What I Learned Wednesday #18: Oops!, Ahh! and Eesh! Edition

These are actually from last week but since I didn't post anything last week (and haven't for a week due to busy schedule and illness), I am using them for this week's post.

1. You know how I love futbol (soccer) to the point where it's the only sport that I watch (well, aside from the occasional rugby match)? Well, when we cancelled cable in March I had to say goodbye to my beloved Fox Soccer (which is now defunct anyway) and other sports channels that aired live matches. I looked into paying to watch them online but they were either super expensive for only a handful of matches or I had to search for links from shady websites. I wondered (although I already had a feeling I knew the answer) about whether it would actually be considered a sin to watch live matches on dubious links. I asked Fr. John Flynn over at XT3 and the answer was a definite: YES! Sorry, fellow Catholics who offered to send me shady website links. Fr. Flynn quotes the CCC for y'all which states that "2408 The seventh commandment forbids theft, that is, usurping another's property against reasonable will of the owner." Any football (yes, that's what I call "soccer") fan knows that the FA, MLS, and other franchises give certain networks rights to air the matches (for a fee, of course) and that those networks retain the rights to air the matches. So by watching matches on feeds without permission of the networks is, in fact, a form of steal. You might've not been the one who hijacked the live feed but you're still watching it without permission. You're an accessory to the crime. I haven't watched any matches on shady links in ages but I have in the past so I need to add that to my list of things I need to confess this coming weekend when I head to the confessional. Oops!

2. Something I didn't know (hello, poorly Catechized and no good formal education on Catholicism) that most English-language Bibles aren't complete. Yes, I knew that Protestant/Christian Bibles left out many books that the Catholic Church still has but I didn't know that not all Catholic Bibles were complete. Yes, you read that right: things are missing! In my Catholic snobbery (yes, I'm a bit of a snob regarding certain things; sorry, I'm woman enough to own up to it), I've preferred the Douay-Rheims version but one that I don't actually own a copy (aside from the copy in my iPieta app). My spiritual director gave me the heads up that the versions of the Bible (while Catholic) were incomplete and pointed out the fact that, if I looked it up (and I did), I would see that only 9 of the 12 fruits of the Holy Spirit are listed in Galatians 5:22-23. I compared it to the Douay-Rheims version and, yes, it's true. The DR has all 12 listed while the other Bible I primarily used had only 9. Guess it's time to save up and get myself a more complete version. Side note: The Ignatius Study Bible was also recommended but much more expensive. Ahh!

3. As some of you may know, I made the official announcement regarding my MA decision on Twitter.

Okay, I'm making this Twitter official: I've chosen a Master of Arts in Theology. Thanks to @aquinonez for listening to me for weeks. lol.
— Emmy Cecilia (@nerdwriter) August 26, 2013

I did decide on getting my Master of Arts in Theology (I even finished most of my application to my top choice) but I've been getting hit with horrible indecision and anxiety since then. The anxiety is bad... to the point where I'm suffering both physically and mentally. I'm not sure if it's a spiritual attack or if it's just a sign that this is not the path I should take so please say a little prayer for me while I try to figure that out. All I know is that my heart says Theology and my head says Speech-Language Pathology... and my anxiety says "forget it, lady!" Eesh!

Anyway, it's super hot and muggy today and the laptop is burning my thighs so I need to shut this baby (laptop) down and go jump in the water to cool down a bit.

I hope y'all have had a great week thus far and continue to have a good (or have a better) week. :D

As always, thanks for reading and God bless!

What I Learned Wednesday #17: Love Thy Neighbor Edition

I promise that Anne Shirley breaking a slate over Gilbert Blythe's head is relevant to this post.

I don't know about y'all but I have really nosy neighbors. They want to know (and usually do find out) everyone's business. Most of the time they also exaggerate and/or create gossip out of thin air. As someone who likes her privacy, I get really annoyed with it and with questions about where I'm going or what I'm doing (or who's that guy?!). That annoyance has landed me in the confessional a couple of times so I thought to myself this week "why not look at what it says about 'loving thy neighbor' and write a post about that?" So, here we are... and here we go.

1. In Matthew 22:39 it clearly states that: "Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself"... which isn't easy when said neighbor is doing something that's just plain mean. Example: A neighbor of ours told me that my mother had spoken ill of me. This neighbor isn't exactly known for being truthful 100% of the time and I knew that my mother hadn't said anything of the like but I still brought it up to my mom. Not in a confrontational manner but in a "hey, mom, Mrs. *insert surname* said that you had something this about me." Mom was, unsurprisingly, upset that someone she thought she could trust had said such a falsehood. It was just mean. Who would lie to potentially create friction in the household of "dear friends"? Well, who am I to judge the kind of person who would do that? Sure, I don't like it but it gives me no right to turn around and judge them and their actions. Do I want to go to confession for having uncharitable thoughts or seeking revenge on this neighbor? Not really. A smile, a cordial greeting, and straight to my house or car is all they're getting from me these days.

