Mona Lisa Smile and Feminism

I know, I know... the movie Mona Lisa Smile is considered "old" by most people who are used to only seeking out the latest and greatest but it's only 13 years old. I've been watching (and re-watching) it over and over on Netflix. In fact, I think I've had it on my list since it first became available to stream. I couldn't quite figure out why I loved it so much -- other than it taking place during one of my favorite eras with all that lovely music and fashion -- until I watched it for the thousandth time (only a slight exaggeration) and I figured it out: it challenges the idea of what a feminist looks like. Oh, and if you didn't figure it out: spoilers ahead.

For those who haven't seen it, this is the gist of the movie: Julia Roberts plays Katherine Watson, an art history professor from California who goes to teach at the ultra-conservative Wellesley College in 1953. She causes quite a ruckus with her liberal views; she's an unmarried, 30 year-old who sees marriage as something that traps women and hinders them from reaching their full potential. She challenges her students' traditional views on art as well as, you guessed it, marriage. Most students like her except one who openly criticizes her for having affairs (including one with a male teacher at the college), being unmarried at 30, and being "subversive."

The film is as much about the teacher as it is about her students. Betty Warren (played by Kirsten Dunst) is the conservative poster girl and not the nicest gal in the bunch. She's the one who continuously clashes with Katherine Watson. She marries about halfway through the film and wants the same for her best friend, Joan Brandwyn. Joan (who is played by Julia Stiles) is an academic overachiever who is dating Tommy (played by Topher Grace), a Yale man. When Ms. Watson learns that she wouldn't mind going to Yale Law School (back when they only accepted a handful -- literally like 5-6 -- of women into the program), she encourages Joan to apply. Connie Baker (played by Ginnifer Goodwin) is a kind hearted gal who just wants to find love. Her best friend, Giselle Levy (played by Maggie Gyllenhaal), is the experienced gal in the group, having affairs with married men. She finds Ms. Watson fascinating as she embodies the type of person she would like to be. Unsurprisingly, she (Giselle) and Betty often clash because Giselle represents everything Betty hates. Again, this is just the gist of it.

Now, you can look at the film, watch it, and go: "Why do you like this movie, Emmy? They're basically saying that being conservative and having a traditional outlook on life is bad." Yes, it looks that way. Betty ends up being challenged enough by Ms. Watson that she understands where she's coming from. She eventually divorces her cad of a husband and has plans to move into an apartment with Giselle in Greenwich Village after graduation. I can hear the "haha, the ultra-conservative failed! Traditionalism needs to get with the times! Let women do what they want; let them sleep around and not get married because x, y, z" comments. It would seem that way except for my favorite part of the movie: Joan redefines what it means to be a feminist.

I realized that I loved this movie because of what Joan did -- she stood up to Ms. Watson in her own way and helped me realize that feminism comes in different forms. See, Joan does end up getting into Yale Law. Betty is upset by this but Ms. Watson is thrilled... that is, until she finds out that Tommy has other plans. He plans for Joan to join him in Philadelphia since he will be going to Penn State for graduate school. Ms. Watson, fearing the worse for Joan, goes to Joan's house and to tell her she's found other law schools nearby. That's when Joan drops the bomb: she's eloped with Tommy. Ms. Watson turns to leave, disappointed by the development, but Joan stops her. This is my favorite part of the movie:

Joan Brandwyn: It was my choice, not to go. He would have supported it.
Katherine Watson: But you don't have to choose!
Joan Brandwyn: No, I have to. I want a home, I want a family! That's not something I'll sacrifice.
Katherine Watson: No one's asking you to sacrifice that, Joan. I just want you to understand that you can do both.
Joan Brandwyn: Do you think I'll wake up one morning and regret not being a lawyer?
Katherine Watson: Yes, I'm afraid that you will.
Joan Brandwyn: Not as much as I'd regret not having a family, not being there to raise them. I know exactly what I'm doing and it doesn't make me any less smart. This must seem terrible to you.
Katherine Watson: I didn't say that.
Joan Brandwyn: Sure you did. You always do. You stand in class and tell us to look beyond the image, but you don't. To you a housewife is someone who sold her soul for a center hall colonial. She has no depth, no intellect, no interests. You're the one who said I could do anything I wanted. This is what I want.

Boom. Mic drop. Point, Joan Brandwyn, err... Joan Donegal. I do a little fist pump in the air every time Joan give this speech. Because she's right. Let's say it was the acceptable norm in the 1950s but in the 2000s -- and especially in 2016 -- but it's looked at as being archaic.

As some of you longtime readers may know, I took a Women's Studies course as a freshman in college. The professor I had reminds me a lot of Katherine Watson, except that she was a lot more, um, liberal. That's the nicest way I can say that. She talked about pornography very openly. Every time she said something that she thought would shock me -- which was often -- she would apologize to me in class... but it honestly didn't feel sincere to me. It was very odd to me (at the time) that she would do that because I was, well, on the more liberal side of the political spectrum at the time. I was indifferent to a lot of things I now oppose. Still, it's curious that she saw a more conservative/traditional side to me than I thought I displayed at that time.

