to Your Son. Their fragrance rises from the earth and reaches Your very throne. Father of mercy and of all goodness, I beg You by the love You bear these souls and by the delight You take in them: Bless the whole world, that all souls together may sing out the praises of Your mercy for endless ages. Amen.

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Divine Mercy Novena, Day Five

Fifth Day
"Today bring to Me the Souls of those who have separated themselves from My Church*,

and immerse them in the ocean of My mercy. During My bitter Passion they tore at My Body and Heart, that is, My Church. As they return to unity with the Church My wounds heal and in this way they alleviate My Passion."  

Most Merciful Jesus, Goodness Itself, You do not refuse light to those who seek it of You. Receive into the abode of Your Most Compassionate Heart the souls of those who have separated themselves from Your Church. Draw them by Your light into the unity of the Church, and do not let them escape from the abode of Your Most Compassionate Heart; but bring it about that they, too, come to glorify the generosity of Your mercy.

Eternal Father, turn Your merciful gaze upon the souls of those who have separated themselves from Your Son's Church, who have squandered Your blessings and misused Your graces by obstinately persisting in their errors. Do not look upon their errors, but upon the love of Your own Son and upon His bitter Passion, which He underwent for their sake, since they, too, are enclosed in His Most Compassionate Heart. Bring it about that they also may glorify Your great mercy for endless ages. Amen.

*Our Lord's original words here were "heretics and schismatics," since He spoke to Saint Faustina within the context of her times. As of the Second Vatican Council, Church authorities have seen fit not to use those designations in accordance with the explanation given in the Council's Decree on Ecumenism (n.3). Every pope since the Council has reaffirmed that usage. Saint Faustina herself, her heart always in harmony with the mind of the Church, most certainly would have agreed. When at one time, because of the decisions of her superiors and father confessor, she was not able to execute Our Lord's inspirations and orders, she declared: "I will follow Your will insofar as You will permit me to do so through Your representative. O my Jesus " I give priority to the voice of the Church over the voice with which You speak to me" (497). The Lord confirmed her action and praised her for it.


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Divine Mercy Novena, Day Four

Fourth Day
"Today bring to Me those who do not believe in God and those who do not know Me,

I was thinking also of them during My bitter Passion, and their future zeal comforted My Heart. Immerse them in the ocean of My mercy."

Most compassionate Jesus, You are the Light of the whole world. Receive into the abode of Your Most Compassionate Heart the souls of those who do not believe in God and of those who as yet do not know You. Let the rays of Your grace enlighten them that they, too, together with us, may extol Your wonderful mercy; and do not let them escape from the abode which is Your Most Compassionate Heart.

Eternal Father, turn Your merciful gaze upon the souls of those who do not believe in You, and of those who as yet do not know You, but who are enclosed in the Most Compassionate Heart of Jesus. Draw them to the light of the Gospel. These souls do not know what great happiness it is to love You. Grant that they, too, may extol the generosity of Your mercy for endless ages. Amen.

*Our Lord's original words here were "the pagans." Since the pontificate of Pope John XXIII, the Church has seen fit to replace this term with clearer and more appropriate terminology.

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Divine Mercy Novena, Day Three

Third Day
"Today bring to Me all Devout and Faithful Souls,

and immerse them in the ocean of My mercy. These souls brought me consolation on the Way of the Cross. They were a drop of consolation in the midst of an ocean of bitterness."

Most Merciful Jesus, from the treasury of Your mercy, You impart Your graces in great abundance to each and all. Receive us into the abode of Your Most Compassionate Heart and never let us escape from It. We beg this grace of You by that most wondrous love for the heavenly Father with which Your Heart burns so fiercely.

Eternal Father, turn Your merciful gaze upon faithful souls, as upon the inheritance of Your Son. For the sake of His sorrowful Passion, grant them Your blessing and surround them with Your constant protection. Thus may they never fail in love or lose the treasure of the holy faith, but rather, with all the hosts of Angels and Saints, may they glorify Your boundless mercy for endless ages. Amen.

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Rosary in the E.R., Panic in Mass, Novel, and The Miracle of Our Lady of Fatima.

Where to begin? So much has gone on since the last blog (hence the long gap between blogs) that I don't even know where to begin. I guess I should start with more recent things and work my way back a bit.

