FAQ on My Benedictine Oblate Journey and Oblates in General

Holding my blessed Benedictine Oblate scapular, right after the novitiate ceremony.

Yesterday, I mentioned my goal of learning the Final Act of Oblation entirely in Latin in preparation for the event next summer, via Twitter. That set off a bunch of questions about my journey as an Oblate and what a Benedictine Oblate is in the first place. This was not the first time I've gotten these kinds of questions, either. It seems a lot of people are interested in knowing either what it means to be an Oblate (as it's not as popular as being a third-order Carmelite or Dominican) and/or my journey so here is a short FAQ that I hope will answer some of the most common questions I get.

• 1. Why did you want to become an Oblate?

This is a really, really long story that I've already written about here. The gist of it is that I felt called to become a lay member of a religious order. If I couldn't be a nun (which I had wanted), I could still be a lay member. It's something that had been on my heart for several years. For years I went between the Carmelites and Dominicans. Then three things happened within a relatively short span of time. The 2016 Norcia earthquake decimated the town, including the basilica built over St. Benedict's birthplace/home. Never had any news felt so personal to me than that. I ended up donating novel royalties to help them rebuild their community because it felt like my own home was impacted. Then I read The Benedict Option by Rod Dreher. Yes, the book is "controversial" but it sparked my curiosity about the Benedictine order and the Rule. I read The Rule and it just clicked for me; it fit my temperament and how I envisioned living my life to best serve God. Then my best friend sent me a book on the Oblate life and it sealed it for me.

• 2. Where are you an Oblate novice? Which monastery?

I am an Oblate novice with the Monks of Norcia in Norcia, Italy. Yes, the same community whose home was destroyed in the earthquake. They are actually still rebuilding their community, 3+ years after the earthquake. If you feel so inclined, please donate here. The Italian government decided not to give them the basilica to rebuild again so they headed up the mountains. I'm not a happy camper about the decision made by the government but my beloved community has made the most of it and they're doing such a great job starting (basically) from scratch.

• 3. How did you choose the monastery you attached yourself to?

First, I looked at all of my options. I looked at the local Benedictine monasteries, meaning St. Andrew's Abbey in Valyermo (within the Los Angeles Archdiocese) and those in California. I also looked into Benedictine monasteries that took in distance oblates. My current spiritual advisor suggested I stick to a traditional community since I attend the Latin Mass solely and am "trad" minded. It ended up coming down to Clear Creek Abbey in Oklahoma and Norcia in Italy. In the end, Norcia won for several different reasons, beginning with the fact that it's felt like home since I first learned about its existence. They're also a musically-inclined community (their Benedicta: Marian Chant album is excellent; you can watch a video on it here) which was perfect for this music nerd. Once I met our Oblate master, I knew it was the perfect fit for me. I love the entire community; the monks and my fellow Oblates. When they all rallied behind me when I got sick at the retreat, despite not knowing me, I knew it was just the kind of family I needed. Norcia is my home -- my spiritual home -- and I could not have picked a better place for myself. I hope to visit it as soon as health and finances allow it.

• 4. When will you become a full-fledged Oblate?

God willing, next summer. The novitiate period is usually no less than a year and a day for most Oblates. It might be slightly shortened for me because our annual retreat might happen before the year mark of the beginning of my novitiate (June 30, 2019). I'm going to wait to see how it all plays out -- if they're going to change the location or dates. I definitely intend to make it to the annual retreat next summer, wherever and whenever it's held.

• 5. Are you getting an Oblate name? Did you get to pick it?

I did ask for an Oblate name at the retreat this past summer so, yes, I will be getting one. However, I won't know what the name will actually be until right before I make my Final Act of Oblation. Most monasteries allow Oblates to choose their names but, at our particular monastery, the prior chooses them for us. I was going to choose "Francesca" in honor of St. Frances of Rome (patroness of Benedictine Oblates and fellow "God, I won't want to do this, but I'll do it because you want me to" kindred spirit) and my best girlfriend, Francesca, who has continuously challenged me to become the best and holiest version of myself over the years. My Oblate master warned us not to say which names we wanted because it was almost guaranteed that we wouldn't get it so... totally don't want "Francesca" or any of the other 2 names I'm hoping for! lol.

• 6. So, what is an Oblate? Is it like a third-order made up of lay members?

