If you had the choice to attend a school where you were comfortable at and would be receiving a great amount to attend, but knew you would struggle to stay morally and spiritually right, would you stay? If you had the alternative of attending another school where you would have a hard time in terms of financial aid and stress, but knew that you would be able to stay on the right path, would you rather go there? These were the questions that I had/have to deal with.
I was excited about attending school A (where I was comfortable) but I was noticing that, though I tried to stay as righteous as I could, I would struggle. In the first 2 days that I went to my courses at school A, I was very surprised at how quickly I'd fallen back into the routine I had when I first attended said school. This was prior to my coming back to the Church. I swore like a sailor (and I'm ashamed of that). It was a lot easier for me to say the Lord's name in vain (even though I didn't really think about doing it). I think that's what the problem was... I didn't think my actions through before I did them. I caught myself MANY TIMES coming very close to saying the Lord's name in vain this past week. All unintentionally but, ugh, I hate doing that. Thankfully, I was able to stop myself. I saw myself going back to the way I was and I refuse to be that person again. I've worked very hard to get where I am now. Not only that, I simply don't want to offend God in any way, shape, or form. I have too much love and respect for Him and the Church to do that. That meant I had to do the hard thing and leave a place of comfort to go somewhere I would be humbled.
Last night, I dropped all my courses and decided to go back to school B where I was at last fall. Everyone's pretty shocked that I did this because I've always said that I completely disliked school B but I feel like it's for the best. I will have financial aid issues with school B but I would rather get little to no financial aid than to compromise my beliefs and turn myself back to who I was then. At school A, I would be taking my Philosophy and Religious Studies courses with mostly ultra-liberal professors (with the exception of the Philosophy of Religion class I was taking). At school B, I am more free to express my beliefs about God and about faith without the professors penalizing me for it. And, at school B I know that I can stay on the path that I was going down on, which is a path of prayer, without it being such an issue like it was at school A. I don't think I ever swore/cursed at any point when I attend school B.
The argument that I could be at either school and just really work hard at not straying has come up in my mind. I completely agree... but I also think that I'm still learning how to stay on the right path. I'm very strong willed and all but there are some things I still need to work on and going to school A would just set me back.
I see it this way -- for example: Let's say you're completely bored and want to go see a movie. Film A (which represent school A) is a very mature rated R movie that you could go watch for free, and you'll even get free popcorn and a drink. You know it would be bad for you because of the content but you say to yourself that it's just a movie; no big deal. You'll just cover your eyes during certain scenes. Now, let's say Film B (school B) is a tame, rated G movie that you have to pay your last $20 to see. You know that you'll be broke if you see it but know that the content won't be unsuitable. With Film A, you can try to cover your eyes but there's always the temptation and the possibility of watching the icky scenes in a moment of weakness. With Film B, yes, you'll be broke but you won't feel guilty afterward and won't have to go to confession for it. Which would you choose? Hopefully, Film B... which is what I did. I would rather have to work hard physically and mentally to keep myself ahead (and basically be broke) than to work hard to keep myself spiritually and morally right with many temptations around. It's easier to fall in situation/film/school A than it is in B.
So, now I will have yet another first day of school when I return to school B next Wednesday. I already have my courses set, and I've spoken to professors who have vowed to help me out (I have an amazing English Lit professor) in case I need it. I'm armed with my Rosary and novena so I am not going to stress out, and am surprisingly anxiety and stress free -- SERIOUSLY!, because I have faith that God will help me if I truly need it. This is yet another one of those obstacles that I have to get through to become a better person.
Okay, I think I've bored y'all enough with my little situation. lol. I hope to have time to write quite a bit soon. I STILL have a blog I'm planning so keep your eyes out for it.
I will be praying for of all you who are going back to school. Anyone else counting down the days 'til Christmas break? I already am. Hahaha. :D
As always, thanks for reading and God Bless. :D
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Showing posts with label Philosophy of Religions. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Philosophy of Religions. Show all posts
Thursday, August 28, 2008
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Back to School: St. Thomas Aquinas and St. Joseph of Cupertino.
