First, as some of you may know, I recently did a St. Thomas Aquinas novena regarding grad school. If you've read this blog long enough, you know that I had been struggling to figure out what to do about grad school since before I graduated last year. Did I want to follow up my Religious Studies BA with a Master's in Theology? Did I want to follow my dream of being a writer and pursue a MFA in Creative Writing? I was torn between the two and, up until a few weeks ago, I was still undecided. Then I was inspired by the son of one of my dearest friends (Kathryn) to look into becoming a Speech Therapist. Well, I technically had a dream that I was visiting her family and had told her that I wished I was a therapist so I could help her, but it was enough to trigger the curiosity in me. After one of my Godmothers brought it up (without knowing that I was considering it), I really looked into it and it all sort of clicked for me.
Up until my father's death, I often talked how I had wished I had the stomach to become a doctor or even a nurse. I can handle some things but blood and seeing open cuts and wounds will make me faint. That's why I ruled that out early on. However, I've always wanted to help people out somehow. Then, as I said, it clicked for me. My mom and my uncle have stutters. Three of my best friends have children with autism. This is something I could do to really help people. I definitely have the patience, the heart to help, and it suits my personality. I even checked out my personality profile (I'm an INFP) for kicks and, sure enough, Speech Pathologist is on the list. So, after all of the things I've explained (as well as a lot of prayer), I've decided to change careers. I will always write but I think I'll be more comfortable writing my own novels and articles on the side and have Speech-Language Pathology as my main career.
It wasn't easy to get to this decision. Freelance writing is incredibly unstable. I knew that when I started last year. While I have really enjoyed some of my assignments (I'll always make time to write for H&R Block; side note: my latest post for them was published today), overall, I've been unhappy. I love writing but I figured out a few weeks back that (except for my H&R Block assignments, as well as those I've written for Envoy Magazine), most of my work has left me feeling empty and like I'm wasting my time. I no longer feel as though this is what God has planned for me. Sure, Speech Pathology pays a lot more (which is why I hesitated on the decision; I didn't want to make it based on greed or anything like that) but that's not why I want to do it. I just think that what I have to offer the world would be better spent helping others than writing about which movies are currently playing "On Demand" for a cable company I personally ditched two weeks ago.
Along with the change of career, I've also decided to relocate. I've been wanting to move out of Los Angeles since, I kid you not, I was about 6 years old and I'll hopefully (finally!) get a chance to as I pursue this journey. All of the grad programs I want to apply to are in colder climates, which works for me; I'm sick of the hot weather. I will apply to a program here as well but I'm considering that as my backup. I am sure God will help guide me exactly where He wants me to be.
All of this has made me rely more on my faith, wanting to do God's will, and take my own feelings out of the equation. I loathe math with every fiber of my being but I'm going to have to get over it because I need at least one more upper division math class to take. As far as schools go, (from what I know) there are no orthodox Catholic universities that offer a SLP Masters degree. Not happy about that (would've loved to have attended a good Catholic uni) but maybe it's what I need to strengthen my faith. Also, a lot of the universities on the top of my list are in very liberal cities, which is going to be fun. Yes, there was a hint of sarcasm when I wrote that last sentence. lol. I definitely have my pick of the university I would love to attend, and the city in which it is in is my ideal to live in, but it's not about what I want. Again, it's about God's will and what He would like me to do. I just have to surrender any selfish desires and trust Him. I'm going to immerse myself in more prayer over the next couple of months (I'll be applying this autumn to begin during Fall 2014) and go from there.
I know that all these changes will alter a lot of things in my life. I will have to leave behind my comfort zone. I'm going to have to challenge myself in ways I wasn't anticipating. Overall, I'm hoping that my resolution to trust God completely and not worry about the future will prove to be a success because, as I wrote last month, it's never been easy for me to completely let go in the past. A new career. A new place to live in (I've lived at the same address for the past 22 years). And I will possibly have to do this by myself, without anyone there to help me. *gulp*
Anyway, just wanted to share this. If y'all can spare a prayer, I'd grateful appreciate it. :D
Sorry for the long post but, well, you guys know I love to write a little too much sometimes. lol.
I hope y'all have a great start of the weekend. :D If you have any prayer requests, please send them by way. :D
As always, thanks for reading and God bless!