Yesterday, on one of my favorite unofficial holidays (April Fool's), I was taken to the E.R. because they wouldn't see me at my regular doctor's. It was so dumb! They said I had to go to the emergency room because I couldn't breathe and haven't been able to for about a week. I have a feeling it's allergies but they didn't want to take a chance. So I was there for 13 hours (from 3 p.m. until 4:15 a.m. the next day) for them to tell me it is anxiety attack. Okay, so... if it's an anxiety attack, why do I have it 24/7 (yes, all day, all the time)? Why is my nose a bit stuffy? Why am I a bit fatigued? Why do I feel like I'm going to cough? Obviously, the allergy symptoms must mean I have been having a week long anxiety attack. (And, I must apologize for that bit of sarcasm). I'm just really upset that they made me wait for that long, and they didn't even check me properly. They did two EKGs and chest x-rays to make sure it wasn't a heart attack. I mentioned to the doctor that I thought it was allergies and wanted a test and he basically ignored me and said it was all anxiety. Ugh. That is one thing I will always worry about -- doctors using my anxiety as a cop-out to not properly check me. That's what they have been doing lately, too. That's why my therapist is going to talk to my doctor, to get me tested for different things including allergies, so they can honestly rule those things out and say that it is anxiety. It's totally horrible to feel like everyone thinks you're making things up in your mind once they find out you have anxiety. It's absolutely frustrating. I cursed a bit while in the E.R. (words that have been foreign from my vocabulary somehow found their way out of my mouth), I unintentionally said God's name in vain and I just felt horrible that those things had come out of my mouth. Ugh. I pray to God that if I ever have to go back to that hospital, that I am seen by someone else and get through quicker because the entire experience sucked.

Another thing that upset me -- they gave me a pregnancy test (without me knowing it) even after I'd repeatedly said that there was absolutely no way I could be pregnant. Did they think I was just saying that to be funny? I thought they'd given me the test to see if everything was alright elsewhere and when the doctor said "Well, your pregnancy test came back negative" I was just really ticked off. I even said (pretty bluntly) that there was no way someone who is waiting until marriage (and isn't married) to be pregnant. I was absolutely not happy with how I was treated. This is something I will be talking about in therapy because I still have some issues with everything.

One thing I managed to do, though not too well, was pray and say the rosary in the E.R. waiting room. I was interrupted a couple of times but I tried super hard to concentrate on the Glorious Mysteries and I think I did fairly well considering where I was and what was going on around me. I also owe a big part of keeping somewhat sane in those wee hours of the day to Our Lady of Guadalupe who I prayed to for help because I had started to feel shaky and just horrible. Lack of sleep and lack of food is a dangerous combination for me... especially the lack of food part because I need to eat every couple of hours. I totally thought of St. Jude, St. Dymphna and St. Teresa of Avila while I was there. It really helped me not focus on the really bad things that were happening around me.

Oh man... I just got a pain in my lower right side of my stomach. I actually started getting these stabbing pains in this particular spot yesterday at the E.R. and they come and go at the most random times... like now. It feels like a small knife, or something sharp, is poking you every couple of seconds... it's so horrible. Okay, well... sorry for that little interlude, sometimes I just write as I think.

So, before all of that E.R. madness (the day before, actually) I had some issues with going to Mass. See, every weekend is completely weird because I never know how I will be in terms of anxiety. Easter weekend was amazing because not only was I able to make it through the entire mass, but Fr. Leo congratulated me for making it through the Mass. It was a real feat for me to do it. Last weekend, we had to look for another parish because my parents wanted to go shopping (that is something I will write about in an upcoming blog) and apparently my English Mass was getting in the way of it. So I said, fine, I'd find a parish that offered English Mass closer to where they wanted to go shopping (after me getting really upset about that whole deal). On our way to the parish, I got a massive panic attack. I couldn't breathe because I was stuffed up and then I just felt like I was going to completely stop breathing. (Side note: I've gone through enough panic attacks to distinguish them from other things... which is why I am set that I currently have allergies.) So that prevented me from attending Mass and I was just completely bummed out for the rest of the day. I hate missing Mass because a) it's a mortal sin -- and I know I'm excused because I'm sick but still and b) because I feel like I'm being extremely disrespectful towards God, Jesus, Our Mother (Mary), and everyone else. I am hoping that I will be able to make it through Mass this Sunday... and I can't wait for confessions on Saturday because I feel absolutely horrible having sins hanging over me. I'd been very good about not committing any and then all this crummy stuff happened and there goes my hard work. :(

Okay, no longer dwelling on the bad...

My novel is going a lot better than I expected. It's taken a different (better!) direction and I'm so excited. Hopefully I'll be able to keep the creativity flowing while I can because you never know when the dreaded writer's block will hit. I will say that writing about a member of the opposite sex is quite hard. Though I have 4 older brothers, I didn't grow up with them so I have no idea what it is to live with a young man. I hang out with my guy friends more than I do with my girl friends but each guy is different and I still don't get half of the things they do or what makes them say certain things. I am basing the male lead in the novel on a real life person but I'm making the character quite a bit different than the real life person. The dialog will probably be the hardest thing because I don't want to make him sound too robotic or too "girly" (as a guy friend once called a character I'd written when I was in my teens). The fun challenges of writing a book. :D

Another fun thing... watching The Miracle of Our Lady of Fatima on DVD. I'd had it for a bit at home and I finally watched it a few nights ago. I actually liked it, as did my mom. I read that Sr. Lucia (who saw the apparitions of Our Lady with her cousins) didn't like the film but that's understandable. A fictional character (Hugo) was added. The time line didn't follow the real life one (I believe Sr. Lucia had done her first communion years before the apparitions started and in the film, it happened after the first apparition). Lucia's mother in the DVD was reportedly much nicer than the real life mother, and she didn't believe in the apparitions while the movie one did at the end. It was little things like that that didn't make the film a 100% accurate account but I can't help but still like the film. I thought the actors did a great job. If you're not the kind of person to be bothered with differences, I'd recommend you watch it.