Yes, it's that time of year most student dread: Back to school. It's not as bad as midterms and finals week for us college students but it's up there. I was VERY excited, and very nervous, about attending my first day back to school because it's my first time in years since I've had to go on campus for courses. I'm extremely happy to report that I did not have a panic attack or anything. NOTHING. I asked St. Dymphna for her intercession regarding my anxiety, and St. Joseph of Cupertino and St. Thomas Aquinas for their intercession regarding my courses. I feel like they all came through from me (as well as St. Jude Thaddeus and Our Lady of Guadalupe whom were also asked for their intercession by other people). :D
I am loving my Philosophy of Religions professor. She's awesome. The syllabus and what she said we would study is right up my alley. My pseudo-brother/bodyguard is also taking the course with me so I'm going to have back up if needed. I hope that I will enjoy the class. I'm certainly excited.
(WARNING: Skip over the following paragraph to the next if you are squeamish or under the age of 18)
I'm not excited about my History of Religions professor. The course is really good but he's very nutty and makes me feel uncomfortable. Do you want to take a professor who, on the first day, says things like "I know some of you would probably want to cut your veins open (or go to a corner and shoot up some heroin) than be in classes with boring teachers"? He also said we could all go to *ahem* if we didn't want to be in the class and how if he saw that we were all lagging in energy he would tell us to... well, I won't repeat it. Needless to say, I am hoping that I can crash another course because I am NOT going to be comfortable in that class. Oh, and I got many looks when I said I was Roman Catholic. It was like I was a lamb in a Lion's den. Unfortunately, both professors that teach the History of Religions course are notorious for being neither very difficult or ultra-liberal so I am going to have to wait until someone else teaches it to take it. I cannot drop it just yet because I have to stay at full time student status and if I drop it without getting another course, I will be ineligible for financial aid.
I should've totally taken the little accident before the professor came in the class as a sign. First I couldn't find my class even though I passed by 3 times. Then, when I went to sit down, the desk was loose and it pinched the side of my left arm, in a very sensitive spot, and I got the most painful bruise as a result. It still hurts more than 24 hours later. Now, I'm not the most graceful person (haha, understatement of the century) but I have never had that happen to me. I even thought "Oh, I'm not going to think of this as a sign that I'm going to hate this course." And then the professor opened his mouth, said what he said, and I'm totally not happy. Maybe it was a sign from above that I needed to run, not walk, out of that class while I still could. Well, I am hoping for the best (to find a class) and will be optimistic. :D
I want to let all you students, who read this blog, about St. Joseph of Cupertino and St. Thomas Aquinas.
Odds are you are more acquainted with St. Thomas Aquinas because he's the patron saint of students and colleges. He was an amazing theologian. I learned about him in my introduction to Philosophy class last year (summer 2007) and he was probably the best philosopher that we covered in the second half of the course, if not the entire course. If you have any school issues, he's a great saint to pray to for his intercession.
Another great saint that will help you out, especially during exams, is St. Joseph of Cupertino. Sometimes I mistaken call him John; I'm still getting used to his name. Anyway, he was not the best student in school but he still had a vast knowledge on spiritual matters. You can read more about him here. If you say one of the following prayers during exams, he will never let you down.
Prayer #1
O Great St. Joseph of Cupertino who while on earth did obtain from God the grace to be asked at your examination only the questions you knew, obtain for me a like favour in the examinations for which I am now preparing. In return I promise to make you known and cause you to be invoked.
Through Christ our Lord.
St. Joseph of Cupertino, Pray for us.
Amen.
Prayer #2
O St. Joseph of Cupertino who by your prayer obtained from God to be asked at your examination, the only preposition you knew. Grant that I may like you succeed in the (here mention the name of Examination eg. History paper I ) examination.
In return I promise to make you known and cause you to be invoked.
O St. Joseph of Cupertino pray for me
O Holy Ghost enlighten me
Our Lady of Good Studies pray for me
Sacred Head of Jesus, Seat of divine wisdom, enlighten me.
ALWAYS REMEMBER that when you succeed in the exams then you should thank St. Joseph of Cupertino by recommending him to other students with upcoming exams, or students in general.