This one is a little complicated so I'll try to explain it as plainly as I can. It's not a third-order like the lay Carmelites or Dominicans. We don't attach ourselves to local "chapters"; we attach ourselves to specific monasteries and are then considered as part of that specific community. That means that I'm now a member of my community -- one of their newest "little sisters" -- but not a member of any other Benedictine community/monastery. Also, not all of us are "secular Oblates." Yes, most of us are but not all. Just in my own community alone, we have a couple of diocesan priests who have attached themselves to the monastery. Yes, it's allowed as long as you're not a part of any other religious order.

• 7. What is asked of Benedictine Oblates?

This answer varies from monastery to monastery but, basically, there a few things in common. First, the motto "Ora et labor" tells you everything. Work and prayer are part of our daily routine, as is Lectio Divina (the study part that isn't part of the motto). For me, in particular, I pray as many of the Hours as possible. That means praying the Little Benedictine Office, the Little Office of the Blessed Virgin Mary, or the Monastic Diurnal. That part, at least for my community, is up to us. We also have to adapt the Rule of St. Benedict to fit our specific lives, in whichever season of life we are. As a single woman, I have more time for prayer and Lectio Divina right now. As someone recovering from illness, work means freelance articles when my fatigue and eyesight allow it. It also means my "ministry" is evangelization via social media (particular through my articles for Epic Pew, this blog, Twitter, and Instagram). My hospitality is confined to what I can do when we have visitors over at our apartment. In the future, it might be the reverse; more work, less prayer, and ministry and hospitality outside the home.

• 8. You mentioned wanting to be buried in a Benedictine habit when you die, in a tweet. Is this allowed? 

Yes, it is. I've heard some places will allow you to wear habits as a secular Oblate, with special permission, but I believe it's extremely rare. It's more likely allowed upon death. I don't know if this varies from monastery to monastery but I believe my community does allow us to be buried in Benedictine habits. So, yes, I want this to happen when my time comes.

• 9. I'm interested in becoming an Oblate. How can I make this happen?

First, read the Rule of St. Benedict. If the Benedictine spirituality is something that speaks to you and you become even more curious about becoming an Oblate, I'd recommend speaking to your spiritual advisor/director about it. My former SD urged me to wait until I was done with school and had more time to focus on the discernment when life was less crazy because it does take time to discern. After I finished school, I was able to discern which religious order and spirituality I felt called to incorporate into my life. Remember, I was discerning between two completely different orders and the Benedictines ended up winning. Speak to other Oblates, read books on life as on Oblate, and go from there. 

Anyway, I hope this helps some of y'all out. I'm in no way an expert so I answered based on my own experience what I've learned over the last 2-3 years.

Please keep me in your prayers as I continue my journey and try to fine-tune some areas of the Oblate life that I haven't had much of a chance to work on with my illnesses and limitations.  

As always, thanks for reading and God bless!

Introducing: "La Petite Fleur Mariale"

Seeing (no pun intended) how I can't always write a lot due to my current eyesight problems, I decided to start a new way of sharing my Benedictine oblate journey: an Instagram account. Now, I've had one (an IG account) for years but I've always kept it private because, well, I'm a private person. Yes, I have a blog and I'm very open online... but, if you haven't noticed, I also don't share too much. My ninja status when it comes to my relationships tipped you off, didn't it? lol. However, I was inspired to start an account to document my journey more frequently as IG posts take literally a couple of minutes to get everything done.

I started the account (@lapetitefleurmariale) on the feast of all the saints in the Benedictine order, November 13. I didn't do it on purpose, either; it just felt like it was the right time to do it and then I realized what day it had been... almost two days later. lol. I actually had to go back and edit the caption to reflect the realization. A little slow over here, y'all. lol. Don't you just love when things work out that way? I see you, Holy Spirit!