Alright, well it's almost half past midnight and I have an early day later so I should end the blog for now. Hopefully I can write more often this month. :D As always, thanks for reading and God Bless. :D

Good Friday, Fr. Leo and St. Teresa of Avila, and Old Friends.

Happy Good Friday to all! I hope everyone who wasn't stuck at home (like me) had a chance to attend Mass today or at least thought of what today symbolized. I, unfortunately, didn't get a chance to get out today but I did spend (and will spend more) time contemplating about what the meaning of Lent is and why Easter is a great day. It's actually one of my favorite "holidays". Because I am a bit out of it today (lack of sleep yesterday and part of today makes one a bit loopy), I won't write more on the subject but hopefully I will be able to write something worth reading for Easter. I am making no promises though.

One thing that isn't helping how "blah" I am feeling is the summer weather we've been having lately. Spring has just begun but it's already pretty hot. It reminds me of late May, it's so warm. It's expected to be around the mid-80s this weekend. Yeah, it's crazy. Hopefully, the weather we've been experiencing isn't wreaking havoc of people's allergies. It's not exactly causing me too much problems but it might be what's causing me so feel so out of it. I am blaming lack of sleep, first and foremost, but I think the high pollen or hot weather might be causing me some fatigue. Sunny California sometimes is too sunny. lol.

I don't really have much going on lately. I am, more than ever, ready to go back to school. I'm going to take a few days to soul search about things that are going on in my life... which all comes back to how strong my faith is and thinking of ways I can strengthen it. As I continue to read St. Teresa of Avila's autobiography, and especially after my chat with Fr. Leo, I came to a fork in the road. I thought that I could take the road I was taking before -- feeling like I really can't do anything because the anxiety has been debilitating me. Or, if I take Fr. Leo's advice and a cue from St. Teresa, I could quit thinking that I will never get better and do something about it. I've decided to take the second road -- the one which is harder but will be more worthwhile. And, I've actually started down the road.

For the first time in a very long time, I had friends over. Well, technically one friend that I hadn't seen in about 2 and a half years. She is the first friend I've had over to simply hang out (I'm not counting the friends I had over one evening last Spring but that was to do an English Lit project). It was absolutely wonderful to see her again. Whoever said that having a solid support system behind you, especially when you're sick, was absolutely right. I felt like my old self and for that, I was and am truly grateful. :) This single event has made me realize just how blessed I am to have the friends I have now and I feel like I have even more excuses to get better -- physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. I highly recommend surrounding yourself with friends, it's wonderful. :)

Alright, well, that's it for tonight. As I've said, I'm a bit out of it (darn the wacky sleep schedule), super tired and I have too much going on in my mind due to the big creative kick I am on (lots of writing for my novel) so I should get to it. As always, thanks for reading and God Bless.

P.S. Have I ever recommended reading St. Teresa's autobiography? If I haven't, I do now! If you can, I encourage you to read it. It's an amazing book. :)

Writer's Block and Doing the Sign of the Cross While Sleeping.

Why is it that every time I start to write a book (or screenplay) I go through like a week or two worth of Writer's Block? Well, no... I take that back. It isn't so much writer's block as it is procrastination. Every single time it's the same thing. I write a page or two then don't write anything for weeks. It's such a horrible habit. When one of my best friends asked me when it was due to be finished I had to set a deadline for myself or else it'll never get done. My self-appointed deadline is the day before Easter. I am aiming to have the novel done and edited (and re-edited) by then. It'll definitely not be easy -- especially since I'm still picking and choosing which things to include and which to leave out -- but I love a challenge. It's very easy for me to just write and write... it's the whole getting started thing that's always the tricky part. Once I get the first 10 pages done, it's a breeze. We'll see, though. Hopefully I can meet my deadline.

Something kind of funny that happened today was that I did the sign of the cross while I was still asleep. lol. Yeah, I'm very serious. I have the habit of turning on the t.v. if I end up waking up between 4 and 7 a.m. just because it helps lull me back to sleep again so I get my full 8 hours. I had it on EWTN in Spanish (they took the English version of EWTN off the list -- darn you, Time Warner Cable!) and I actually ended up dreaming everything that was aired on t.v. I dreamt Pope Benedict XVI giving a speech and of the Daily Mass. I actually ended up doing the sign of the cross when they priest was saying "In the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit..." -- and I was so completely asleep. Hahaha. It wasn't until I woke up that I realized what I'd just done and I just kind of giggled because I've never known anyone else to do that. It was awesome! lol. So that's my little story. lol.

Okay, well this blog is going to be short today. I have to get up early tomorrow 'cause I have two doctors appointments at two different places. I haven't been feeling too well lately and I need to get those things taken care of. I'm going to pray that things will get better because I've been sick for quite a while now and I miss feeling like my old healthy self. So for now... thanks for reading and God Bless. :D