Patron Saints for 2017

As I wrote two weeks ago, for the first time since this blog's inception, you lovely readers won't be voting on this blog's patron saint for the upcoming year. Instead, I opted to make the Holy Family the permanent patron saints for the blog. It's something I thought about for a long time and it seemed like the right time to make this change.

St. Joseph (2016) was the last patron saint chosen by y'all. Others throughout the years have included: St. Dymphna (2007), St. Teresa of Avila (2007 and 2012), Bl. Pier Giorgio Frassati (2008 and 2009), St. Cecilia (2010), St. Therese of Lisieux (2011), St. Catherine of Siena (2012), Mary Undoer of Knots (2013), St. Raphael the Archangel (2014), and St. Brigid of Ireland (2015). That is a pretty awesome list and each patron saint really helped me out a lot each year that they were chosen; some in unexpected ways. Thank you all who voted for the saints over the years. :D

Just because I'm not asking y'all to help me to pick a patron saint doesn't mean I don't want one for 2017. This year I decided to use Jen Fulwiler's Saint's Name Generator. I said a small prayer ("please, let me get a saint who will help me with whatever will be my biggest obstacle") before I clicked the button. I got...

The result made me laugh for three reasons. First, today I went to visit Dad's grave for the last time for this year... and his patron saint was St. Michael the Archangel. Second, this year I was able to identify that I need a lot of help with a couple of temptations (an example: the temptations to be lazy and procrastinate when I should be doing something important) that I need to work on in the upcoming year. Third, this year was the year that the devotion of praying the Chaplet of St. Michael finally stuck. I even asked Allison to custom-make a chaplet for me to use. 

But wait... I wanted one more patron saint for something else that's been on my heart lately: my vocation. I did the process again and got...

The archangel who told Mama Mary she was to be the mother of our Lord. He will be the patron of my vocation discernment. I think I'm in good hands. At this point I think I should just add St. Raphael the Archangel and adopt all three archangels as my patron saints for the upcoming year. lol. 

Are any of you choosing patrons for the upcoming year? If so, will you do a reader poll like I used to or will you be using the Saint's Name Generator as well? I would love to hear which you're doing and who you've gotten as your patron saint. :D

My molar (the one that needs a root canal... that I cannot currently afford and isn't covered by my dental insurance) is starting to hurt a little so I'm going to rest for a little while. St. Apollonia, please pray for me!

As always, thanks for reading and God bless! :D

I Have an Angelic Question

St. Michael Archangel Catholic Church in Miguel Auza, Zac. Mexico.
Copyright Pedro Aguilar. That's my big brother to y'all.

The feast of the Archangels Michael, Gabriel, and Raphael has always been of interest to me. My older brother (who passed away before I was born) would've celebrated his birthday tomorrow. Growing up, Mom used to say that he was a little angel looking out for me since he died when he was 11 months old and therefore had committed no sins. I always remember him and the angels today and tomorrow.

After my father died, the day became more interesting because St. Michael the Archangel was his patron. I think I still have the picture of St. Michael that hung in front of his bed towards the end of his life. The paternal side of family comes from a town named Miguel Auza, Zacatecas in Mexico. (fun fact: I've been able to trace the family lineage to that town as far as the 1700s.) The town was founded today and was originally named after, surprise, St. Michael the Archangel by a Spanish captain. The name was later renamed Miguel Auza during the time of the Cristero War / anti-Catholicism. Still, to this day they celebrate the feast of St. Michael in a big way. I've never personally experienced it (we always visited during the summer) but Dad used to share stories of how gorgeous the celebrations were. I hope to experience this for myself one day.

I've personally had St. Michael (thanks to my dad) and St. Raphael on my prayer intentions call list several times. I love the novena to St. Raphael, which ended yesterday. Of course, having been sick since my reversion a decade ago, St. Raphael is an old chum of mine. ;) I wish I could say that I knew more about St. Gabriel but I don't. I remember him during the first decade of the Joyful Mysteries of the Rosary but, besides that, I don't go to him for any intercessions. I should look up what he's the patron of.

After my car accident almost a year ago (on October 13; the anniversary of the Miracle of the Sun) made me even more curious about angels and archangels. You'll have to read the blog post for that day to find out why. ;) I've been doing the chaplet of St. Michael Archangel (as well as the prayer to St. Michael) on an almost daily basis for a long time but I haven't really read much about the angels. We sort of touched on it when I was at JP Catholic but it wasn't enough for me. I feel like there's still a lot that I need to learn.