Anyway, I considered myself a feminist at the time (circa 2004-2005; a year or two after Mona Lisa Smile was released). I was all for equality in terms of women having the same opportunities as men in things such as the workplace. Still, I acknowledged that there were things that men could do that women couldn't, and vice versa. This was like a year or two before my reversion, many years before I first heard of Theology of the Body. I didn't drink all the Women's Studies Kool-aid given to us in that course but I could see validity to certain points made.

Fast-forward over a decade later. At 30 -- and as someone who identifies herself as a more "traditional" Catholic -- I'm obviously at a different place in my life. I'm no longer that apathetic (nominally Catholic in name only) 19-20 year-old freshman (side note: I took a break between HS and college to work while my father battled colon cancer for the first time) who wasn't sure she wanted more than a child or two, if any. I obviously don't identify myself as a liberal nor am I registered Democrat any longer. Still, I think of myself as a feminist in the Joan Brandwyn sense.

Reverting to the faith definitely shaped how I view femininity and feminism in general. I'm obviously pro-life, which is not a "typical feminist" idea. I'm excited about the prospect of marriage and children some day. I think that women who stay at home with their children don't differ that much from working mothers -- the only difference is what kind of work they do during the day; both demanding yet rewarding regardless of where their time is spent. I have a preference for myself but don't judge or disagree with anyone else who chooses to go down the other career/small-v vocation path. I see the beauty in being a woman, something I never did when I was considered myself a "feminist" a decade ago.

I'm grateful for the opportunities I've gotten "despite" being a woman. I've gotten a great (and extensive) education. I've studied a number of subjects in depth. I've been able to fulfill a lifelong dream of being published as an author. I've been able to do my dream job (writing) only to find out that it was incompatible with where I was in my life at the time. I still enjoy shocking men when they see me working on my car (I picked up a thing or two from my father... and YouTube tutorials, lol) or doing something that is traditionally associated with men. What can I say? My parents raised a fiercely independent woman who likes to do things for myself when I'm able. I'm grateful for the opportunities I've gotten to be selfish and choose my path (with guidance from God).

I've chosen this path of Biblical Theology because it seems to be the path that God wants me to take. The path is becoming clearer as I make progress down it (and it looks like I may have one or two new, life-changing projects coming up later this year). I've chosen to wait for that man that God has in store for me despite the offers to, ahem, experience the world more. I've chosen to hand everything over to God -- my vocations (as a future mother, wife, and whatever career path He's leading me towards), my ambitions, my hopes, my dreams, my health, everything -- since I know He will do better for me than I can ever do for myself. I'm prepared to either be a working mother or a stay-at-home mother; to balance marriage, family, and work. Finally, I've chosen to embrace the beauty that comes with being a woman -- all the ups and downs -- and help other women see that same beauty in themselves. If you ask me, that's what a feminist is really about.

And that's it for my long, rambling post on everything I took out of the movie. Since I'm cutting Netflix this week, I should really get myself the movie so I can watch it as many times as my heart desires. ;)

Alright, I'm going to try to enjoy the rest of my weekend. Perhaps I'll bake a cake and watch some more Netflix since studying has been impossible this weekend thanks to my loud neighbors and terrible concentration. :D

I hope y'all have a lovely rest of weekend. :D

As always, thanks for reading and God Bless! :D

Giveaway Winners; Feminism, Part One.

Note: Started this post two weeks ago but haven't been able to finish and post it until today -- May 28, 2009.

Thank you to all who participated in the St. Dymphna giveaway. If you won, I've already contacted you via Twitter because all the winners entered through Twitter. :D And, to be fair, I'll post the answers.

For the Rosary Chaplet:
1) I've mentioned St. Dymphna MANY times in this blog before. How many entries have I mentioned her name, in one way or another? 34 Entries
2) What was the entry (post) name in which I included scanned photos of a St. Dymphna's prayer card? Go Liverpool!; Anxiety and Catholicism, St. Dymphna (It's the entry most of the google searches landed on prior to the Fr. Alberto Cutié scandal.)
3) Which fellow saint helped St. Dymphna during her escape (and was also martyred with her)? St. Gerebernus

For the Prayer Cards:
1) Where is St. Dymphna originally from? Clogher, Ireland (I'm going to be there very, very soon)
2) Where was she martyred? Gheel, Belgium.
3) What is she the patron saint of (besides anxiety)? Insomnia, Sleepwalking, Mental Health, Epilepsy, Neurological Disorders, Psychologists, Therapists, Possessed People, Princesses, Loss of Parents, Family Happiness, Rape Victims, Incest Victims, Runaways.

Again, congrats to all the winners. :)

While I'm still discussing St. Dymphna, let me just say what a great inspiration she and saints like St. Maria Goretti are for young women. They also, with the other female saints and, of course, our Blessed Virgin Mary are the true defintion of the word "feminist."