2. I've had to remind myself that, while anger is a natural human emotion, one must not dwell or act upon it. Not that I've acted upon it but I used to beat myself for getting angry at what my neighbors would say about me and/or my mother. Once, there was a rumour going around that my mother was involved with a former building manager... when it reality the guy was actually trying to court me. Yes, I used to the words "court me." We knew who started the rumour. It was the same person who, on a trip to the ER because I had an allergic reaction to food, said that I was "dying" and "throwing up" and a whole bunch of other things that were not true. I was livid. This woman who had said that I had been more ill than I was was also besmirching my mother's name and reputation for no good reason. During times like this I have to remind myself: "Be angry, and sin not. Let not the sun go down upon your anger" (Ephesians 4:26) as well as "Revenge not yourselves, my dearly beloved; but give place unto wrath, for it is written: Revenge is mine, I will repay, saith the Lord." (Romans 12:19) So, even though I am uber ticked off at times when neighbors try to make up rumours about myself and my mom, I'm learning to say "Okay, my anger is justified but I have to let it go and focus elsewhere."

3. The biggest thing I learned this week was that I really didn't know where everything I wanted to add to this blog was in the Bible. I knew that it spoke about loving our neighbors, turning the other cheek, not acting in revenge, and about gossip itself but I am so out of touch with reading the Bible that I had to look them up (also looked in my Catechism). In fact, there was so much material that I couldn't fit it all in this blog post. However, it also dawned on me that I may not be the only one. So, a challenge: look it all up in the Bible. If you have a problem with a nosy neighbor or one who likes to slander folks, look up what the Bible says and then pray for them. There are a number of reasons why these neighbors may be acting the way they do but it all boils down to them hurting themselves. Their words and actions hurt them more than they hurt those who are the objects of their gossip and rumours. Just think of what it means for their own soul. Pray for them and pray for patience for yourself if it really bugs you. My go-to prayers when I am trying to keep uncharitable words from coming out of my mouth is to say "Good gracious, give me patience" and "My God, have mercy on their souls."

Oh, I'll slip and gripe ("Ugh, why don't they mind their own business?! My business doesn't concern them") but that's what lands me in the confessional so I'm trying to get better at it. I'm nowhere near perfect but I have to remind myself that when (as my British friends like to say) I'm being a "stroppy cow", I have to be kinder than I feel. Not always easy but not impossible either. :)

I should also note that you can say something to the neighbors about their actions but I'm the "avoid conflict and arguments at all costs" kind of gal so that's why I wrote this post as someone who would rather turn a cheek and be silent. Trust me, in my situation it would be best to keep my mouth shut.

Anyway, that's it for this week's edition of What I Learned Wednesday. It's something that's been occurring more often so I thought I'd write out my thoughts/feelings.

And now I have a date with a cold glass of water (hello, summer heat wave) and a snack before I have some girl time with a good friend. :)

As always, thanks for reading and God bless. :D

What I Learned Wednesday #14: "Oh Yes, She Did" Edition

I've behind on my What I Learned Wednesday posts because I either haven't had anything to write or because I was too busy on the day of (and the day before). Anyway, since I am socializing on social networks less, I have more to write... and more to learn, apparently.

This #WILW post is a little different. I have learned new faith-related things this week but I've also noticed that there are things I haven't learned as a Catholic blogger; things that I feel are very important. Instead of listing things I have discovered about the faith, I'm going to be making a list of things I have been missing even though I do know. Got it? Okay, here we go...

1. Despite my having this blog for over five years, I have yet to learn to quote the Bible and the Catechism in my posts, regularly. Have y'all noticed this? Sure, I occasionally do have a verse quoted but usually not. I have two reasons (poor excuses, really) for this. First, I've sort of assumed that everyone who reads this blog either knows the same amount or more than I do about the Catholic Faith... or at least Christianity. I've assumed that you know the Bible better than I do. The second reason is the main reason why I don't quote verses (and it goes with the first). Because I have assumed this, I have wanted to save myself the embarrassment of interpreting something wrong and/or quoting the wrong thing. Even though I do have a BA in Religious Studies (and seriously considered a Masters in Theology), I spent most of my undergrad studies "learning" about how orthodox Christianity is wrong, why the Church and the Church hierarchy is "evil" (I'm paraphrasing but basically their words), and little to nothing about the Truth. Not their version of the Truth but the actual thing. I have studied on my own but my memory is so horrible these days that I remember reading it in the Bible and the Catechism... but I don't remember where. That is my second reason. My memory is shot and, when I'm crunched for time, I just give up on providing a quote. And before you get all "well, can't you look it up?" on me, the answer is "no" on the Catechism and "I should" on the Bible. I don't actually own a copy of the Catechism. I've been borrowing from the library. It's been on my Amazon wishlist for (I kid you not) a couple of years now. One day. In the meantime, I really should quote the Bible more often because I have three copies of that and there is no excuse.