If you're wondering about the name, I explained it on the first post... which I might actually delete. I'm not much of a selfie gal and that picture is a couple of years old anyway. In case I do delete the post, the name is a French translation of "the little Marian flower." Or, at least, I hope it is. My French is incredibly rudimentary. It was inspired by both the Blessed Virgin Mary and St. Therese who are both my co-patron saints this year and who have been my biggest heavenly allies through some of the more difficult times this year. During last year's 54-day Rosary novena, I asked to become more like our Blessed Mother. I still have a loooong way to go but I've already seen her loving intercession in my life. Also, St. Therese -- my heavenly big sister and kindred spirit -- has been instrumental in my spiritual growth this year. I couldn't have asked for a better duo to help me this year. I'm actually contemplating them keeping them my co-patronesses for next year again. Stay tuned for that. ;)

I'm still going to blog, of course, as I can't always get everything written in an IG post but I will be sharing my faith journey on there more often. I'm also going to probably be a little more candid in my blog posts than IG stories. I intend to use that account to share little moments of my day that are faith-related. Yes, it's a faith-based account and I plan to keep it that way. What exactly does that mean? Think saint quotes and little stories about my faith journey. I don't foresee myself using it to give updates like I do on Twitter. I also doubt I'll post many personal pictures that involve my face. I'm still a little uncomfortable sharing those types of pictures online to strangers. That's why I might eventually pull the first picture. We'll see.

Anyway, this is just a quick post in case anyone wants to follow the journey on Instagram. I won't be accepting DMs nor will I be following everyone back. That's not because I don't care about y'all -- I do! It's just a precaution to keep myself from being overwhelmed on IG.  That's why I have my personal account private and why I don't add just anyone. I'm an HSP (highly sensitive person), y'all; too much stimulation or information overload isn't good for me and actually affects my eyesight. Yes, there's been an obvious correlation there that we've noticed the day follow unusually high-stress days.

And now I'm off to spend the rest of my day relaxing with a podcast after yesterday's Twitter argument. Yeah, someone please talk me out of it before I get too stressed.

Living The Benedictine Oblate (Novice) Life While Sick

Picture after the Oblate novitiate ceremony and scapular investiture; this marked the official beginning of my novitiate.

This morning, I heard from my Oblate master and it filled my heart with such a beautiful and immense peace and joy. I wish I had the ability to express just how lovely it felt to receive that email.

A couple of weeks ago, I sent him an email detailing my health journey. I mean, I also asked him questions about how to strengthen my spiritual life, but I updated him on life so he'd know what to advise. Today, I received a follow-up that made me very happy.

Since they're very busy out in Norcia (yes, they're still building their new monastery after the 2016 earthquake leveled their monastery; please feel free to donate here), I don't expect to hear from him often but I am always filled with joy when I do.

After receiving the email (and replying to it), it dawned on me that I haven't really talked about my oblate novitiate journey in the middle of all my health struggles. In fact, I think most people will be surprised to hear that I'm still continuing my journey considering how poorly my health has been lately. Well, let me reassure you that I'm still going forward... and I'll share with you a few theories that have been thrown around amongst my friends (a little later) of how the two are connected.

As the Benedictine motto ("Ora et labora"; pray and work) suggests, two of the pillars of the spirituality are work and prayer. As Oblate attached to this particular monastery, I'm also to embrace penance (more on this in a bit), charity (especially towards the poor and the unfortunate), chastity, keep up the days of fasting and abstinence, and work on being obedient. I'm also to detach myself from the world (be a part of it but not of it) and reject pride.

What I've been focusing on in my current state has been prayer and obedience. Actually, obedience has been the biggest focal point for me these last couple of weeks because I've been actively discerning my vocation for the last couple of months. The only thing I'm going to say about that is that I'm incredibly happy with where God seems to be leading me. Of course, credit goes to my Oblate master who encouraged me to go forward with it at our retreat. I knew there would be obstacles (even before the health issues began) but it's been such a beautiful experience so far and I have no doubts I'm doing God's will for me. Finally! I have confidence in something I'm doing! lol.

The obedience part of the vocation discernment is sometimes hard because my spiritual director occasionally tells me to do something that I don't technically want to do but know I have to do. That's the beauty of obedience: you break your own selfishness and passions in order to follow the wisdom of those who know better than you; those who care about the state of your soul and want to see you doing the right thing in your discernment.

The prayer part of my life has been the easiest for me to maintain because of the routine I had established prior to my Oblate novitiate. I pray the Little Office of the Blessed Virgin Mary (sometimes the little Benedictine Office) at least twice daily, or more if I'm able to. For example, today I've able to do all the hours so far, except Terce because I fell asleep for a little while. I pray the Rosary daily. I have a number of prayers that I know by heart and can do while I'm blinded by lights (the photophobia has been my biggest enemy lately) and have to wait to regain my eyesight once again. If it wasn't for prayer, I probably wouldn't be able to go through some of the obstacles I've encountered recently.

