If you can't read the quote, it says: "For one pain endured with joy, we shall love the good God more forever." I knew my professors would read it while I gave my reports so... you know. ;) Appropriate, no? ;)
I won't make this blog post too long (I have work to do) but I will say that without her and Bl. Pier Giorgio Frassati, I don't think I would've made it out of the CINO college in one piece. Since it's her feast day today, I thought it would be appropriate to write about how she was there for me.
As most of you know, I had one heck of a bad time at the CINO college... especially during my first year there. I would often go to the chapel to pray either before or in between classes. I would be sad and frustrated and that made me crave some time with God. If I had the time (and the weather wasn't too hot, too rainy, or too cold), I would visit the St. Therese alcove set up near the chapel. The alcove is beautiful and one of my favorite places there. It's a bit rustic but you can see the city of Los Angeles in the background. Breathtaking scenery but heartbreaking problems with the professors caused many tears to be shed there.
I got into the habit of using her sacrifice beads while at that school. Every blasphemy and heresy the professors uttered (which I couldn't contest because either I wasn't given the chance or because I was so upset that I was having an anger induced panic attack) was offered up. On particularly bad days, I would count up to 50+ of them. I'm serious. Each time I would cringe (or cry; yes, I would cry in class on occasion), I remembered how much St. Therese silently suffered and that would give me some comfort.
Anyway, just wanted to share this with y'all. If you need a heavenly buddy when you're in a difficult situation (such as at a school or in a class with anti-Catholic teachings), St. Therese is wonderful. I learned a lot about how to handle those types of situations and my own spirituality grew as well. :D
Happy feast day, St. Therese of Lisieux... and thank you for all the flowers you've sent me during the last two years. :D
5 comments:
I've just found your blog through someone on twitter and was intrigued by your story about schooling and the CINO school you went to. After reading a few posts I felt compelled to ask for your advice, as I am in a similiar situation. I recently transferred from a non-Catholic to a Catholic university for this semester. Unknowingly, I thought I would enjoy being in a 'Catholic' environment and would make good Catholic friends which I feel I am really in need of. About a week before starting I was speaking to a man from Church who I knew went to the same uni I had transferred to, who questioned why I decided on this uni. He explained to me that there was a lot of 'dodgy' catechesis going on. Lots of CINO professors whose liberal ideas were so far removed from Church teaching it wasn't funny. Worried, I decided to go ahead and see if I could handle it. Now about 10 weeks into the semester I see what he was talking about, in my theology course the lecturer (who is a priest mind you) deviates from Church teaching so often it feels like he's teaching his own brand of Catholicism. Anyway, I can see that this will probably only get worse from here. (Apparantly there is a 'nun' who teaches that God is akin to Mother Earth or some other form of universal spirituality). I was looking forward to being able to frequent the sacraments until I found out they barely happen. Now here's my dilemma, I have the ability to transfer out of this uni to go to a new (orthodox, in-line with the Church) uni, or I could stay here and do my very best to defend the faith even though it would mean I'd probably be friendless and resentful plus I would need to do a lot of my own self-directed study to correct the incorrect things I will be taught. However I feel torn, like I am not really strong enough in my faith if I cannot remain here and fight for it and would rather surrender to a place where it would all be much easier...
Sorry I know this was really long but I am just in serious need of help right now, and while I continue to pray about it I still feel confused.
I had a priest and a couple of nuns who regularly taught uber liberal theology that goes against what the Church teaches. I know exactly what you're going through. Masses were rarely offered... and confessions even less often.
There were many times that I wanted to quit and transfer elsewhere because there are so many great truly Catholic schools out there. Like you, I didn't think (and still don't think) I was strong enough to defend the Faith.
There were a lot of factors that went into my decision to stay. Everyone (except one friend) told me to get out because I wouldn't get orthodox teachings... but the one friend who urged me to stay reminded me that I could learn from their side so that I could better defend the Faith by the time I was out. He was right; I know what they teach so I can build up my argument better. However, I suffered from the occasional low grade, virtually no friends, and the constant atrocities the professors threw at me.
Also, I told my dad I would take care of my mom and the only orthodox universities would be in other states or too far away to stay at home and take care of her. That played a huge role in my decision.
I say, keep praying. Ask St. Thomas Aquinas and Bl. Pier Giorgio Frassati for their intercessions and the Holy Spirit for guidance. I can't tell you what to do because it's your decision. I will say that, it's not easy but it can be worth it.
If you decide to stay and need someone to talk to, please feel free to contact me. I will be here for you. Either way, I will pray that God shows you where He wants you to be.
I love St. Therese and Pier Giorgio! Every Catholic young adult should know about them!
Emmy,
I can tell that is your shirt by the Emmy Cecilia font.
Praying for you.
LOL. There's an Emmy Cecilia font, Fr. Kyle? And, thank you for your prayers. :)
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