2. I should be more open about my failings as a Catholic. I don't know if you've noticed this about bloggers in general but very few of us actually own up to not being "perfect" Catholics. We want to present the best side of ourselves to the world. There's nothing wrong with that but I feel like it makes readers feel as though there's something wrong with them for not being on that level. I know I've felt that reading other blogs. I personally do own up to things I fail at (not as often as I would like) because that's who I am. I am far from perfect. Some of the priests who know me will say that I'm too hard on myself but I just don't want to make excuses for myself and I don't want to fall into a bad habit. I have days or weeks in which I don't keep up my prayers as I should or I do something sinful that's become a habit, such as the sin of sloth. I sometimes have a real problem procrastinating and doing things at the last minute because I have, unfortunately, gotten used to having all this free time on my hands. I waste a lot of time. It's horrible. I've had some really wonderful compliments in which people think I have it all together spiritually but I don't. I often forget to pray before and after my meals because it isn't something we did when I was growing up. Sometimes I think of things that could make me fall into sin and I get tempted to say "well, I can go to confession for it this week" (and thus sin because that's presumption of God's mercy) and that stops me... but I have weeks when it's a reoccurring mental struggle. It's these little things that I feel I should be more open about. We're all human and I want this blog to show that. We all make mistakes, but God forgives us and that's a beautiful thing we should never forget.

3. I'm stuck on what else to write so... here's a Blimey Cow video that I enjoyed. Guys, a lot of this is common sense but I still think y'all should watch. Maybe this will help us interact with one another. Don't worry, I have something planned for us gals soon as well. ;)



And now I'm off to be more productive... or at least try. ;) Hope y'all have a great day. :D

As always, thanks for reading and God bless! :D

What I Learned Wednesday #11

Wow, I've really dropped the ball on this over the past two weeks. My apologies; busy weeks. Anyway, I have time now (oh, do I have time) so What I Learned Wednesdays are back. :)

1) When you go through a vocation crisis and you ask God for help, He will send you some awesome help. I don't think I've written about this but I'd been having a sort of vocation/career crisis over the last couple of weeks. I just feel like I've been stuck in my life with both my vocation and my career with no real sense of direction because I'm, once again, at a crossroads. On top of that, I sometimes I feel like I'm not all there when I pray; like I can't concentrate no matter how hard I try (though I fight hard during these times). The last days of the 54 day Rosary novena were hard because of this. It has added to the "What is my vocation? Did I discern it properly? Where is my career going? What should I pursue in grad school?" stress.

As I said on Monday, I had a moment when I felt that the Holy Spirit made my vocation clear so at least that is one less thing to worry about. I went to Sacred Heart, took pictures, and then sat down in front of the tabernacle (after I knelt and made some quick prayers). I was determined just to sit, be quiet, and focus on having some solo time with Jesus. I kid you not, the second I thought the word "vocation" I felt like something within me yelling "marriage! marriage! marriage!" followed by a feeling of happiness, relief, stability and firmness that I had never experienced before. Like "quit asking, child, it's this. Be happy." lol. It was weird but a good weird. lol. So I'm taking it as being told what it is so I can move forward... if I can move forward. That's a whole 'nother conversation I won't get into. lol.

2) As many of you have heard, Aquinas and More began having a clearance sale and they soon saw outpouring support from past customers. Because of it, they decided to have a fundraiser to keep the business going. They were the first Catholic company that I personally bought my items from when I reverted and have even been an affiliate of theirs practically from the inception of this blog. (side note: if you check out the left hand side bar, you'll see where you can search for items through this blog so that I get some credit -- not that I've ever used the credit from past purchases because I'm just happy to send them business). If you haven't already donated and can spare a bit, please do so. No, I'm not getting paid to say this nor do I get anything out of it except continuing to see a faithful Catholic store continue. Seriously, they don't care items that are not orthodox and/or made in China. I've already seen one local family run Catholic bookstore close (St. Peter's Pier in Woodland Hills... you are still missed), I would hate to see another close as well.