For obvious reasons, the "work" part has had to be modified to fit with what I'm capable of doing with my worsening eyesight and my overall fatigue and physical limitations. I still write for Epic Pew and Catholic Chemistry when I'm able to; though I've had to take a couple of weeks off here and there when I'm not doing too well. Thankfully, both editors are great and understanding if I'm late with deadlines or if I need a couple of breaks writing. God bless them both!

I also try to keep my family duties as well as I can. I help run errands when my eyesight and fatigue cooperate with me. I keep the financial budget as well as I can. I drive my mom to work every morning, except on days when I'm completely blind in the morning and it's extremely dangerous for me to try to drive. As my health begins to stabilize, I'll be adding more of the housekeeping duties I usually have. At the moment, my only big ailment is my eyesight; the low blood pressure fainting spells and the physical weakness have both gotten better in recent weeks.

I know I need to work on Lectio Divina (another pillar of the Benedictine spirituality) and Mass attendance. I'm sure you can guess why I've been failing at these two -- my worsening eyesight AND health problems that have left me housebound for several days at a time. In fact, I spend most of my days in bed, with my adjustable bed base reclined up so I can sit more comfortably. Still, if I can go to confession and/or Mass, I go! I also try to get the daily Mass readings in, even if I have to highlight it and have Siri read it to me when my eyesight is particularly bad.

The scrupulous side of me is anxious about failing at these two things because they're such a major part of the Oblate life. At the same time, I also remind myself that I can only do so much with what I have going on. I try to not be hard on myself because, honestly, there is only so much screen and/or reading I can do before my eyes have had enough for the day. Some days, I have to keep my eyes closed for most of the day (enter Catholic podcasts and audiobooks for company) because my eyesight is just completely horrendous. For now, I'll continue to pray that I have little pockets of good eyesight time to be able to get myself to Mass and/or do Lectio Divina more regularly.

Having said all of that, yes, I absolutely still firmly intend to go forward with my novitiate as planned. I also still plan to attend the annual retreat next year and make my final Act of Oblation. I have a couple of friends who have a theory that all of this is happening because of my novitiate discernment. My health issues didn't really start until a week before I left for my retreat and, if you remember, I had my first ER visit during the retreat. You know... like someone (or something) doesn't want me to go forward with this for some reason. Anyway, just putting that theory out there. You draw your own conclusions. Since St. Benedict is now my spiritual father, I will let him intercede for me as necessary. God's will be done, no one else's.

I think that's as "in a nutshell" as I can get. I tried to keep it as short as I could. God willing (and my eyesight and health cooperating), I will be getting back into my blogging groove this month. Again, God willing. I've been doing the 54-day Rosary novena with my eyesight as my first intention so we'll see just what miracles Our Lady will do for me. Even if it's not a full restoration of my eyesight, I know I will receive the graces necessary to cope with whatever is ahead of me.

Of course, I will keep y'all updated on both my Oblate novitiate (especially now that I've remembered to do so; mea culpa!) and my health journeys!

Please keep me (and particularly my eyesight and the ophthalmologists treating me) in your prayers this next month as we hope to finally get some answers with the latest round of blood work tests and a new MRI scheduled for next week.

And, that's it for now. I have to go grocery shopping because I've run out of food. I was waiting for my mom to get home so I would have an extra pair of eyes with me; it's best while my eyesight is wonky.

I hope you've all been well!

As always, thanks for reading and God bless!

My Oblate Retreat, Part One: Obstacles, Tears, and a Trip to the ER

"God alone is my rock and my salvation, my fortress; I shall not fall..." (Ps 62:7, NABRE)

These were the first words I read when I randomly opened up the Bible in my room at the retreat center. It was the third day of the retreat and I was running on empty; tears flowing down my cheeks because I felt like I didn't belong there. But, before I go on, let me start from the beginning...

Exactly one week before I left for the trip, I started feeling sick. I had a low-grade fever that came out of nowhere. Every day after that was a new, different thing. Fever, aches and pains, fatigue, stomach issues, debilitating headaches, etc. It was never the same thing. The day before I left for the retreat, I got food poisoning (as did my mom) and I felt so terrible that I didn't know if I was going to have to cancel my trip at the last minute.

