Mean Girls and "Girl World"

When I first watched the movie Mean Girls, I'll admit I laughed out loud. While it may (at first) seem like an exaggerated version of "girl world", I've come to find that not only is it tame compared to the stuff a majority of us women go through (even as adults) but it's actually dead on underneath the humor. Trust me on this, I've lived through MUCH worse thanks to the cattiness and constant "power struggle" within the so-called girl world.

It wasn't until I found myself some really amazing girlfriends (a majority devout Christians of various denominations and Catholics) that I realized that it was possible to never set foot into the scary "girl world" that is alive and well in most parts of the world. So called Queen Bees are truly scary. Heck, I'll be 25 on Sunday and they still scare me. lol. While I can certainly defend myself, I often choose to simply turn the other cheek. It's much easier and more Christian than plotting my revenge against. Plus, I avoid drama like the plague; I absolutely loathe it. Things had been good for me for the past couple of years until someone pulled me (whether she meant to or not) back into the girl world I try so hard to avoid. If you haven't guessed it, a guy is (of course) at the center of this "fight."

I normally don't talk about my romantic relationships because I feel like it's just between the person I'm dating (or interested in) and myself. I'm still not saying much but I feel like this needs to be said because I haven't really seen this discussed in young women's blogs (at least not the Catholic ones.)

Why is it that when two young women are interested in the same guy, there is sudden competition? Not only that, some get downright vindictive if they feel you're threatening to take men's attention from her. Why? I don't get it. It's definitely worse when two girls are after the same guy. Usually they try to "one-up" each other, making themselves seem like the perfect girl to the guy and trashing the other in the process. It's absolutely sickening... and I refuse to ever take part in that sort of thing. If you think Christian women are saved, you are wrong my friends. Some so-called Christian women do things more... how can I say this?... sneakily? Is that even a word? Well, anyway, I've seen these women use theology and Christianity to get ahead in the "competition." Really? Seriously? How low can we go, ladies? Using God to get a guy to like you? Lord help us all! Not only that, the more we get into these "fights" and "competitions" the happier you're making the evil one. Is that what you really want?

Of course I don't think I have to remind y'all that not only is this type of thing just insane but it's actually extremely sinful. I can think of at least one big mortal sin that you commit while doing this. We definitely get tempted to do a lot of really stupid things just to "win" the guy. And, unfortunately, not many stop to think about what they're doing until it's way too late and the drama has erupted into a full on war. I am woman enough to admit that I've often been tempted to also "step up my game" when I've seen a girl trying to win over my crush by force (oh the tactics I can list...) but I've managed to do well thus far.

Like I said in my Friendship and Jealousy post, I firmly believe that what is meant to happen will happen. Lately, I've allowed my "competition" to do as she pleases -- doing things I'd never do to get a guy to like me -- because I know that if it's meant to be it will be. I am not going to stress myself over this. If the guy falls for the tricks he's being played, not my fault. I'm not going to say anything because that's her deal with him. Just like I don't like people butting into my affairs (trying to have a say in the outcome of it just because they can't resist), I am not going to mess with the other girl's deal. To me, it's not worth it. I'm going to be myself and if the guy doesn't realize who I am and what I can bring to the relationship, it's not my fault. I refuse to throw myself at him. I refuse to change myself for him. I refuse to enter "girl world" drama for anything, especially a guy. I'm just going to leave it up to God and, if necessary, ask St. Raymond Nonnatus (patron against gossip) or St. Margaret of Cortona for their intercession because I can only handle so much. If you feel yourself getting tempted by these or any temptations, feel free to ask St. Michael the Archangel, St. Benedict of Nursia, or St. Catherine of Siena for their intercessions -- I have great faith in them, especially since they are some of the patrons against temptations. :)

Alright, my dears, I will now focus on school. I've been wasting too much time online and I think all these happenings are a sign that I should get offline more often and focus on my finals. I think I'm getting to complacent -- I know I can finish all the work quickly so I procrastinate. I will try to update soon but don't be surprised if I don't until after Sunday. It is, after all, a big weekend for me. :D

I hope everyone is well and that all you lovely young ladies are having it easier than I have/am at the moment. :)

As always, thanks for reading and God Bless.

