How to Make Capirotada for Good Friday (Recipe)

(Originally posted on EpicPew, March 30, 2018.)

When my late father was alive, he used to make a delicious dessert called capirotada. I never realized the significance of it or its ties to the Lenten season until after he passed away. While this traditional Mexican dish is served throughout Lent, it’s most appropriate to on Good Friday. “Why?” you may ask. Because each of the ingredients is symbolic of what we commemorate on Good Friday.

Capirotada reminds us of Christ’s suffering on the cross. The cloves used in the recipe reminds us of the nails used to crucify Christ on the cross and the cinnamon sticks represent the cross. The syrup is symbolic of the precious blood and the melted cheese reminds us of the Holy Shroud used to cover his body when taken down from the cross.

While there are many different recipes floating out on the internet, I found out that closely resembles the one my own father used.

Here is the recipe (taken from Mexican In My Kitchen) you can use to make for yourself:

Ingredients

• 12 Ounces About 1 1/4 cup of piloncillo or dark brown sugar
• 1 1/2 cup of water
• 1 stick of cinnamon
• 2 cloves
• 3 Tablespoons of melted butter
• 3 Tablespoons of vegetable oil
• 16 slices 1/3” thick of Bolillo (French bread)
• 3/4 cup of Cotija Cheese
• 1/4 cup of roasted peanut
• 1/4 cup raisins
• 2 tablespoons of butter cut in small cubes

Instructions

Preheat oven at 350F. In a medium-size pot place the Piloncillo, cinnamon stick, cloves, and water. Place in the stove and melt in medium heat. ( If you have a hard time cutting the piloncillo for the amount needed, place it in your microwave for intervals of 30 seconds until it is softened enough to cut. Be careful while removing it out of the microwave since it gets extremely hot.)

Mix the melted butter with the oil and brush over the slices of bread. Place in a baking tray and bake 8 minutes and then turn over to bake 5 more minutes. The bread should have a deep golden color.
Start assembling the slices of bread in a round ovenproof dish. With the help of a ladle slowly pour syrup over the bread making sure the bread absorbs the syrup, do not let it go to the bottom of the dish in order to have enough syrup to moist all the bread pieces. Better yet dip the bread into the syrup to get an even moist crumb.

Top the first layer of bread with cheese, raisins, and peanut or any other fruit or nuts you would like to add according to the suggestions given above or your own.

Place another layer or bread and continue the process as in step 4.

Pour the remaining syrup over the last layer of bread and top with the cheese, raisins, and peanut. Dot with the 2 tablespoons of butter cut in small cubes. Cover with aluminum foil and bake in your preheated oven for 45 minutes until the top crust is golden and the lower layers are moist. Serve warm or cold.

Recipe Notes
some variations to this recipe:
• Fruits are also found in some recipes, the most common are fried plantain, bananas and apples.
• Prunes, cranberries, or other dried fruit are also used instead of the raisins, even shredded coconut.
• The same applies to the peanuts, any other nuts like almonds, pecans, walnuts, pine nuts are used.
• Other cheeses used as a substitute are Mexican Manchego, Monterrey Jack, and Mild White Cheddar and even parmesan mixed with Mexican Queso Fresco.

What Self-Care Looks Like (July 2016)

I know I've written about self-care before (and more than once) but I thought I'd give y'all an update on how that's going to keep myself accountable to what is and isn't working.