I think there are a lot misconceptions about angels so I really want to learn from legitimate sources... and today seems like a good day to start that research. I already have a small booklet on St. Raphael (which I'll be re-reading today) but I want to learn about angels from a more theological and philosophical POV. Oh, I'm sorry, is my wannabe lay Dominican side showing? ;) Does anyone have any recommendations for websites, books, audiobooks, podcasts, etc which would help me for the research I want to do? Thanks for the suggestions in advance.

Anyway, I just wanted to ask while I took a study break. I don't think I'm going to do anything big for today's feast day (I didn't get a chance to prepare this year) but I know Michaelmas celebrations are a thing and I hope to learn for next year. :D

I hope y'all are having a great week thus far. :D

As always, thanks for reading and God bless! :D

When the Dam Burst, I Was Honest with Myself

This past week was incredibly eye opening and revolutionary for me. While in earlier weeks I had been dealing with physical illnesses, this week it was all about emotional turmoil and spiritual dryness.

It happens every year around the anniversary of my father's death. I start feeling a bit apathetic, a little depressed, and a little anxious. It didn't help that I felt like people were dumping all of their problems on me and then disappearing once they "deposited" their problems into the human vault that is me. It's an unfortunate pattern with me; many friends only touch base when they need to unload and then I don't hear from them again until they need another round of venting.

After being physically drained from the dehydration, infection, and the consequent side effects of the medication, I wanted a little break. I wasn't going to get it with July 11th (anniversary of my father's death) coming up but I wasn't expecting to get overwhelmed with everything else that happened. Between the dumping of problems, various other comments about me and others (read: gossip), and feeling, well, almost bullied into doing things I had no desire to do, it's amazing I didn't have a full blown panic attack.

The dam burst around Thursday/Friday. I sobbed. I vented my own frustrations to my poor mother who had to deal with a daughter who was fed up. "I'm tired of people judging me," I cried. "I'm tired of being pushed into doing what I don't want to do. I'm tired of people make snide comments. I'm tired of..." the list went on. She let me cry because she knows I occasionally need to emotional release when I'm overwhelmed by others' problems. Does this happen often? No, but it happens more often than I'd care for.

After I let all that pent up frustration out I did something I had been working up the courage to do: I was honest when someone upset me. I started doing it even before I read this article on Introvert, Dear. Instead of just bottling it up or pretending I was okay, I told whoever upset me that I wasn't happy. "I'm upset right now... let's take a break from this conversation," was my mantra this weekend. The reactions were varied. Some chose a very passive-aggressive route. (Thanks for helping me identify it, all those psychology courses I took as an undergrad!) Thankfully, I have incredibly understanding people in my life. It became quite clear who I could count and whom I couldn't. I only talked to two friends this entire weekend -- both incredibly patient and supportive guy friends whom I trust implicitly. I took a break from most things until I got my thoughts and emotions sorted out.

A beautiful thing happened during this time: my spiritual dryness lessened considerably and my eyes were opened. As I immersed myself in prayer after feeling somewhat apathetic for weeks, I began seeing that certain situations had been pulling me away from God and my prayer life. A number of things I have to go to confession for came as a result of these situations. The worst in me was being pulled out by certain friendships. When I took a breather and really saw what was my fault and what I couldn't take "credit" for, a peace settled in me. Furthermore, I saw which friendships brought out the best in me; which challenged me to become a holier and more humble version of myself, one who was more aligned with the kind of woman I'd like to be. With perfect timing, the chaplet of St. Michael Archangel I'd custom ordered from Allison arrived when I had this breakthrough. Well played, God. Well played.

Even though most of us are out of college (and then some), there are a couple of things that don't ever go away as we get older; things we think will die in college. Recognizing that we occasionally need to look at our friendships and be honest with ourselves is something I periodically do but it's never easy. You develop a camaraderie with people who may lead you down the wrong path or whom may be all wrong for you. I'm still learning that it's okay to say "I appreciate what they've done for me but it isn't a healthy friendship for either of us" (because I DO take into consideration what I bring into the friendship for the other person). I'm learning to not feel guilty for realizing that it's actually an act of charity (to myself) to do something for myself; something that will help keep me on the right path towards holiness.