I had a strong feeling that taking the trip was a bad idea; that I should stay at home instead. I had so many strong doubts the day before that I felt overwhelmed. Eventually, my stubborn side kept reminding me that, no, I wanted this. That and I know that "feelings" can sometimes trip us up so I wasn't trusting them.

I'd been praying about/discerning becoming a Benedictine oblate for a long time. I kept reminding myself that I wouldn't have raised $800 in 11 hours if it wasn't God's will for me to make this trip. (By the way, if you're new to my journey, you can read about the beginning of my discernment to the fundraiser here.) God had made it clear that He wanted me to do this so I would, no matter what obstacles would come my way. What I didn't know was that the entire retreat would be full of obstacles that would leave me feeling drained.

I started my trip on only two hours of sleep. Due to the heebie-jeebies I get being on a plane, I can't sleep during flights. We had a pretty smooth flight but I was seriously fighting sleep by the time we landed in O'Hare. Thankfully, a fellow oblate offered to drive me from the airport to the retreat center so I was able to nod off during the drive. We went to lunch with other oblates before we went to the center, which I'm grateful for because it would be the last decent meal I'd have for 3 days.

Months beforehand, I let the oblate who organized the retreat know about my food allergies and intolerance. (side note: this was prior to my food allergy panel results.) He let me know that they would be able to accommodate my dietary restrictions. A few days before the retreat, I let him know I would be taking a small part of my food; the corn tortillas and a few snacks in case there was a mix-up. I'm grateful I took them because there was a major mix-up: they thought I would be taking all of my food and they weren't prepared for me. Gulp. The next couple of days consisted of me eating mostly tortillas and the few snacks I'd taken because they kept making me food that made me sick. At least I got some protein in the form of chicken... even though I ended up getting sick from it because they prepared it with ingredients my stomach couldn't tolerate. I was so hungry that I didn't care; I ate it all even though my body physically ached afterward.

On the second day of the retreat, I felt physically spent. I thought it was due to the lack of food and the lack of sleep so I tried to tough it out. When I started swaying and feeling like I was going to pass out whenever I stood up, I knew I had to let someone know I wasn't feeling well. You know, in case I did faint. When I started feeling like I couldn't breathe and I started seeing black whenever I stood, I knew I had to be seen by a doctor. I asked if there was a local urgent care I could be seen at. I only told our Oblate Master because I didn't want to disturb the other oblates' retreat experience nor did I want any attention. I just wanted to be quietly seen by a doctor because I knew something was wrong and I wouldn't be able to simply ignore it. He got one of the oblates to drive me to the local emergency room.

The final diagnosis? Dehydration, near-syncope ("most likely from lack of sleep and lack of food," according to the doctor), and a migraine. Awesome. Thanks, body! They checked my bloodwork and they gave me a bag of IV fluids. I was given the okay to fly back to L.A. on Sunday. I needed to rest and hydrate as much as I could.

The next day (our third day of the retreat), our Oblate Master told me to rest as much as I could. He told me he didn't care if I stayed and rested in my room for the entire retreat; he just wanted to get the scapular on me so I could begin my novitiate with them the following day. I went down for breakfast, feeling awful because I had only slept 3 hours. The chef said, "Oh wait, we have to prepare breakfast for you, too?" They had no food for me. I was so emotionally spent that I ate my tortillas while I tried to keep myself from crying. Unfortunately, I couldn't stop the tears from spilling over but, at least, I was able to cry as silently as I could. I did not want any attention.

Other oblates would come up to me and ask me how I was feeling. I would say "better" because those IV fluids really did help me out a lot but, emotionally, I was a mess. I was exhausted so I went up to my room to nap instead of going to the third conference. I didn't want to push myself any more than I already had. Before I took that nap, though, I called my mom and told her what was going on.

I broke down and cried. I wanted to go home because of how miserable I felt. I kept second-guessing my decision to have gone on the retreat. I messaged my best friends and told them I felt like I didn't belong there. I felt like an unprepared fraud; like perhaps I'd discerned incorrectly. It was bad. I don't usually have these types of thoughts so I scared myself a bit. They reminded me that I was stronger than I felt at the time. They wondered if I was experiencing spiritual attacks because this was a major trip for me.

Prayer and Lectio Divina in my room.

