Monday, June 11, 2012

Post-Grad Slump

<-- That is how I wish I could feel but I don't. It's been a little over a month since I graduated from college and I've already found myself in a post-grad slump.

See, this is the first time that I've never had anything to do since I was a child. I went to school (albeit on and off) for 24 years. I took care of my father until he passed away. After he passed away, I took a new role in the family (taking on some of his responsibilities) but now we've got our new routine down pat so no need to try to perfect it. With no jobs prospects (trust me, I'm looking) I find myself feeling both bored and useless.

Sure, I do the whole housewife thing... without being an actual housewife. I cook and clean. I've gotten so good at cleaning the house that it can be done in half an hour or less. I get everything done quickly and early -- chores, errands, etc. Once all of that is done, I have way too much time on my hands and I have absolutely no idea what to do to fill the time.

I read. A lot. I go to the library an average of once a week, twice on a slow week. I've been working on my novel but I try not to do it for hours or else my eyes and head hurt from staring at the screen for so long. I dance around like the massive dork that I am when I'm home alone to get some of my exercise in. I attend Mass in the mornings when I can get my tired tush out of bed on time. I drive my mom to work in the pre-dawn hours and pick her up early in the afternoon. Beyond that, I have nothing to do.

It's strange for me not to have anything to do. To be honest, I feel kind of useless -- to the point where I feel a bit depressed. What can I do? Jobs aren't easy to come by. I love writing and my imaginative mind has been in overdrive the last couple of weeks but that doesn't generate any income. This all just really stinks.

Just wondering, what have some of you (who have been in my shoes) done during this post-grad slump? I mean, sure I can work on my grad school applications (at least one is due before summer is over) but I need to do something productive with my time. What I've been doing to busy myself has not been fulfilling. By the way, no volunteer work suggestions. Trust me, without a job I can't drive too far (no money for gas and L.A. is quite spread out) and any local places that I would normally go to need a once a month volunteer).

Anyone want to help a sister out?

6 comments:

katie said...

Hello! I'm in the same boat as you.. I just graduated and have a whole lot of time on my hands. All of the things you said you've been doing are things that I've done, but I definitely also have felt a bit useless and depressed, and in my case, rather lonely (I'm alone most of the day). It's strange going from the craziness of school to doing basically nothing. I don't know where you live, but getting outside is something I've been trying to do a little more. Hiking, biking, four-wheeling, or just taking a walk around the neighborhood :)

Melissa Cecilia said...

I live in a rather shady neighborhood in Los Angeles so I try to stay indoors or outdoors if it's in a safe enough neighborhood.

Anonymous said...

If I were you, I'd be patient. When I've gone through transitions like this, I found that things to do will present themselves. When I tried to force a solution for something to do, I almost always ended up frustrated with myself.

Melissa Cecilia said...

Thanks for the advice on being patient but, trust me, you don't have to tell me that. I've been told I have patience to spare. :) This isn't an issue of patience. With my anxiety disorder, I NEED to be constantly occupied which is why I wrote this post. When I have too much time on my hands, my anxiety tends to increase. My mind needs to be constantly busy.

Anonymous said...

I remember going through that slump (especially since my job at that time never gave me any hours!) It drove me crazy. I spent so much time on Facebook or watching TV. And being inside all the time just made my depression worse. (But I refused to go out in the Louisiana heat!)

Mass and reading are always awesome, I'll agree with you there. :) What about crafty stuff? Is there something you've always wanted to learn to do, like play an instrument, or knit, or something else? I started experimenting with ribbons and beads during my summer of nothing, and now I'm gearing up to open my own Etsy jewelry/rosary store.

Hopefully you'll find something that'll help fill the time and keep you from going stir-crazy. Good luck!

~Zanne

Manny said...

when I graqduated amny years ago, I was lucky to have gotten a job, and within a few months started and was shocked at how different the work world was from the school world. I would keep working on that novel, continue to learn how to improve one's writing, and read some of the works that resonated in you when you read them in school. That's my humble advice.