Alright, well, I have copies to make and things to read for my Philosophy course. I hope to write often, though we'll see how much free time I'll actually have. My schedule's pretty packed this semester. :D
Good luck to everyone heading back to school! :D
As always, thanks for reading and God Bless!
.
I am loving my Philosophy of Religions professor. She's awesome. The syllabus and what she said we would study is right up my alley. My pseudo-brother/bodyguard is also taking the course with me so I'm going to have back up if needed. I hope that I will enjoy the class. I'm certainly excited.
(WARNING: Skip over the following paragraph to the next if you are squeamish or under the age of 18)
I'm not excited about my History of Religions professor. The course is really good but he's very nutty and makes me feel uncomfortable. Do you want to take a professor who, on the first day, says things like "I know some of you would probably want to cut your veins open (or go to a corner and shoot up some heroin) than be in classes with boring teachers"? He also said we could all go to *ahem* if we didn't want to be in the class and how if he saw that we were all lagging in energy he would tell us to... well, I won't repeat it. Needless to say, I am hoping that I can crash another course because I am NOT going to be comfortable in that class. Oh, and I got many looks when I said I was Roman Catholic. It was like I was a lamb in a Lion's den. Unfortunately, both professors that teach the History of Religions course are notorious for being neither very difficult or ultra-liberal so I am going to have to wait until someone else teaches it to take it. I cannot drop it just yet because I have to stay at full time student status and if I drop it without getting another course, I will be ineligible for financial aid.
I should've totally taken the little accident before the professor came in the class as a sign. First I couldn't find my class even though I passed by 3 times. Then, when I went to sit down, the desk was loose and it pinched the side of my left arm, in a very sensitive spot, and I got the most painful bruise as a result. It still hurts more than 24 hours later. Now, I'm not the most graceful person (haha, understatement of the century) but I have never had that happen to me. I even thought "Oh, I'm not going to think of this as a sign that I'm going to hate this course." And then the professor opened his mouth, said what he said, and I'm totally not happy. Maybe it was a sign from above that I needed to run, not walk, out of that class while I still could. Well, I am hoping for the best (to find a class) and will be optimistic. :D
I want to let all you students, who read this blog, about St. Joseph of Cupertino and St. Thomas Aquinas.
Odds are you are more acquainted with St. Thomas Aquinas because he's the patron saint of students and colleges. He was an amazing theologian. I learned about him in my introduction to Philosophy class last year (summer 2007) and he was probably the best philosopher that we covered in the second half of the course, if not the entire course. If you have any school issues, he's a great saint to pray to for his intercession.
Another great saint that will help you out, especially during exams, is St. Joseph of Cupertino. Sometimes I mistaken call him John; I'm still getting used to his name. Anyway, he was not the best student in school but he still had a vast knowledge on spiritual matters. You can read more about him here. If you say one of the following prayers during exams, he will never let you down.
Prayer #1
O Great St. Joseph of Cupertino who while on earth did obtain from God the grace to be asked at your examination only the questions you knew, obtain for me a like favour in the examinations for which I am now preparing. In return I promise to make you known and cause you to be invoked.
Through Christ our Lord.
St. Joseph of Cupertino, Pray for us.
Amen.
Prayer #2
O St. Joseph of Cupertino who by your prayer obtained from God to be asked at your examination, the only preposition you knew. Grant that I may like you succeed in the (here mention the name of Examination eg. History paper I ) examination.
In return I promise to make you known and cause you to be invoked.
O St. Joseph of Cupertino pray for me
O Holy Ghost enlighten me
Our Lady of Good Studies pray for me
Sacred Head of Jesus, Seat of divine wisdom, enlighten me.
ALWAYS REMEMBER that when you succeed in the exams then you should thank St. Joseph of Cupertino by recommending him to other students with upcoming exams, or students in general.
Alright, well, I have copies to make and things to read for my Philosophy course. I hope to write often, though we'll see how much free time I'll actually have. My schedule's pretty packed this semester. :D
Good luck to everyone heading back to school! :D
As always, thanks for reading and God Bless!
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