What is Working

• Learning more about introversion and being a highly sensitive person (HSP). I've been reading a couple of books on introversion (most notably Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World that Can't Stop Talking by Susan Cain and The Irresistible Introvert: Harness the Power of Quiet Charisma in a Loud World by Michaela Chung) as well as some articles on HSP that have helped embrace who I am and what works for me. Quiet has helped me understand what introversion is and what it isn't while The Irresistible Introvert (which is more like a memoir with tips on what's worked for the author) has given me ideas on how to best manage stressful (to introverts) situations. So far the latter has been highlighted, annotated, and been the most useful to me since I learn best from personal experiences. My anxiety and stress levels are at an all-time low thanks to the new techniques (as well as some I've picked up from implementing some mindfulness into my everyday routines).
• Embracing change. There have been a lot of changes lately (you can go back to last month's blog posts to see some example) and I've been able to accept them because I think I've finally learned to let go and let God guide me. Change doesn't make me uncomfortable but not knowing what's going to happen in the future has been a trigger for my anxiety attacks in the past. Now? I'm trusting God and am letting things come as they may without any long term plans in place. I have goals but no concrete plans as to how it'll happen. I'm re-learning to be more flexible which is something I was actually good at before the PTSD became a part of my life. I've also made some much needed changes in how I do things. For example, after reading both The Irresistible Introvert and an article on how multitasking actually depletes your mental energy, I've tried to do one thing at a time instead of trying to do several things at once. Right now I'm blogging without any music or the TV on in the background; I'm focused on this one single thing. While this is a small change for me, it's really helped my energy levels and mental sharpness.
• Taking screen-free breaks. As I've mentioned before, I've noticed how much better I feel and how much more (mentally and physically) energized I am when I'm not glued to a screen. I've taken a couple of screen-free breaks throughout the week. I let my friends (with whom I communicate the most often on social media and/or text) know ahead of time so they don't think I'm ignoring them. It's done wonders for my mental health; I can't recommend it enough.
• Drinking more water. Alright, 'fess up... who else has trouble drinking the recommended amount of water? After my bladder/kidney infection in late June-early July, I've been making an effort to drink more water. I try to aim for at least six 8 oz glasses per day and most days I'm able to reach that goal. Sometimes I fail on the six glasses but I do drink more than 16 oz of chamomile tea (for heartburn) or eat watermelon fruit bars (like popsicles but made out of actual fruit) so that helps keep me a little more hydrated. Added bonus: if I start off my day with at least 8-16 oz of water, I have a bit more energy during the day.
• Taking guilty pleasure breaks. If I feel myself getting stressed what do I do? Take a "guilty pleasure break." "What's that?" you may ask. It means that I'll do something that I enjoy for at least half an hour per day. It could be reading a book or watching a TV show that I'd be slightly embarrassed to admit that I read or watch but that makes me happy. If you're curious, let's just say it's usually aimed at a teen audience. Shh! lol.

What Isn't Working

• Not getting enough sleep. I've been averaging 4-6 hours most nights in the past couple of weeks. At first it was because the fever and infection weren't letting me sleep. Then the maintenance guys were here almost every day for about three straight weeks, not allowing me to sleep. Now it's just become a bad habit that I need to break before classes begin at the end of this month. This means sacrificing certain activities (such as reading one more chapter of a book or watching one more episode of a show I'm hooked on) but it'll be worth it for my health. I try to aim for 6-7.5 hours because I've noticed that that is what works best for me and my mental sharpness.
• Not listening to what food my body craves. I won't sugar coat it -- I've been eating lousy (yet delicious) food lately. My diet has consisted of a lot of fast, greasy foods which is why my heartburn has been terrible lately. When I see certain foods, my (literal) gut reaction is "ugh, no more" but sometimes it's all that's available so I eat it... and then suffer the consequences. I've also not eaten at times because we run out of food and I can't get to a grocery store because it's too hot outside (and I had no working a/c in my car for most of the summer thus far). With my stomach as sensitive as it has been lately, I'm going to make a list of which fruits and vegetables work (in terms of the acidity my stomach can handle and which foods I'm not allergic to) so I can incorporate more of them into my diet.
  
