Friday, May 23, 2008

Cancer News, Greetings from Germany, Change of Plans and Dreams.

First off, I want to give a big WHOOOOOOOOOO!!! because my father has been declared cancer free!!! We just found out a few days ago but since I've been so busy, I haven't had the time. Either way, we're SO HAPPY for dad. He'd been in chemo for over a year and he was getting very tired. Hopefully he'll stay cancer free for the rest of his life because I don't know if he'll be able to make it through a third time. :( We've got to stay optimistic though. :D

Recently I received an early birthday present from a good friend who's currently living and working in Germany... and I can't open it. She specifically wrote that I can't open it for another couple of days. Boo! lol. I'm going to have to give it to mom to hold because I'm too weak to wait. Haha. Hey, I know my weaknesses... this certainly is one. lol. Anyway, it's exciting for me to get stuff from Germany because I love the country and I might be going out there soon. See, my friend in Germany and I have been planning for my trip out there for a year now. Since I was planning on attending a private Catholic college, I had told her that I wouldn't be able to go because of the tuition (which would've been about $32,000 a year!) but since ALL MY PLANS CHANGES, I might be able to go now. Yay!

And speaking of change of plans... I had absolutely NO say in the matter. Due to the recession going on we're making some major sacrifices in the family... and mine had to be my education. Again, I had NO say in what happened. All I know is that one day my parents were all "We support you in whatever you decide to do. We'll help you pay for college" and then the next "We're not going to sign a loan and you can't afford to pay for it yourself so I guess you're not going." Yes, just like that. It completely stinks! So, now I have to enroll at a community college because there's NO WAY I'm going waste time and not further my studies. I already have my schedule planned as well. I have 5 courses which would seem like a heavy load except that I've taken two already (need to take it twice to get credit -- even if I got an A the first time, I need another one this time around). I'm going to have to re-apply to other schools in a few months, as well as scholarships because, sad as it is, I know my parents won't help me pay for school and it's all up to me to come up for the money for tuition. I am definitely still going for my Religious Studies degree (I've decided to become a teacher and teach RST if I don't make it as an author), Catholic college or no Catholic college. I still want to attend one but if it's not in God's plans for me (as this previous school almost was), then I can't change it.

Something my sister D said about my change of plans really stuck with me. She said that maybe God has bigger plans for me that don't involve a college degree because Lord knows how long I've been trying to finish my Bachelor's. So maybe He does have bigger plans for me. Maybe my dream of being a writer is my destiny. You certainly don't need a degree to be an author and I get more work done when I'm not in school. I don't know but I've put myself in His hands and I know He'll point me in the right direction.

And maybe there's clues in my dreams. Yes, we're not supposed to read into our dreams but I've been having some pretty wild ones lately. A few days ago I had a dream that California had an earthquake followed by a tsunami wave. I was caught in the wave (while in a car, under a bridge) but somehow managed to swim rather quickly up to top of this tall building and save my little brother (which I don't have in real life) in the process. Yesterday I had a dream that California was about to have a 7.0 earthquake. I also dreamt I was against people who did magic to get gain things and had St. Teresa of Avila and San Benito (or St. Benedict in English) who is the patron saint against witchcraft. I've been having a lot of dreams that feature Pope Benedict XVI. I have a feeling I'm having these dreams for a reason, but I don't know what this reason is. Only time will tell.

Alright, well, I am exhausted (been a bit sick with a stomach thing the past few days) so I should go to sleep since it's almost half past midnight. 'Til next time, thanks for reading and God Bless. :D

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