Yes, I’m still alive. Ha!
I wanted to blog more this month as I’m sticking to my social media fast. I thought I would have the time I normally wasted on Instagram and Twitter. I thought I would be able to do things for Project 2005 in parts; that I wouldn’t have other things for it pop up. I thought I would have an “easy” month this month, with no doctor appointments and plenty of rest. Oh, how wrong I was.
The only reason why I’m currently in bed, typing this out, is because I spent the last three weeks in an unexpected “go, go, go” cycle in which I didn’t get much rest (or even much sleep) and I pushed myself — especially my body — beyond it’s limits. I can barely walk today after having a physically taxing day on Tuesday. I even had to reschedule blood work that was supposed to be done this afternoon. Yeah… I shouldn’t have done that. The pushing myself too much, I mean.
I obviously can’t get into details about Project 2005 but I will say that these first weeks of 2023 have been sort of amazing. I haven’t felt as productive or as myself as I have these weeks since my early 20s. It’s almost as if I didn’t have the health issues I have; as if I hadn’t experienced anything since my time at Santa Monica College (where I did part of my undergrad studies before transferring to a 4-year college). As weird as it sounds, it was like I had almost dreamt it all up and was now awake and living my reality… with the exception of the visual impairment and the strict medication schedule I have to maintain.
I believe a lot of that has to do with the fact that I haven’t been active on *any* social media platform for the first time in several years. Usually, I give up one or two at a time, but not all at once. As I shared in a previous post, I haven’t had a Facebook profile in a couple of months now. I had to start over with a new Instagram account in September. As for Twitter, it’s still there but I hadn’t logged in too often in the weeks prior to my self-exile from all social media. And this time away has been good for me because it solidified what I had suspected: I don’t actually need social media.
Yes, I do have FOMO, especially because I know I’m missing a lot. I have friends who I’m in regular, almost daily communication with and they’ll sometimes say, “Oh, yeah… I don’t think you saw that (post/reel/etc)…” or they’ll say something that makes it clear that they posted news or something somewhere and I didn’t get it because I’m not logged in. Thankfully, everything I need to know is always shared with me, even if I’m the last to know. And, that’s okay. I’ve also had to stop and think about what I want to share and with who instead of simply broadcasting it for all to read and hoping the “right people” see it.
I’ve been thinking, praying, and talking about the future of my social media presence and accounts with my spiritual director and close friends for several months now. Actually, this conversation started with my spiritual director at the end of last summer. He encouraged me to take some time to really think and pray on what God may be calling me to do with my accounts and I think I’ve come to a decision that has brought me peace and has only been confirmed by my time away from all platforms this month.
I will not be returning to Twitter in the foreseeable future. I will keep my account and I will share links to blog posts and the occasional prayer request via Hootsuite but I won’t be logging in after Candlemas. I’ll only log in to clean up the profile bio — and add that I only post via Hootsuite so no one expects a reply from me. I may return at some point but, as of now, I have chosen to stay away for the sake of my mental health.
As for Instagram, at the moment I plan to use it once a week to catch up on posts friends have shared during the week. I don’t know if that day of the week will be Wednesday or Sunday but it’ll be one day a week. I’ll manually check the accounts of whose content I want to keep up with by going directly to their profiles rather than using the feed. It’s the infinite scrolling and the auto play on the videos and reels that overwhelms me and ain’t nobody got time for that. I know I can disable auto play by using the webpage instead of the app so I’ll be doing that. I will still share posts and stories but even those will be no more than once a week. At the moment, I’m thinking of doing a monthly “photo dump” if I have things to share.
Of course, if I have major news to share, I will make an exception to share, especially if it’s time sensitive. And there may be some very exciting news coming up but, until then… *zip lips* I will most likely wait until the designated IG day to share the news as I’m regaining my ability to keep things to myself like I used to before I became a social media zombie. Wait, did I just confirm I’m keeping something from y’all? *nervous laughter* Oh, look! A squirrel! *runs away* Haha! Kidding! Of course I’m keeping something — the nature of Project 2005!
In all honesty, I wanted (and still want) to delete Twitter completely and only keep Instagram but there may be a reason why my Twitter account will be kept alive, at least for a couple more months. I may eventually set it to private and squat the username so no shenanigans are done. I’m well aware of the sad fact that there are people who want to do major damage and I want to avoid that.
Anyway, just wanted to write on why I’ve been MIA online. Just a lot of things that have happened. A last-minute house blessing and visit from two priests AND a new fridge within the first week of January. SO MANY new things in the last two weeks, some of which I hope to share in the next post as I want to share the rest in more detail. And there is still so much to come before the month ends.
Alright, I’m going to rest for a bit before a phone call from a parish friend. Yeah, I didn’t think getting “Hello” as my word of the year meant home visits from three different priests (one of them was my SD), a friend who is a Franciscan friar, and many others (who mask up (doctor’s orders) as well as more communication with my parish family and other friends within the first two months of the liturgical year. I welcome it. I may be an introvert but I very much need my community to survive the bed-ridden and flare up days.
I hope you are all doing well so far!
As always, thanks for reading and God bless! 😊
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