• Not attending confession or Mass for the past 5 weeks. Yes, I know, that's a mortal sin. I have my excuses but it still doesn't feel right. Not only that but not going to confession has had the unfortunate consequence of bad habits popping up again. Since I'm no longer sick like I was early last month, the Sand Fire is no longer an issue (we were advised to stay home because of the air quality being poor and our parish is only a couple of miles from where it was), and since the heat wave we had (which peaked at around 115 degrees or so and left me indoors for 2 straight weeks) is over, I no longer have any excuses. This past weekend was the first on which we could attend Mass without the lack of a/c being a factor (since it was fixed) but both my mom and I didn't feel well enough to attend Mass (she had painful arthritis that not even painkillers helped with and I had a stomach issue which seems to have peaked yesterday). I was kind of miffed that I couldn't attend this weekend after waiting for so long but I'm going to make sure I eat healthier so I don't have a repeat of this weekend. You guys don't know how much I've been wanting to go to both confession and Mass. We've even tried (and failed) to go during the week. It's a yearning at this point. I'm determined to make things right this weekend. Prayers that we're able to go to both, please?

Anyone (that I know offline) want to keep me accountable for any of the three things that I need to work in this month? I give you my permission to get on my case if needed. I'm serious.

That's it for now. I have the house to myself for only 2 more hours so I want to enjoy the silence and the slow pace while I still can. I love my mom but living with an uber-extroverted personality isn't easy when you're an introvert. I need to recharge my energy battery while I still can. :)

I hope y'all are having a lovely start of week!

As always, thanks for reading and God bless! :D

Lent with a Limited Diet

I can't fast during Lent. I couldn't fast before because of this hypoglycemic-type illness that I inherited from my mom, but I really can't fast these days because I need the calories. I am medically excused from fasting... and I'm actually also excused from abstaining from meat (as I was last year) because chicken is one of the few things I can eat without problems. Trust me, I asked a priest last year (I've had the same problem for a year and a half now) because of how limited my diet was/is and I was told that I can eat chicken if it's the only way that I can get my calories in. I need at least 1860 calories per day to gain weight, which is not easy if you can't eat all foods.

Before anyone starts listing what I "can" eat, saying that I have other options, please don't. I appreciate it but you guys don't know just how much I struggle with foods right now. I've tried high calorie every food I can think of and I've have problems with a number of them, mostly sensitivities to the foods that aren't quite allergies but bad enough for me to feel sick.

I can't eat fish because my tongue got a bit swollen the last time I tried it. I can't eat quinoa because it wrecks my stomach. I have some sensitivities to avocado so I can't eat 'em. Soy bloats me. Basically, I can't eat a number of things because of how bad my stomach currently is, most fruits included. I can't eat or drink any dairy or eggs because I have allergies to them. Trust me, I struggle to get my calories in on a daily basis so it's even more difficult during Lent so I am trying to stay away from chicken on Fridays.

Since I cannot fast, I have to find another form of penance... which has been not sleeping these days because of my PTSD. I actually did sort of do a form of penance yesterday for eating on Wednesday. I won't be able to do the same penance on Good Friday but I'll ask my spiritual director for some help. It's hard though. I don't like that I'm sort of excluded from participating in the fasting because of my stomach problems. Prior to my stomach problems, it was easier. I could eat pasta and other good foods. Now? I can't because of how acidic most of them are. It's a pain but it's what I have to go through.

I'm sharing this because of the comments about "not trying hard enough" or not wanting to "suffer" during Lent. It's off but, you know, some people who don't know will assume and I wanted to set the record straight. To recap: I am medically excused from fasting because of limited my diet is but I still try to stay away from meat unless it's the only way I can get my calories in. At the moment, I can get my calories in on Fridays without meat but if there's ever a chance that I can't, I know I'm good.

And, if you're wondering, yes, I will confess any meat consumed during Lent (such as on Ash Wednesday because I didn't have anything to eat... and I still came under my calorie count). I know I'm excused but I still feel guilty... in a good way. I say in a good way because I hope it means that I care.