I have a massive mountain to climb in the next couple of weeks, but I'll keep my beloved Bl. Pier Giorgio Frassati's words in mind: "Verso l'alto." I must remember that I'm striving towards something that will be hard to obtain yet eternally rewarding: Heaven and sainthood. I can't do that on the path I've been on lately and it's going to take a lot of emotional suffering (on my side) to make things right. Well, the path to Heaven is not easy one but one I'll gladly suffer through to reach the destination.

That's it from me for now. I hope the temperatures go down a bit so I can make the last Mass of the day. I hate missing Mass so fingers crossed. In the meantime, I'll go read a book. :)

I hope y'all had a lovely weekend. :)

As always, thanks for reading and God bless! :D

What I Learned Wednesday #33: Trust, St. Catherine of Genoa, and a Chaplet

I know, I haven't written in over a week. I have at least one major exam per week and a ton of reading and homework to do so that's my excuse. lol. Sorry but I'm basically doing grad level work (or so I was told) in my pre-grad program so I don't have a lot of free time. I'm making time for this post though. :)

So what have I learned since my last WILW post?

I

I've been trying to let things go and trying to trust God more. As someone who has suffered from anxiety disorder since she was 15 years old (almost half of my life thus far), it's been hard to not worry or to not try to do everything possible in order to not get a bad experience. A lot of times I want to revert to my old self because it's safe and comfortable but I don't. I'm not letting anxiety get the best of me anymore. I still get anxiety from time to time (and it's been a particular pain in the tush the past two days) but I've learned (thanks to both my spiritual director and my PTSD therapist) to stop it in its tracks so that I don't get derailed. While I'm driving or out, anxiety begins to creep out for whatever reason but I take a deep breath and say "nope, not this time; Lord, I trust in You" and keep going on with whatever I was doing. My SD has been drilling this idea (to let go and trust God despite what I may be feeling) into my head for months now and it's finally sticking. That's nearly 13 years old fears and terrible habits that I'm undoing. I still have a long way to go but I know I'll get there with the help of God, my SD, and some saintly intercessions. :)

Lesson (is being) learned: It's better to simply trust God instead of trying to control outcomes and/or worrying about things that may or may not happen.

II

I'll admit that I haven't read much on St. Catherine of Genoa just yet but what I have learned about her has hit really close to home. Not to say that I endured what she did through a husband (I've never been married) but I've had someone in my life who reminds me of her husband. Without going into detail, I will say that it was not a romantic relationship and that the actions and his later conversion of St. Catherine's husband reminded me so much of that of person. Furthermore, her own personal interior struggles in letting her spiritual director "in" is something I've been working through with my own (very patient and wonderful) spiritual director. This goes back to the whole issue of my learning to trust God. I'm not there yet but I'm slowly getting there. As I said earlier this month, I had never heard of her before the dream I had but I'm so happy that she came up when she did.

Lesson learned: we can learn a lot from the lives of saints. I also have a new saint who inspires me to keep working hard towards my goal of living a more saintly life... and wearing my mantilla more often. St. Catherine of Genoa is a patron for those who are ridiculed for their piety so it works.

III

As I mentioned in my last 7 Quick Takes post, I recently learned about the Chaplet of St. Michael the Archangel and I absolutely love it. The chaplet is a bit different than the Chaplet of the Divine Mercy (which I actually prayed before I finished writing this blog post) but it's so lovely. I love the idea of having an escort of nine angels chosen from each of the nine Choirs accompanying me when receiving Holy Communion. Did you know that was attached to this chaplet? Well, now you do! I have yet to figure out when I will be able to do this (because my day is mostly spent studying/reading) but you can bet that I'm going to try to get into the habit of reciting this chaplet daily.

Lesson learned: there are still a lot of great chaplets, novenas, and prayers out there and all are worth giving a shot. Also, I've inherited my mother's love of angels. 

Well, that's it for now. I need to get back to the salt mines.

I hope y'all are having a great week thus far. 

As always, thanks for reading and God Bless! :D

7 Quick Takes Vol. 17: Study Breaks and Saint Dreams Edition

-- 1 --

I hope y'all enjoyed doing the St. Dymphna novena that was posted over the last couple of days. I failed to post the link to day 8 on the FB page but I know y'all knew the posts were still posted daily as I scheduled them ahead of time. ;) As I posted on the page, the Mary Undoer of Knots novena started yesterday via Pray More Novenas. If you haven't started it, there's still time. It's one of my all-time favorites and quite powerful.