Quick Thought: Friendship and Jealousy

It's interesting to see just how much jealousy can damage friendships. It seems like no one has been immune to it this past week too. While it definitely hit me (though not directly because God's blessed me enough with a bit of common sense; I'm a bit too Elinor Dashwood in that sense), it seems that it hit others worse. It got me thinking: is being overcome with the emotion actually worth it? For me the answer is NO! I'm the kind of person that is able to stay levelheaded during these type of situations. God's blessed me with the ability to look at the picture clearly and without making rash decisions. I came to the conclusion that if something is meant to be it will be... and that includes friendships. If friendships are destined to end it's because it'll be best for both parties involved in the end. I've learned that very well and thank God for it. If friendships are destined to stay friendships, then they will. If friendships are meant to develop into something more, they will once both people are ready for that kind of relationship and commitment. What's so wrong with leaving it all up to God in the meantime? And why allow yourselves to get all worked up if things don't go the way you want them to? I've wanted many things (i.e. going to school abroad) but they haven't happened for many reasons and I've accepted it. Why not apply the same mentality when it comes to friendships and relationships? It would make things much easier and life a little better.

As for the jealousy one can feel because certain friends have things you don't, well... that's for another post. :)

While I am sad that a couple of my friendships are in the process of ending (as well as others being in the process of strengthening), I am eternally grateful to God for what I've been able to get from them. I feel no ill will towards them and I'm terribly sorry I couldn't offer them anything more. I will admit that for a minute or two I felt sick about the thought of it (and nearly cried) but, like I said, I remembered that I've given myself to God so whatever His will is for me I wholeheartedly accept.

And so that we don't end this on a negative note here's a song that came to my mind while this was going on. (It's a little silly but we all need it at times like this. :D)


Remember: Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened. :D

'Til next time, thanks for reading and God Bless. :D

It's Official: I'm Getting Published

Now, before everyone gets too excited, I must remind y'all that I'm still under the May 28th deadline to finish my novel -- which is actually on the brink of finally being completed. :D Having said that, y'all know I am not talking about my novel. Do you guys and gals remember me alluding to some big news that I wanted to share but couldn't until I got the official word? Well, today I got the message from Patrick Madrid that an article I'd written for Envoy Magazine will be indeed be published in the next issue. :D I wrote this article back in late January-early February and I don't know how I managed to contain my excitement all these months. I know my own posse (haha!) is surprised by the news because, really, only two people (one of them being my good friend Kathryn) outside my immediate family knew I'd written this article. lol.

I won't say what I wrote about, you'll have to wait until the issue is published to read it for yourselves. I will say that it was something very personal and near and dear to my heart... and it took me much longer to write than anything else I've written (except for the novel). It's a little nerve wrecking since I haven't had anything really published on this level before. My former college's literary magazine doesn't really count since I mainly helped on the artwork and that book of poems that I wrote (and was technically published) when I was 12 years old was a little thing. This is big for me and I am blessed and honored to have gotten this chance. :D

This is all I can say... for now. This is a huge deal for me because I got to write something that I both loved and for a Catholic publication, which is really what I've wanted to do. Though I just returned to the faith less than 4 years ago, I've been "training" to be a writer since I was a little bambina and being able to combine it with my other passion (my faith) is just amazing. :D

One thing, though, don't expect to see the name Emmy Cecilia on it since I am using my actual name. Emmy is a nickname I was given (and the name a majority of my friends and professors call me) and Cecilia is my confirmation name. I will let you guys what name to look for when the issue comes out (although, if you're on my Facebook list you already know what name to look for.)

Well, it's still early and I have many errands to run so I will try to publish the back posts (two Music Mondays, two movie reviews, two book reviews, etc) later on today or early tomorrow morning. :D

I hope you all have a great day and are having a wonderful week thus far. :D

As always, thanks for reading and God Bless. :D

Life is But a Dream?