Anyway, this is today's blog post. I was kind of stumped about what to write so I sort of wrote this on a quick whim. I'll try to think of better topics. ;)

I'll be back tomorrow... even if all I do is post some of my favorite Catholic themed memes found on tumblr. lol. ;)

As always, thanks for reading and God bless. :D

Incredibly Shrinking Nerd; Football (Soccer) and Faith.

I just noticed yesterday that my pants are no longer fitting me. In fact, I have to keep pulling them up because they're starting to get baggy. Grr! I am definitely not the type of person who wants to diet. In fact, I HATE diets and think they are pointless unless you have to lose weight because of health issues. I wonder what's going on with me. I bet it's because of the stress/anxiety. Grrr. I have a follow-up appointment at the doctor's this Friday (I had to go last Friday to get blood drawn) so maybe she can help me figure out what's up with my weight loss. I actually like the weight I am (or was before I started shrinking). I am going to guess I'm about a size 3-4 right now (this is U.S. Women's Sizes). I'm normally a 5-6 (7 with some jeans). Last time I lost so much weight was when I was 18 but I knew the cause for that, and, ironically it was around the time my dad was getting done with his chemo that time around. Hmm... grr. I am not a happy camper. I have a promise to myself not to drop below 120 pounds because, for my height, once I reach 118 I am considered underweight and I don't want that! Been there, hated it! I think I am going to grocery shopping in between all the errands I have in a couple of hours (it's, again, nearly midnight) and really stock up on food. Mmm... food. Which reminds me, I'm hungry. lol.

I actually took a break from writing my blog and went to make myself some instant oatmeal. It will be enough until I wake up in a few hours (early mass in the morning). It's not too heavy but have you ever tried going to sleep after eating a heavy meal? Not the best thing for your stomach. Okay, moving on from food (I have a feeling I will have a Jamie Oliver dream because of what I just wrote, haha)...

I saw something on Catholic Online that made me very happy. I read an article about how Nicola Legrottaglie, a defender on the Italian football (soccer) team Juventus, has shared how he will abstain from pre-marital sex. He said, and I am quoting the article, he is doing this... "not because I do not like women, but because I am waiting for the right woman with whom to have a family, a woman who shares the same values." All I have to say to that is ROCK ON! It takes a real man to speak up with and stand by what he believes. Though he didn't always do so, he's determine to not have sex until he gets married. I think it's awesome, and encouraging, to see someone who has strayed taking responsibility for what they've done and also show that they can get back on the right path.

Another very famous footballer (sorry to my fellow Americans but I can't bring myself to call footballers 'soccer stars') who has spoken out about how great it is to stay chaste is Brazil and AC Milan's Kaka. I have so much respect for him. He's probably the footballer I have the most respect for... and, as a Liverpool FC fan, that is saying something. lol. Although he is not Catholic, he is a very religious Christian who actually stayed a virgin until he married his wife. It would've been very easy for him to stray -- he's incredibly talented, very well known, he's very easy on the eyes (women everywhere are gaga over him) and he seems like the sweetest guy -- but he didn't cheat or do anything because of his faith. That is such a rare quality in, not only a footballer, but in a guy in today's society.

Sex is such a big deal today. Practically everyone talks about it, or thinks about it. Teens are losing their virginity younger and younger these days. It's becoming more rare and difficult to find people who are staying true to their faiths and staying pure until marriage. We don't hear many celebrities speaking out and sharing their abstinence. It's wonderful that people like Nicola and Kaka, who are part of the most famous sport in the world -- and are well known themselves, are sharing that part of their lives and showing people that, hey, it IS possible to stay a virgin until marriage. I also think it's inspiring to all their younger fans and hopefully, because of their statements, more and more people will follow in their footsteps. If you want to read the article I am talking about, click here. I think it's really worth it.

Alright, so, it's 3 minutes before midnight and I have to get up in 8 hours so I should end my blog here. As always, thanks for reading and God Bless.