3) I don't know if y'all have seen this but there is a great video series that covers many Catholic topics, including the Bible. This video is just the "in a nutshell" introduction to the Bible.


Videos by this team range from covering to the Catechism to a variety of other Catholic topics. While the videos aren't new, they are to me and I am sure to many of you. It's videos like this and programs like The Bible that make me want to go back and read the Bible more thoroughly than previous times. Credit to finding this video goes to XT3 (yes, I'm still a member) who posted the link recently. :)

And that is it for this round of WILW. I am dealing with the aftermath of eating Ritz crackers (which made me feel sick yesterday) and grape juice (which I drank last night) so I want to rest a bit before I attempt to finish cleaning the house. No, my stomach still can't handle all that acid... and it's all made me very dizzy and just blah today. Meh. :( I've already received a couple of prayer requests/intentions so I am offering up this horrid discomfort/sickness up for them. Hey, gotta do something positive with it. :)

I hope to post something by Friday since work has currently dried up (and my brother left for Texas on Sunday) and I have more than enough free time to write. :)

I hope y'all are having a great week thus far. :D

As always, thanks for reading and God bless. :D

I'm a Proud Daughter, Part Two.

If you would have told me, four years ago (it's in one of the earlier blog posts that I couldn't find quickly), that my dream of having both of my parents return to the Church within a couple of years would come true, I would've said "yeah, right!" If you've been a reader of this since the beginning then you know how hard it was for me to even get my parents to attend Mass with me. My dad used to get very angry about having to drive me to confession and/or Mass. My mother would look for any excuse to not go. Though my mom was the one who prayed the most often, she was (surprisingly) the hardest to get to come back. Thankfully, she's back and I couldn't be any prouder of her.

My mom didn't fully come back to the Church until shortly before my father passed away. My dad returned to the Church the day before my 24th birthday (which remains the BEST birthday present I've ever gotten) and she followed a few weeks later. In fact, I think it was the fact that my father was dying that made her want to return. Though she had been fighting it for a long time, it's now gotten to the point where I don't have to try to persuade her to go to confession or Mass. It took two and a half years but she's finally comfortable (well, as comfortable as one can be) going to confession. We have to go weekly because there are bad habits that are hard to get rid of but I don't mind. It's a slow process but we're getting there. Yesterday she asked me to translate (from English to Spanish) the questions on the iConfession app I use to examine my conscience so that she could use it this week... and I nearly burst with joy.

Lately mom's been on a Bible reading kick.. and I'm fully supportive of it. Let's face it, we Catholics don't always read the Bible and that's where our Protestant brothers and sisters think they "pwned" us. I didn't grow up reading the Bible and I didn't really do it until I took my Intro to Monotheistic Religions course a couple of years ago. It's sad but it's not uncommon amongst us young Catholics. I truly don't think we can fully understand our Faith until we not only read what is in the Bible but also really study it. How can we back up what we believe if we're just going on what we've heard? A lot of things get skewed to fit a person's lifestyle so what we hear may not be what's really in the Bible. If you already haven't, I strongly encourage you all to read it. I'm going to make an effort to study the Bible with mom at least twice a week because I think we'll both benefit from it. I'm going to be using 150 Bible Verses Every Catholic Should Know by Patrick Madrid (which I was given as a gift a couple of years ago) to start her off. Since I couldn't find a good Spanish equivalent to it, I'll be translating it for her as well. It'll be good for both of us.

I'm just... really overjoyed at how things have turned out. Between attending Mass, going to confession, reading the Bible, AND asking me to show her how to pray the Rosary, I feel like I burst with happiness. I am grateful that the Holy Spirit has used me to bring one more person closer to Him. Though I may be physically speaking to mom, I know the Holy Spirit has been behind all of it. Of course, this is not the end of my self-given mission to bring both of my parents back to the Church. Lord knows whether my dad is still in purgatory or already in Heaven but I know He's taken care of him. As for my mom, it's only just the beginning. I don't think it'll ever be finished because we all grow every single day. I'm just looking forward to seeing how things pan out... and I hope that I can pass all of this along to my future children whenever God blesses me with them. :)

Anyway, just wanted to share a bit of what's been going on with this "mission." Now I need to try to do something productive for the day so I don't have to add another day of being lazy to my own confessions list. Yes, sloth (laziness and being unproductive) is a sin and it's easy to fall into it as a new graduate.

I hope y'all are still have a great week. If not, hit me up and I'll say a prayer for you. :)

As always, thanks for reading and God Bless!