For those of you who have read this blog long enough... you guys know I have some pretty awesome dreams sometimes. Though the frequency of saint dreams has lessen drastically over the past year, I still have them. (I will incorporate a Blessed Pier Giorgio Frassati dream I had lately into my novel as well.) Lately, it's been my dad that's been popping up -- usually giving me "messages" and "warnings." Usually, I dream that he's protecting us (mom and I, occasionally other family members) from various disasters. I believe I will keep having dreams about my dad for a really long time because I still think about him often. It's only natural. Lately, though, I've been having dreams that have me thinking twice about decisions I am making (or are about to make.)

Only a few close friends know that, a few months ago, I had a dream in which my father warned me about a good friend that I had started developing feelings for. He said that this friend was not a bad guy, but that he would not make me happy. Furthermore, I was going to find out something about this friend that I would not like. Later that same day, I did find out something about my friend that totally turned me off. This happened 6-8 months ago. Well, recently I had almost the same dream in which my father gave me the same warning -- about the same guy because the pesky feelings might've returned. Dad said "He's not good for you but..." and he shrugged with that "it's your decision" look on your face. Since I try not to be superstitious about it, I didn't really think about it too much. It could be my subconscious telling me that the feelings (which, btw, I am not even sure about) are not really there. I told my mom the dream and she shrugged it off... until she had a dream of her own.

At this point I should say that my mom very rarely has dreams about my dad. I'm the one whose dreams he pops into regularly. My father appeared in a recent dream and told my mom "I warned Emmy about this but she just didn't listen." What was happening, exactly? I had been badly drugged, abandoned in a room, by a mutual friend of the friend my dad had warned me about in my own dreams. My mom had never met this mutual friend though she'd heard about them when I had mentioned them. My mom told me about the dream and described the friend... and it sure enough sounded exactly like a real life mutual friend. When we got home (we had this conversation in between screenings of Babies and Letters to Juliet -- btw, reviews coming soon), I showed my mom a picture of the friend... and it was exactly who my mom had dreamt. Again, mom had never met this person (one of the few good friends she hasn't personally met.) That got us thinking: what is going on?

I don't like being superstitious. If I do anything superstitious, from old habits I'm trying to get rid of, I confess it. I don't like putting a lot of stock into dreams, but when coincidences like this happen... I have to wonder what's going on. Of course, I'm not saying this is a direct dream from God or from Heaven and that the message is being shown through my dad because I know he's looking after me, whether he's still stuck in purgatory or is in Heaven at this point... but what if it is? What if God is trying to make me aware of things through my dreams? Or is it just my subconscious trying to look at things more clearly? I don't know. People have been known to have dreams that have come true and God has given people messages through dreams (many saints have received them that way). At this point, I don't know what's going on. Since I have no spiritual adviser at the moment (haven't had one since Fr. Leo passed away last November and he was the one I talked to about these things), I don't know what to think. All I know is that there are some strange coincidences between the dreams and real life.

What do you guys think? I'm curious to know what everyone else thinks about this because I, myself, don't even know where to begin or what to think. I won't go into more detail about my dreams because a) I want to keep my friends' identities private and b) if it turns out I do have real, genuine feelings for my guy friend he's not finding out this way... or ever if I choose to keep it to myself. lol.

Anyway, it's late and I have to get some sleep in me since this will be a long week and I will need all the rest I can get. :)

'Til next time, thanks for reading and God Bless!

Which of the Ten Commandments Are You?

Yes, it's time once again for one of those quiz things via blogthings. As I often say with these, they are just for fun and not to be taken so seriously... especially if you've seen the kinds of quizzes they are known for.

So, which of the Ten Commandments does blogthings think you are? I'm "Thou Shalt Not Kill" (which I guessed before I even took the quiz. :D)

You Are "Thou Shalt Not Kill"

You are a very peaceful person, and you try to avoid hurting a fly if possible. You believe every life is sacred, and you wish there was no killing in the world. You have a kind heart and a passion for social justice. You wish things were more fair. It breaks your heart to know about hunger, poverty, disease, and violence. You are working towards change!

Which of the Ten Commandments Are You?

Please let me know what you got. I'll update with a proper post as soon as I get over feeling ill. :)