I took a nap and woke up before Sext and lunch so I decided to do a little Lectio Divina. That's when I took the Bible the center had provided. I chose a random page and opened it up. Of course, I would open it up to a psalm about trusting God. I felt like He was giving me consolation; letting me know that He wanted me there. I felt a renewed determination to stick it out, no matter what else would happen. The rest of the weekend was comprised of resting when I knew I couldn't push myself further, eating whatever I could, drinking as much water as I could, and trying to keep my spirits up.

Sunday -- the big day -- came. Despite the little sleep, I felt excited and ready. Since I couldn't fall back asleep after waking up at 3:30 a.m., I packed and got myself ready for the morning. I went into the kitchen and had something to eat so I wouldn't feel lightheaded during Lauds, Mass, and the scapular investiture of the new novices. I was fine during Lauds... but then I started feeling sick during Mass. It was almost like round two of what had sent me to the ER two days prior. Cue me mentally asking all the saints to intercede for me.

I kept swaying and wanting to black out when I stood up during Mass so, at one point, I stayed seated. I was a little embarrassed because I didn't want to seem impious but I knew it would be worse if I passed out. I also knew I had to go up to the altar during the Ritus Induendi Novitium Oblatum (the investiture ceremony) so I wanted to save up whatever little strength I had.

"Mama Mary...  Guardian Angel... St. Benedict... St. Frances of Rome... all the Benedictine saints... Bl. Pier Giorgio Frassati... St. Therese... hold me up. Intercede just so that my knees won't buckle under me." I was able to get myself to the far right side of the altar and I leaned against the wall, holding on with one hand when I felt like my knees would give in. I felt like I had no physical strength... but, darn it, I was going to go through it all, standing!

As Fr. Prior was getting ready to place the scapular on me, I felt like I was going to fall to the ground. I stubbornly made myself stand away from the wall so I wouldn't have that support. I trusted God; I knew I was meant to be there so I let my fears go. (side note: who says having a bit of a stubborn streak is a bad thing? I only use it during times like these. lol.) There was no way I wasn't going to go through with it. Only the day before, after reading Psalm 62, I met with our Oblate Master and he told me that I was meant to be there. I knew it was what God wanted me to do; there had been too many "signs" that this seems to be God's will for me.

I kid y'all not, the second the scapular was placed on me by Fr. Prior, I felt the most refreshing peace wash over me. Not only that, all the shakiness and the physical weakness seemed to have disappeared in an instant. I felt strengthened... and I was instantaneously grateful for all I had endured up to that point. The tears, the physical and emotional obstacles, the ER visit... every single thing I had endured was worth it. I was grateful for all the difficulties because it made that moment even more glorious.

I didn't get to sleep for 24 hours after that, we had the worst turbulence I've ever experienced on the way back home, and it took me two full days to start feeling like myself again... but I survived.

I know it was due to everyone's prayers that I was able to make it through the entire weekend. I mean, I've struggled with constant fatigue for months now (though I'd been feeling much better and my health had been on the upswing up to a week before the trip). I can't function with less than 5 hours of sleep, yet I somehow was able to do it with an average of 3 hours of sleep per night for half a week. I can't fast because it makes me sick yet I somehow got through days of little food.

I'm sorry I missed half of the activities of the retreat. I'm also sad that I didn't get to know my fellow oblates better. I'm a little embarrassed when I think about what a first impression I made on them as well but it was a good humbling experience for me. It reminded me that I'm now part of a (lovely) community; that I can't do everything on my own and that trusting God is the only way to go. There was also no room for vanity (I walked around with my hair in a messy bun and my "humility glasses" for most of the retreat) or anything that would take away from the purpose of the trip. It was absolutely perfect in its own way.

Anyway, this post is far too long so I'll write a part two soon. Yes, there's more. I just wrote the basics of the obstacles so I can focus on the good that came from the retreat in the next post. :)

If you've made it this far, thank you for sticking with it! I promise not all posts will be this long.

I'm going to go make myself something to eat before I get back to work. I was thankfully given last week off to focus on the retreat but now it's back to writing articles and finishing my third novel. :)

Happy feast of the Eucharistic Heart of Jesus (traditional calendar) and of Bl. Pier Giorgio Frassati (unofficially in the new calendar)!

As always, thank you for reading and God bless!