I recently wrote an essay for one of my classes on Feminism and the literature during the 1970s Women's Movement. It reminded me of a Women's Studies class I took a few semesters ago. I was at war with my professor who is the common definition of the word feminist. Why were we at war? Because I was very vocal about how some of the things "feminists" are "supposed" to do to show their independence from man were more damaging than helpful. She use to single me out in class and ridicule me for waiting until marriage. I will never forget the first time she asked if anyone was actually still waiting and I was the only one who raised their hand. Jaws dropped. A few girls told me after class that they admired me for doing so and that they would do the same if they could go back in time and change things. Still, from that point on, I was picked on by the prof. Any time a subject like a V-Monologues (which she urged us to go to and which I lost points on for not attending) or anything of that nature would come up, she'd get in her little jab... even if it was a "No offense to Emmy who knows nothing about what we're talking about" or a "Emmy, you have no right to answer this because you've never experienced it."

I hate it when feminists take saints like St. Maria Goretti and criticize her for "wanting" to die instead of letting her attacker have his way with her. I would've done the same thing St. Maria Goretti did. In fact, I have... in a way.

When I was a freshman/sophomore in high school, I attended a public high school. I worked as a counselor's assistant the summer between my freshman and sophomore year doing office work. One day, when the counselors had a meeting, the other counselor's assistant, a young man 4 years older than me, cornered me in the office. Since everyone knew the counselors had afternoon off, no one came in and the guy apparently thought it was a good time "to be alone." I was in no one attracted to him nor did I ever make it seem like I was. As I was re-stacking the papers and pamphlets in the office, he grabbed my arms and pinned me against one of the tables. He told me these things I will not repeat but let's just say I could have slugged him for it if both of my arms weren't being restrained by his hands. I was so disgusted, and frightened, that I found a physical strength I didn't know I had and I pushed him off of me with all the force I was able to get. I may look small in size and age but I pack a wallop. (There have been a few guys who have been on the receiving end of my slaps and sucker punches.) I pushed the guy so hard, he wound up stumbling on the table in back of him. I was ready to punch and kick him when an administrator came in. They did nothing to the guy and the few people I told basically said to forget it because he was so beloved that no one would believe me. I did have two wonderful friends who not only believe me (because they know the kind of person I am), but one of them, a guy, stayed with me at the office for the rest of the summer. I left the school a semester after the incident and it's part of why I got anxiety at 15.

The point of me sharing that is that feminists will take a story like mine, which is NOTHING compared to what happened to St. Maria Goretti or St. Dymphna, and put their own spin on it. I'd probably get props for not letting a man take control of my fate, and standing up for myself. but then the question would come up... if I were in real danger, would I give in to save my life? Or would I do what it takes to preserve my purity? No question, I'd do the same thing both of the saints I've mentioned, as well as others, and fight. This is where feminists would have an issue. I can just hear them now "Don't be stupid. Rape is something you can get over, death isn't." Then they'd probably lecture me on how the Catholic Church has "brainwashed" me into thinking that I shouldn't express my "needs and desires." These type of things I've heard before and each time I feel bad because they just simply don't get it.

Of course, feminists usually advocate being in charge of what one does with their selves. Their argument is usually "I'm taking charge of what happens to my body. I can take care of it." Then they say things that contradict each other. "Pornography is horrible because it objectifies women... but if a woman wants to do it and is control of her body, let her do it. It's her freedom."... "If a woman dresses provocatively, men will objectify her. But, if she wants to dress like that because she wants to feel sexy, then let her. It's her body." Then, there's my all-time favorite (please note the sarcasm) phrase, "If a woman wants to have an abortion, let her. It's her body and she can do what she wants with it." Yes, please let women take the life of an innocent child and completely destroy her body in the process because she doesn't want to have a child. *rolls eyes* I'm actually doing my last essay for my Philosophy/Ethics course on why abortion is morally wrong... which will be the second part to my Feminism posts in the near future. All I will say about this, for now, is that my presentation/essay ends with the phrase "You can keep telling us to keep our rosaries off your ovaries, but your ovaries NEED our rosaries."

If these so-called feminists stopped their whole "Equality for all!" dribble they could see that what they're actually doing is putting women at a greater risk. As much as they'd like to think that women can do EVERYTHING men can do, that's simply not true. Likewise, there are things (like giving birth) that women can do that men can't. We were not designed to do the same things. Even if we take religion out of the equation, it's still be clear that we're not all alike and trying to put this front about how we're supposed to "get out of the backwards teachings of religion and the 'Leave it to Beaver' era" is actually harmful to women. Our minds, souls, and bodies are temples and should be treated as such. "Know you not that your bodies are the members of Christ? Shall I then take the members of Christ, and make them the members of an harlot? God forbid." (1 Corinthians 6:15)

I will stop this post here because I have to go continue studying for finals... and because I have a second post that I will hopefully post as soon as I finish my finals. I know this post will both shock and upset some of my friends because only a couple of people have known about this. All I have to say about what happened to me is that I forgave the guy for what he attempted to do and I pray for him.

Alright, that's enough stalling. lol. I hope everyone has a good weekend... I hope I do, even though my birthday "curse" has already began to strike. Long story. lol.

As always, thanks for reading and God Bless. :)
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