-- 2 --

Speaking of the FB page, I've been more active on it because it's sometimes easier to get certain content seen than on Twitter. That and I'm trying to stay away from Twitter during the day. lol. I use Twitter for everything, not just Catholic content. I try to keep the content on the FB page purely Catholic so, in case you want more of that, please consider "liking" the page. ;)

-- 3 -- 

I can't believe my debut novel has been out for two weeks today... and it's still selling! That's still kind of crazy to me. Did you know that if you have Amazon Prime you can also "borrow" it? Seriously, I'm not about making money (and I would host a giveaway if it wasn't my contract with Amazon to not give it away); I just want young women (and fellas) to have something else to read that doesn't contain smut or any of the other problematic issues other novels have. The characters are flawed and they don't always make the best decisions but parents don't have to worry about their teenagers reading about "sexy times" or other questionable things. I personally like the sequel better but you need to read the debut to make sense of the second one. ;)

-- 4 --

As some of you might've seen on Twitter and the FB page, last week I had a very interesting saint dream. Basically, there were three saints: St. Catherine of Genoa, St. Catherine of Siena, and Bl. Pier Giorgio. Bl. PGF is a veteran (in terms of the number of appearances in my dreams) but it was the first appearance of both St. Catherine of Genoa and St. Catherine of Siena. I had actually never heard of St. Catherine of Genoa prior to the dream so the fact that she popped up was interesting. It's kind of how it happened with St. Teresa of Avila upon my reversion. Anyway, in the dream I had a sense of St. Catherine of Genoa wanting to help me, but I was unclear as to how. Then St. Catherine of Siena and Bl. PGF were there, by my side, because they were also going to help as well. I figured out what St. Catherine of Genoa is patroness of and it still amuses me because I'm currently trying to figure out a situation pertaining to my vocation. No clue what it means but I still laugh over the coincidence. lol.

-- 5 -- 

And while on the topic of the dream and coincidences, I figured out two very cool real life coincidences connected to the dream. First: Did you know that the female protagonist in my novel, Lina (Catalina), was named after St. Catherine of Alexandria... who appeared to St. Joan of Arc in real life? Yep. Guess who was born of St. Joan of Arc's feast day? This girl! I didn't even realize that until last week. Funny! Also, it just dawned on me that both St. Catherine of Siena and Bl. Pier Giorgio Frassati (who appeared in my dream) are both Dominican saints... and I'm looking into becoming a lay Dominican. Loving the connections. ;)

-- 6 --

Update from my studies: I am drowning in the amount of reading, assignments, and exams I have to do on a weekly basis. :( So far I have all possible points in most classes (I got a 9/10 in one assignment for one class) but it's hard to maintain near perfect grades. One of my professors is allowing us to do quizzes an unlimited number of times because of how dense the material is and how much of it we have to memorize. I have two big exams coming up (one tomorrow and the other -- harder! -- on Monday morning) so I'm taking tonight through Monday morning to step away from social networks to really immerse myself in the material. I knew the program was intense (as will the grad school program; I'm in the post-baccalaureate program) but, goodness, I didn't know it was going to be this bad. I have 5 courses, too! I'll just offer it up. This is something I really want to do so I will work hard in order to achieve it. A little (or a lot) of hard work never hurt anyone. No, shush, let me believe that. lol.

-- 7 --

There's really not much to report on. My days are filled with lectures, note taking, reading, etc. I have been keeping up my daily prayers (except last Sunday morning; oops!) and I'm trying hard to examine my conscience on a daily basis so that I'm aware of my actions. Hopefully the Undoer of Knots novena I'm doing will help with that. Oh! And, thanks to Thomas Pringle, I learned about the Chaplet of St. Michael the Archangel! I knew about the scapular (blue and black; looks like a shield) but had no idea the chaplet was so good! :D I'm going to incorporate that (along with the Chaplet of the Divine Mercy) when I take my study breaks. Need to do prayer in between study to keep myself sane. lol.

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

That's it for now. I need to go pick mom up from work and then turn in an assignment early (doing everything early this week) so I can focus on studying for my exams for the rest of the weekend. I hope y'all are doing well!

As always, thanks for reading and God bless! :D