Thursday, November 23, 2017

Gratitude in Difficult Times

I know some of you might've gotten worried about what I wrote in yesterday's blog post but I promise you that I'll be okay. Writing is how I let things off my chest; it's a way for me to let go of the negative in the healthiest way possible (that doesn't involve crying). Yes, it was done on a public platform but I've always felt the need to be open and honest with everyone because not many people share their struggles... and sometimes we all need to know we're not alone. (side note: you won't believe the number of times I've gotten messages saying "I thought I was the only one who felt that way/went through that!")

Today, I'm going to give you the other side of my thought process because I always tend to look at things from every side of the problems. This is not a full list but it'll give you an idea of the silver linings I find in difficult moments like the ones I described in yesterday's post.

I'm grateful for a mother who never quits. We have our difficulties (as do all mother-daughter relationships), our different temperaments, and way different communication styles but Mom is like a Goonie... she never says die!

I'm grateful for my brothers who, as we get older, are more and more involved in my life. I didn't have that closeness with them growing up since I grew up as a virtual only child (they're all older half-siblings).

I'm grateful for friends who give me advice, support me, and help me in any way they can. Whether it be anxiety, health, or school-related stress... whether it's a guy problem... whether I'm just having an awful day, someone is always there to help pick me up again.

I'm grateful for the miracle of passing some of my exams and coursework, especially when I think I've tanked them. It's really weird but I've found that the more I study, the worse I do on exams. It's just something I recently realized.

I'm grateful for the insight about the less study time = better grade. Holy Spirit double whammy FTW!

I'm grateful for professors who understand my health problems and even send me encouraging words when I feel like giving up. I've never had such a supportive professor (who sends me motivating compliments) than the one I have this semester... for the second hardest course in the program.

I'm grateful for the opportunity to study, period. Sure, I'm up to my eyeballs in student loans but at least I have the chance to study. The same can't be said for others in different parts of the world.

I'm grateful for the doctor I had up until this past June. It was thanks to her that we figured out where part of my health problems came from and it helped me start my path back to recovery. Yes, I hit a major snag again this month but at least I know that she starts the ball rolling on this whole thing.

I'm grateful for answers. Even if it's not what I want to hear, getting answers is always a good thing because then you can try to figure out what to do next.

I'm grateful for you lovely readers who have kept reading this blog, even if I shut down my nearly 3,000+ follower Twitter account and only have 18 people following on the new Twitter account... even if I keep losing readers on the blog's FB page every week (and I have been)... even if you all decide to never read this blog again, your kind words and prayers have helped keep me going all these years.

I'm grateful to all the saints in Heaven who've interceded for me, especially this year.

Lastly (but most importantly), I'm grateful to God for literally everything, even the bad. I may feel like I'm drowning... broken... unloved/unlovable... weak... but it's during these times that I can feel closer to God than when I'm well. I may not always "feel" like I'm in a good place with Him but we all know the devil loves to try to trip you up when you're at your lowest and can do so by playing with your emotions. I know that, deep down, my love for Him will never fade... no matter how low I may feel. I know that He will make sure someone will always help me get back if I ever fall (as I did in my teens).

What are you all grateful for?

I hope all you lovely fellow Americans have a lovely Thanksgiving Day weekend!

Thanks for reading and God bless! :D

1 comment:

AnneMarie said...

This is awesome, and I'm especially glad to hear about the supportive professor-that's so epic!!!! What a huge gift. I love how you turn things to look at what you're grateful for. It's something I try to remember when I have difficult relationships with other people or struggles I'm going through, that there is always something to be thankful for in that person or struggle!